This is really gross, but I'm a new woman
 

I've done the apple thing, but a carrot? I'm not googling for that image from work. I always preferred the ice vodka bong which is amusing since I can't stand the taste of vodka. To me, it has a taste.

This is really gross, but I'm a new woman
 

I think that they already were. Extensive and repeated drug testing and polygraphs are par for the course for those kinds of jobs. Since they're federal, no touchy-feely "Polygraphs are an invasion of privacy and employees or potential employees can't be compelled to take them!" prohibitions for those kinds of gigs.

"True or false: You have smoked marijuana more than one thousand times."

"Uh, I'm not sure."

This is really gross, but I'm a new woman
 

This is why civilized people get hookahs. That's it. (Gravity pulls the water down as you pull the bottle up, I guess.) We usually just put a screen across the mouth of the bottle, which worked fine. It is an excellent high, and the efficiency is great if you are running low on weed.

eta: I'm given to understand that the federal "thresholds" for those drug questions is not as high as one might think, but varies significantly with different administrations. I had one acquaintance who was told by a CIA recruiter, in response to his disclosure, "we're not the fucking girl scouts, and we're not interested in people who are too afraid to inhale."

Dude, don't bogart that summary judgment brief!
 

There's nothing like illicit drug use to bring lawyers together.

This is really gross, but I'm a new woman
 

Is "bathtup" kind of like a variant of "schtup"?

Dude, don't bogart that summary judgment brief!
 

Yes, but unfortunately you are still making it a little boring.

Dude, don't bogart that summary judgment brief!
 

I now have another "two posters I get confused" -- str8 and mmmmmmmm. Kind of like I get Burger and Aloha mixed up -- completely irrational.

Though, maybe it's because I want an Aloha Burger. Mmmm, pineapple.

And gwnc's post made me laugh out loud, but I'm not allowed to do a post saying just that.

Dude, don't bogart that summary judgment brief!
 

But his timing is interesting. I just had a long chat, a few days ago, with a (senior, near retirement) staff member here about how so many of the younger lawyers and paralegals all had sticks up their asses, and no texture or personality of any kind, which we then discovered meant, to both of us, that they were all so busy resume polishing that they'd never done any interesting drugs.

Dude, don't bogart that summary judgment brief!
 

How can you get us confused? The only thing I can think of that we have in common is that we are both better than you.

Dude, don't bogart that summary judgment brief!
 

If you prefer, I can make fun of Canada, Britain and your teeth while I do it.

In other Canadian-related pot news, I can't imagine that the murder yesterday of 4 Mounties at a rural Alberta green team site is going to have a beneficial (from my perspective) effect on the enforcement of pot laws in Canada.

broadband
 

How's that different than charging for the Porn?

Dude, don't bogart that summary judgment brief!
 

Maybe you haven't done enough to make them feel comfortable discussing their illegal drug use.

broadband
 

Fuck. str8, they better not have gotten my MIL's secret chicken soup recipe, or both our asses are gone.

Dude, don't bogart that summary judgment brief!
 

Did I ever tell you about the time this goth chick and I spent 48 hours in her dorm room having sex because we'd taken too much acid to cope with going any farther than the bathroom down the hall?

You're right - I'm bored already.

broadband
 

What is your native language?