Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield (Post 514580)

ETA: This reminded me of one more maddening thing about the suburbs: Food wasting.

Every party must involve twenty different dishes, many brought by guests. All portions are huge (the shrimp tray has it own zip code, and the crudite eats up half the kitchen island). And nobody eats any of it (I believe, paralyzed by the paradox of choice: "I'd like a donut hole. But I can't decide which coconut variant of the 17 offered is the best choice, and I don't want to look like a neophyte. Maybe I'll just take a bite of one of the fourteen plates of Humboldt Fog. But... which one is the best?")

Because every children's party needs to have 740 crab claws. And a 1/1000th size Mayan pyramid of melon balls. Like edible assortments? Well, there's one in every room. Nothing like a houseful of kids running around on cream carpeting with massive genetically engineered franken-strawberries covered in chocolate.

And we haven't even ordered the 37 pizzas for the kids yet!

Would you like a craft beer? You look like a craft beer kind of guy. There's a metal bathtub in the gazebo filled with a six pack of each of the 48 varieties of Sam Adams... and something called Landshark. Looked like fun! Drink up. The wife and I are wine drinkers. We're just going to throw away what's left... Or at least what'll fit in the front-end loader we use to clean up after these things!

Originally Posted by Did you just call me Coltrane? (Post 514594)

If we are doing this then I recommend Casa Dragones for sipping tequila. Even the blanco is good.

Originally Posted by Tyrone Slothrop (Post 514557)

The economics of delivery work better where you can get around well by car.

Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski (Post 514565)

All that said, for me my favorite place to stay is the UWS. I can get to the street and walk to almost everything I want to do every day. If not there is the subway. And the best part of every day's experience (and ofter the worst) is that walk/ride.

Originally Posted by Tyrone Slothrop (Post 514597)

It's weird how parties in the city (and the country) always have exactly enough food and drink. No wastage. Weird.

Originally Posted by Adder (Post 514600)

The single worst policy decision we ever made in this country was to lead our cities away from being designed around mostly walking and taking the streetcar/subway and toward accommodating car trips (to and from the suburbs). Cars have their uses, but they absolutely kill cities.

Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 514602)

The use of cars was inevitable but it was the morons who invented suburban zoning who really knocked ten points off the country's average IQ.

Originally Posted by Did you just call me Coltrane? (Post 514589)

Some suburbs in established cities (like NYC, Chicago and Boston) don't look like suburbs at all. They look like towns ("Anytown, USA Jerry - Oh you gotta mulch. You got to"), with a town center and independent restaurants. No strip malls. You know this.

Originally Posted by Pretty Little Flower (Post 514586)

When you die, you are going to hell. In that hell, there will only be one meal. Pizza. The pizza will always be made exactly the same. It will consist of a gluten-free English Muffin topped with Ketchup and a single slice of non-dairy American Cheese substitute, cooked for an insufficient amount of time in a toaster oven that smells of burnt plastic.

Originally Posted by Adder (Post 514599)

Or bike, e-bike or scooter, and the travel distances are shorter.

Originally Posted by Adder (Post 514604)

If it was mostly built out before 1950 (or so), it has a shot at being acceptable. I also almost don't hate some of the post-2000 planned communities that emulate a town, with entertainment and commercial centers in the middle, some retail options with sidewalks and bike trails. My FIL lives in one in Lincoln, NE that's okay thanks to two okay places to eat that he could walk two blocks to get to but doesn't.

Some of them go too far and turn too Stepford, though.

Originally Posted by Tyrone Slothrop (Post 514606)

Yes. Delivery works in cities too. My point, which I didn't make clear enough, is that delivery services like DoorDash and UberEats are helping suburbs close the gap to cities, restaurant-quality- and -choice-wise. Not eliminate, but close.

Originally Posted by Tyrone Slothrop (Post 514607)

Those suburbs were typically built around train stations.

Originally Posted by Adder (Post 514604)

If it was mostly built out before 1950 (or so), it has a shot at being acceptable. I also almost don't hate some of the post-2000 planned communities that emulate a town, with entertainment and commercial centers in the middle, some retail options with sidewalks and bike trails. My FIL lives in one in Lincoln, NE that's okay thanks to two okay places to eat that he could walk two blocks to get to but doesn't.

Some of them go too far and turn too Stepford, though.

Originally Posted by Tyrone Slothrop (Post 514607)

Those suburbs were typically built around train stations.

Originally Posted by Did you just call me Coltrane? (Post 514592)

Was it Neko Case?

Originally Posted by Adder (Post 514600)

The single worst policy decision we ever made in this country was to lead our cities away from being designed around mostly walking and taking the streetcar/subway and toward accommodating car trips (to and from the suburbs). Cars have their uses, but they absolutely kill cities.

Originally Posted by Tyrone Slothrop (Post 514603)

I, like Atticus, am no fan of zoning, but isn't the problem also like that lots of people like suburban living. I hear that Houston has no zoning, and it's not like it's that much denser than a lot of other places. Is that wrong?

Originally Posted by Pretty Little Flower (Post 514613)

This was not so much a decision in Minneapolis as mush as it was corruption wherein the automobile company lobbyists got a stranglehold on the government and "persuaded" them to get rid of the street cars and make Minneapolis into a car-dominated city. That said, I live outside of the downtown area and am still within six blocks of something like ten restaurants, so I can't complain too much.

Originally Posted by Did you just call me Coltrane? (Post 514610)

Yeah, we have houses dating back to the 1870s (I know - not that old). Architecturally, there really is no pattern. Mid-century next to an old tudor next to a craftsman next to a cape cod next to a bungalow next to a colonial, etc. The smaller ranches are getting gobbled up though. In 20 years it's probably going to look much different, but by then I'll be living in the english countryside.

Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 514598)

Thanks. With kids just turning 21 now I'm starting to pick up more stuff I don't drink for them and their friends. I need to add a tequila to the bar.

Originally Posted by Did you just call me Coltrane? (Post 514617)

Don't give them fancy pants tequila. We did just fine with Natural Light.

Originally Posted by Did you just call me Coltrane? (Post 514618)

Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 514614)

And we're back to my original point that what really sucks about the suburbs are the suburbanites.

Originally Posted by Did you just call me Coltrane? (Post 514619)

I also recently had some Red Breast 12 year. That is good stuff, and I normally don't like Irish whiskey.

Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 514616)

They don't make houses like they used to.

Thing is, I signed on to one of the real estate marketing sites and searched for a 17th century castle on 100 or more acres of land anywhere within two hours of Boston and only one came up. And for that one, they've already subdivided the thieves forest and sold it off.

Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 514563)

Good list, but I just want to make sure you know the current thing is outdoor pizza ovens. You've got to have an outdoor wood fired pizza oven.

I'm thinking of this one, and having a little brick base built for it. What do you think?

Originally Posted by Tyrone Slothrop (Post 514620)

I think Jean Paul Sartre was on to something when he said, "l'enfers, c'est les autres."

Originally Posted by Replaced_Texan (Post 514623)

We have a gas one someone gave us as a gift. We've used it twice. Graham also has a grill and an electric smoker. Plus the fire pit. He's into the cooking of meat. But honestly, the sous vide gets used more than any other gadget in our household.

My dad has a wood fired one at the ranch. And a barbecue pit that can smoke 10 briskets and six hams simultaneously. And an outdoor fireplace with a grill. If you're ever in Texas, come visit. We cook a lot.

My parents are moving from an apartment in the middle of Houston to a 500 acre ranch ten miles from the closest WalMart. Not a suburbanite to be found anywhere nearby, but it'll be a massive adjustment. They are about half time in each right now, and the appeal of the peace and quiet of the ranch is winning out. But it's sort of an all or nothing thing. The half rural suburb thing has absolutely no appeal whatsoever.

Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski (Post 514579)

Pizza was invented in Southern Italy, and today its true meaning is protected by the AVPN http://www.pizzanapoletana.org/en/chi_siamo which tests and trains pizza makers to make sure they are meeting the actual strict standards it maintains. Do you or ggg claim linensure? Because otherwise you might be putting meat, cheese and tomato sauce on crust, but you are hardly making pizza.

Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield (Post 514590)

Semi-related, if you've not switched the cheese on your caprese salad (i eat a lot of those) from mozzarella to burrata, make the shift. Mmmmmmm. So rich.

Originally Posted by Tyrone Slothrop (Post 514603)

I, like Atticus, am no fan of zoning, but isn't the problem also like that lots of people like suburban living. I hear that Houston has no zoning, and it's not like it's that much denser than a lot of other places. Is that wrong?

Originally Posted by Tyrone Slothrop (Post 514624)

I live a neighborhood of single-family homes with some pretty excellent neighbors, because we self-selected with them into a oddball housing type that appeals more to a certain crowd.

Originally Posted by Replaced_Texan (Post 514626)

The one place certified by the Napolese in Houston is three blocks from my house. It's pretty damned good.

Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield (Post 514593)

Obviously, don't develop a habit of buying this. But when your spouse's business partner offers this at a dinner, drink half of it.

https://www.masterofmalt.com/whiskie...ar-old-whisky/

Originally Posted by Replaced_Texan (Post 514628)

We have zoning. It's just not called zoning. It's done by deed restrictions and HOAs and banks and city ordinances about how many parking spaces a restaurant must have before it can open or how close a place that sells booze can be to a school.

Car culture has also killed tons and tons of small towns. The downtowns in some areas of the country are just dead, while the areas around whatever highway is nearby flourish with gas stations and other places for passers by to pause for a minute or two.

Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy (Post 514631)

That website does samplers where you can get sets of wee drams of multiple whiskys. Cool.

Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski (Post 514621)

Replying to yourself? I’d say we already have an Atticus, but we don’t (sniff).

Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski (Post 514633)

you drink like old people fuck.

Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski (Post 514629)

translation: key parties. see the Ice Storm.