Oh, NotBob?
 

Attention! Olsen twin with the eating disorder! Being skinnier will not make you prettier. In fact, after a certain point skinnier is uglier and malnutrition is bad for the hair and skin and teeth.

Start binging on plastic surgery instead. You've got the $$ for it.

date
 

That's what I'd say too were I making up a story.

date
 

Nice use of subjunctive, but you sound like an idiot. Out in NY or out in LA, it's not improbable to end up sitting near famous people. Just like in DC it's not improbable to end up sitting near elected/appointed officials, or to run into reporters seen on TV and stuff.

ETA why the hate for gwnc? everest have a teenie weenie and unfunny?

date
 

Aw, c'mon. I don't even know her, and I buy the story. What's so hard?

date
 

If she made it up, don't you think she would have picked a better fat guy - like Ron Jeremy?

date
 

2. I sat next to Jack Kervorkian at a restaurant once, pre-conviction.

date
 

Nah. That's called overcompensating.

Open Foot, Insert Mouth
 

Hmnm, good thinking -- I'd probably be able to nail her that way, despite the whole "foreplay not important" issue.

Open Foot, Insert Mouth
 

Expensive gifts are foreplay, to a significant number of women.

Open Foot, Insert Mouth
 

That's because chicks ARE impressed by the chest full of jism. Sebby was drawing a subtle distinction.


(But marriage has changed him -- he didn't used to do subtle.)

Oh, NotBob?
 

Well we always do think of you as Paigow- lite. All the verbal diarrhea without the wit or intelligence.

Farewell, Anonymous Poster
 

I learned yesterday afternoon that a certain board participant (Poster #1) was going to meet another board participant (Poster #2) who, though prolific, even legendary, nobody seems to have met irl. Though Poster #2's hometown is something of a dump, it is large enough that surely several people would have gone their on business and had the opportunity to meet Poster #2. We knew of one person who had spoken to Poster #2 and said that Poster #2 had a creepy voice, kind of like that of a serial killer.

We both came to a sudden realization. Poster #2 is a serial killer. Several posters probably have met Poster #2, they just didn't live to tell about it. This explains the declining number of posters on this board. Poster #2 is out with another poster in their dump of a hometown who probably helps dispose of the corpses.

Anyway, I have not heard from Poster #1 today, nor has Poster #1 posted. Assuming the worst, Poster #1 left me with some farewell messages in the event he did not survive his meeting with Poster #2, which apparently he did not. Here are those messages:

"Tell my wife I love her.
Tell TM he's skinny.
Tell gwinky she was supposed to pay me in cigarettes, but I would've accepted sex instead.
Tell Robust I'm sorry I never met her puppies.
Tell Sidd he's full of shit, just because.
Tell Atticus I meant to pay him that $10.
Tell ABBA I'm offended that she didn't throw me to the floor of the hotel bar and screw my brains out. I wouldn't have been able to accept the offer, but still, it's nice to be asked."

Farewell, Poster #1. I hope you're in only the best of refrigerators.

date
 

ltl

You are almost as opaque as sunny bunny.

1) She doesn't disbelieve the Tony Soprano part. Hell, she knows one of the people on Project Runway. She doesn't buy
a) that someone would be so whorish as to slip their hand down a veritable stranger's pants, mid date, probably in public. Especially someone that someone met on an online dating site.

b) She doesnt hate gwnc, or she didnt, until gwnc hated her first. In fact, I am starting to see why Senor LUnchbox likes her, despite the fact that he seems like a nice guy. I think its bc of her childish retorts. He probably buys her milk at lunch.

Open Foot, Insert Mouth
 

Hell, she lives "foreplay not important".

Farewell, Anonymous Poster
 

Re: Poster #1:

Fuck 'em. Serves 'em right for going to that dump.