Thanks Patriots
 

Well, the Landing Strip is a good 170 miles away, but sure, if Houston based strip clubs aren't good enough for you.

Thanks Patriots
 

Yeah, he's just a $39 million slave. The $14,000 fine is union agreed. But I guess that's because Gene Upshaw was on Paul Tagliabue's leash.

Thanks Patriots
 

Oohh, me me me, too, especially if Sidd is going to be there in legwarmers.

And AoN, Olivia Newton-John is among the famous people with whom I share my birthday.

Thanks Patriots
 

Um, er, I don't know -- are they good enough for me? And vice versa?

But isn't 170 miles like next door, in Texas?

Thanks Patriots
 

Apparently, my new next door neighbor. I'm not sure how I prove this, but I'm pretty certain I'm correct.

Which reminds me, wasn't there someone on this board who did hits for relatively reasonable prices? (Was it Flinty? I can't remember.) Please let me know if you are interested in a contract job, and if you take Pay Pal.

Only in Chicago
 

Man. I wish there were pictures for this.

CHICAGO - A 79-year-old South Side woman bearing a toy gun and a visor that read "Princess" has been charged with trying to rob a downtown bank.

Cooke walked into the Bank of America branch Tuesday morning and told a teller that she'd just come from the dentist and could only speak quietly, according to an FBI affidavit.

As the teller leaned in, Cooke whispered a demand for $30,000 and brandished a gun that turned out to be a toy, the affidavit says. Instead of handing over any money, however, the teller triggered a silent alarm and walked away.

Officials said Cooke was dressed for the attempted heist in a black trench coat, sunglasses and a white "Princess" visor.

Princess the crook

Thanks Patriots
 

Compared to other pro sports, TM is correct. No guaranteed contracts, and if you get cut midseason, you don't get paid. Which means that those 5 year, $50 million deals are, to put it bluntly, bogus. The only money that is real is the signing bonus.

And the team will always ask to restructure the deal (i.e. -- make the player take a paycut), but God help the player with the balls to ask the team to restructure a deal. What bargaining power? The team can waive you if you don't take a pay cut, and can fine you if you hold out.

The NFLPA is indeed a toothless beast. Gene Upshaw is probably a nice guy, but the need a Marvin Miller or even a Don Fehr in charge.

Thanks Patriots
 

I desperately want her to use this image on the invitation. (spree: safe for work, but it'd fuck up the margins and piss off fringey if I posted it here)

Only in Chicago
 

Christ, nfh, there is much, much weirder stuff out there. I don't even know where to begin.

• Minnelli's ex asks judge to set aside prenup
  
  NEW YORK (AP) -- David Gest, the estranged husband of Liza Minnelli, asked a judge to set aside his prenuptial agreement with the star, the latest development in their lengthy divorce battle.
  
  Gest's lawyers told State Supreme Court Judge Harold B. Beeler that Minnelli hid the fact that she was infected with herpes, was an alcoholic and prone to violence.
  
  Had Gest known, the lawyers argued, he never would have entered into the prenuptial agreement.
  
  Minnelli's lawyer, Israel Rubin, refused to comment on specific allegations. "This whole thing is ridiculous," he said.
  
  Gest's lawyers on Friday asked Beeler to order a trial to determine the validity of the prenuptial agreement.
  
  Minnelli and Gest married March 16, 2002, at a celebrity-studded ceremony with Michael Jackson as best man and Elizabeth Taylor as maid of honor. They separated in July 2003 and filed for divorce later that year.
  
  The prenup request is the latest in a series of lawsuits and accusations traded between the former couple that have become tabloid fodder.
  
  Most recently, Minnelli argued in court papers that Gest and her former bodyguard, who claims she forced him to have sex with her to keep his job, joined forces to attack and embarrass her publicly. She claimed the bodyguard, M'Hammed Soumayah, 56, breached a confidentiality agreement by giving Gest information about her.
  
  Soumayah filed a $100 million lawsuit against Minnelli, claiming she assaulted him.
  
  Gest, 52, has filed his own $10 million lawsuit against Minnelli, saying that during the 15 months they lived together after they were married she repeatedly beat him so badly that he suffered nerve damage in his head.
  
  Minnelli has denied the claims.

http://www.cnn.com/2006/LAW/09/11/mi....ap/index.html

Thanks Patriots
 

Oh my god. The 20-minute workout. I used to do that all the time. Remember Bess? (or maybe it was Beth). She was the awesomest.

Thanks Patriots
 

No wonder you hate the Jets.

I've been to a few Jets games and the fans are completely insufferable. I have a friend who is a die-hard Dolphins fan and he has given up wearing a jersey when he goes. Fights, beer thrown, threats, insults to his gf (when he brings her). It's unbelievable. It's not like a Red Sox game, where that kind of behavior is ok.*

One time I was sitting 3 rows back, 50 yard line and that idiot fireman was right near me. As far as I can tell, he doesn't have tickets because he sits wherever he likes, if there is an open seat. He is a fanatic. Insane. This woman was sitting right next to us and she had a photo of herself and him (with him in his Jets fireman's hat, standing over her shoulder), with the greyish fake backdrop and the contrived pose that has made Sears so much money over the years. She was quite young and somewhat cute. I asked if I could see the photo. She showed it to me and I squelched a laugh and asked her if he was her dad. She said, "No. He's my boyfriend." I couldn't disguise my shock and disgust. She was used to the reaction.

TM

*That's a joke. Red Sox fans are given plenty of shit, but nothing like the danger the Yankees fan who was wearing a jersey was in at Fenway. Good Lord, those people are fucking crazy.

Thanks Patriots
 

They're french fries smothered on an Old Bay-like seasoning: delicious.

Thanks Patriots
 

The internet is an odd, odd place, where you find out that there are a lot of freaks out there.

One of those freaks has a homepage dedicated to the 20 minute workout and has screencaps from every single episode.

Sometimes google reveals too much.

Thanks Patriots
 

how long is that in American minutes?

Thanks Patriots
 

You could put Old Bay on dogshit and it would be delicious.