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Open Foot, Insert Mouth

Quote:

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
There you are, standing/kneeling, holding your dick in your hand, asking yourself "Why the fuck did I do that?"

Sounds like large portions of my litigation career.

Open Foot, Insert Mouth

Quote:

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Have you ever tried that IRL? I know why porn stars do it, of course. But IRL, jerking off on the tits is really kind of a lackluster ending. There you are, standing/kneeling, holding your dick in your hand, asking yourself "Why the fuck did I do that?"

I don't think women are impressed by distance or volume the way you might be; it's really a senseless display.

Marriage has changed you. You didn't say "chicks," you said "women."

Quote:

Originally posted by spookyfish
Oddly, I've always thought of her more as the "precious moments" type.

And here I've always thought Hummels and Precious Moments were the same thing. Color me embarrassed.

Quote:

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
And here I've always thought Hummels and Precious Moments were the same thing. Color me embarrassed.

Imagine my embarrassment for knowing the difference.

Quote:

Originally posted by spookyfish
Imagine my embarrassment for knowing the difference.

Which one is Mary Kate?

Quote:

Originally posted by robustpuppy
Which one is Mary Kate?

Sunny, of course.

Quote:

Originally posted by spookyfish
Sunny, of course.

Is that the pretty one? Or the one that is not as pretty? Is the pretty one the eating disorder one?

Quote:

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Is that the pretty one? Or the one that is not as pretty? Is the pretty one the eating disorder one?

I think the one with the eating disorder is not the pretty one. Hence, the eating disorder, which you are probably perpetuating with your categorization.

Quote:

Originally posted by spookyfish
Oh sure. Like a guy with a huge penis needs to be funny.

Now you're on the "Hank posts too much" bandwagon?

Quote:

Originally posted by ltl/fb
At what point did your hand go down his pants?

ETA Funny is good, and congrats.

Thank you! It happened mid-date, I suppose. We weren't still in the bar giving Tony a free show or anything.

Quote:

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Is that the pretty one? Or the one that is not as pretty? Is the pretty one the eating disorder one?

Despite the fact that I'm skinnier than Paigow, I'm not the one with the eating disorder. The eating disorder one is also rumoured to ahve a a coke habit, so Paigow most definitely is that one...only Paigs, unlike the coked up vomit machine twin, isn't a skeletor. Weird, for someone with an eating disorder, but whatever.

Quote:

Originally posted by sunnybunny
Despite the fact that I'm skinnier than Paigow, I'm not the one with the eating disorder. The eating disorder one is also rumoured to ahve a a coke habit, so Paigow most definitely is that one...only Paigs, unlike the coked up vomit machine twin, isn't a skeletor. Weird, for someone with an eating disorder, but whatever.

You must have a huuuuuuuuuuuuge penis.

Quote:

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
Thank you! It happened mid-date, I suppose. We weren't still in the bar giving Tony a free show or anything.

I'm not sure I buy this story...where does Tony Soprano allegedly hand out?

Open Foot, Insert Mouth

Quote:

Originally posted by Sidd Finch
So, the other day I'm talking to a (female) GA about our case that's going to trial next month, and I'm bitching about all the bullshit we need to get done (list your contentions of fact and law. Now list your exhibits. Now list them again, in different order. And so forth.)

Eventually we figure out that we had a couple of extra weeks to do some of this, but rather than take that time I decided -- let's just get it over with. That will let us focus on the stuff that really matters, like witness exams and jury instructions.

Unfortunately, I went on to add "I'm sick of all the damned foreplay, I want to get to the stuff that actually matters." After a brief hush fell over the room, I bravely added "That's not to say that the foreplay doesn't matter, I mean."

So, here's my question: Could I get sued for that? Are there any other potential negative repercussions?

Note: It's unlikely that I would be nailing this particular GA anytime soon, for a variety of reasons, some of which are significant. So I'm not so worried about having torpedoed my chances of that. (Or is "thinks foreplay doesn't matter" a positive reference these days? I've been out of things for awhile...)

I don't know much about sexual harrassment law but I think its safe to say that your title of greatfuck has gone out the window.

Quote:

Originally posted by sunnybunny
I'm not sure I buy this story...where does Tony Soprano allegedly hand out?

I'm not sure I care if you buy this story. Actually, not true. I am sure that I don't.