Female Viagra
 

I am all in favor of Maple-Flavored Sluts. Carry on.

Female Viagra
 

I'm pretty sure those were made in America. Although the originals were quite nice. Nicer, in fact.

Translation needed
 

I've adopted a kid for Christmas through the bar association, and I'm having trouble understanding the lingo of her list.

Bratz doll?
Leapfrog?

And what sort of clothes are in with the four-year-old set?

Fa-La-La-La, La La, La La La <whump>
 

Hank is a dinosaur
 

Ty - you could end up in sunny's bf's lunchbox collection! http://www.qwantz.com/lunchbox.jpg

Translation needed
 

Bratz are truly twisted little dolls that celebrate the sexualizing of girls the age of Jonbenet Ramsey as a cultural value. Don't support her in this regard. Get her Barbies. Barbies will only warp her self-image; Bratz will encourage her to hook up on the jungle gym.

Leapfrog is a kind of electronic gizmo that you insert books into and they pronounce words, give answers to math problems, teach basic foreign langauges, depending on the books you buy to go with them. They are wonderful toys.

Translation needed
 

Bratz dolls are like Barbies, but sluttier.

Leapfrog makes educational toys (founded by an ex-lawyer too), so you'll need more clarification.

eta: what wonk said.

Translation needed
 

Hm. Does the thought of leapfrogging a Bratz doll, but "unfortunately" missing, appeal?

Hank's new avatar
 

Since people seem to be upgrading to sexier avatars, the above gave me a suggestion for Hank.

http://image.guardian.co.uk/sys-imag...8/lemmon34.jpg

Yes, Lemmon is dead now, but it's still an improvement.

Translation needed
 

Agreed to a certain extent. The heavy makeup isn't cool. But you can find Bratz that aren't too slutty. And for black and spanish kids, the features and skin tones beat the shit out of barbie.

http://www.etoys.com/g/toys/big/121035.jpg

http://www.etoys.com/g/toys/big/121034C.jpg

http://www.etoys.com/g/toys/big/120942.jpg

TM

Translation needed
 

Unless you can swear to RT that your toy alter ego wouldn't try to bang all of those chicks, perhaps even in a group, I suspect she'll be going with Leapfrog.

Steriods
 

You know, once upon a time, I invented James Dean avatars. And mine was better.

But I've grown since then.

Butter anyone?

Translation needed
 

At least one of my egos is having foursomes.

TM

Hank's new avatar
 

New Avatars are for Closers only.

Translation needed
 

This reminds me. I saw a 14-17 year old (I can never accurately guess their ages) wearing leg warmers the other day.

I immediately thought of PLF and his love for the 80s.

Translation needed
 

Is this one J-Lo? She's missing her Ben Affleck doll or Marc Anthony doll.

eta Ben Affleck doll.

http://us.st8.yimg.com/store1.yimg.c..._1819_30998704

Translation needed
 

Judging by her hat, she's a pimp. Very empowering -- usually women are the hos, not the pimps.

Translation needed
 

I find the oversized heads and feet rather disturbing. But I've been having vertigo all day, so maybe I'm oversensitive.

Translation needed
 

I dunno about the feet, but I think the head is just to keep in girls' heads that we should all aspire to lollipop-head status.

Translation needed
 

See, now the Affleck doll has a big head, but teeny tiny feet. Heh heh heh. I don't think he could hang on to a Bratz girl.

"Click to enlarge" -- as if!

Steriods
 

Nice. An underappreciated flick.

Translation needed
 

They look like those Steve Madden shoe ads in the subway.

Translation needed
 

I found a disturbing link to previously unknown (to me anyway) Ben Affleck masturbation video. Anyone seen this? Anyone want to?

Steriods
 

You'e kidding, right?

That movie blows.

Steriods
 

I have no idea what movie you're talking about, but you might be proving AdL's purnt.

Steriods
 

Nope. I enjoyed it, though that probably says more bout me than it does about the movie.

Something to make you want to poke your eyes out
 

A picture of Star Jones in a low V-neck with no bra. It's enough to make even TM want to cancel Breasticle day.

http://cache.gettyimages.com/comp/51...1B2AC3A62513D3


ETA: It seems this link produces a smaller pic than the one I viewed. Count your blessings.

Steriods
 

"Last Tango In Paris"

Translation needed
 

I think the Bratzs have big feet to keep them stable when they are in a standing position. Note that Ben's small feet are locked together -- can't have that on the Bratz chicks, might encourage today's pubescent girls to keep their legs together. And Wanker would HATE that.

Translation needed
 

I didn't realize they were wind-up dolls.

Something to make you want to poke your eyes out
 

I have to say it - her cleavage looks like a greasy quivering slab of salty roast beef.

She also appears to have armpit flab, which I have never seen before - at least not on someone wearing an evening gown.

Translation needed
 

My Ken fucked my Barbies all the time. I animated them with my own two hands.

Today's kids are spoiled. Never have to use their imaginations. Stifled.

Translation needed
 

My Ken fucked my Barbie too, but he was always a little too worried about messing up his hair (I had the brunet Ken with the stick-on facial hair) to muster much enthusiasm.

Translation needed
 

My Ken had hard plastic hair. I don't think there was gel yet, but it could pass for heavily gelled.

I didn't really have a good understanding of the mechanics and variety of positions until after I stopped playing with them (and, they aren't very bendy) so mine tended to lie on each other and only move a little bit.

Not surprisingly, Barbie was on top about half the time.

Hank's new avatar
 

The Glengarry avatars are gold. You will not get them.

Hank's new avatar
 

It's over and then it begins.

Translation needed
 

Mattel did me a considerable disservice by not having the Barbies be anatomically correct. I was informed of the concept of sex*, but it made no sense at all when the Barbies were disrobed and there was no tab A or slot B to practice with. That tab A could go into slot C did not come up until much, much later, and I wasn't playing with Barbies then.



*By whom, I can't remember. I'm thinking best friend's older brother. I dutifully passed down everything to my siblings.

Translation needed
 

Wait a minute, you have a tab A here but no slot A -- are there just slots B, C and D, and if so are you only paying attention to tab A when there are other tabs out there?

Please clarify the slots and tabs thing. Use an anatomically correct doll if at all possible.

Thank you. Let's drink to our life in this hotel!

Translation needed
 

It's been said before, but nice avatar, RP.

Maybe we should all go black & white for that artsy look.

Sidd?

http://www.abnormalfocus.com/bw-foot.jpg

Translation needed
 

Black and white is good.

Your happiness is my hap-penis.