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I see. This lull you had this afternoon was just you all waiting for me to get back from lunch.

Oh, and gwinky, that was uncharacteristically hateful of you. PMS?

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Whiftastic, yet insightful. I need a drink (like that's news).

TMI
 

My mom just told me she and my dad just bought a kingsize that vibrates and goes up and down.

Swingin.

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good one.

And happy friday, twit.

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It may at least bring in more traffic than the more obscure thread titles.

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I don't think grandma really wants to invest that kind of time. She just wants to go right in with a kingsize.*

I agree re: same large yellow buttplug.

*thanks for posting that, paigow!

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Give a braindead sister a hand. How did I whiff? I proferred two choices and it was neither one?

Shouldnt you be driving down to Lessapalooza about now? everyone will be there. but me.

Ashleeee
 

Kind of like a rhinestone covered toilet brush. You can dress it up, but it's still Ashlee Simpson.

As you were
 

Was it nfh? Was it Sidd?

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Are you headed to Alburquerque? Are you taking your blanket and teddy bear?

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Why am I replying to this?

He was just agreeing that it is hard to find a gaping gash. See, he's a guy (at least on the internet), and a gaping gash has more appeal than it would to you or I. He's been meaning to try out his new stunt penis.


ETA: I missed the tribute portion. I'm assuming Ollie had his Zippo lit and was waving it over his head as he typed that.

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It was, in fact, something of a tribute. Last thread, GWINC said getting preggo was the only way to get a man; your response: don't I know that.

Here, you said "its hard to just come up with a gaping gash on the spot. " My response: don't I know that.

Sort of a tribute and a gaping gash joke, rolled into one generally unfunny post! Now where's that drink?

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Japanese garden in Hermann Park. 6:30.

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Don't believe her Ollie, the last time I did, I wound up tied to a tree being pelted with snack cakes.

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Because we never learn.

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I'm not sure I can wait that long, even using central time.

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You say that like it's a bad thing. Mmmm, tied up and beaten by Little Debbie.

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It could be frustrating if one weren't able to eat any of the cakes. But just had to watch them whizzing by, drooling around the ball gag.

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There were bees and fire ants involved. I don't want to talk about it.

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What tribute part?

Ancient Chinese (not so) Secret
 

We already there! Lessapalooza2005 has begun with bourbon and gingers at Mr. Bing's Cocktail lounge.

DON'T TELL PAIGOW WHERE WE ARE! SSSSSSSSSSHHHHH!

http://www.vbaccelerator.com/home/VB...rBingFloyd.png

Ancient Chinese (not so) Secret
 

Like I am surprised you are there? Where do you think Less first conceived of perfect spittle tray?

http://img.urinal.net/mr_bings/bings.med.jpg

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Yeah, the titles have sucked lately. Not that I'm one to talk...

Old Title
 

Will this turn Slave into a Jane Austen fan? (spree: Keira Knightly stars as Elizabeth Bennet in the latest version of Price and Prejudice.

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"Drink! Drink!"

http://www.fathertedonline.ukf.net/I...s/jackface.jpg

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Miscast. I like Keira Knightly, but she's not refined enough. I'd like to see Judi Dench as Lady Catherine, though.

Ugh
 

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn...050600151.html

NEW YORK -- To the dismay of gay-rights activists, the Food and Drug Administration is about to implement new rules recommending that any man who has engaged in homosexual sex in the previous five years be barred from serving as an anonymous sperm donor.

Bid Now!!
 

Toast the Runaway Bride (spree: eBay listing)

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You have your cyber-head so far up your virtual ass that, in a bizarre Escherian twist, you can actually see up into your own empty skull, and only occasionally get glimpses of the outside world by peering up and out through your vacant eyes.

I have never been more on top of my game. I am more charismatic, witty, sexy and loved than ever. I am bringing the Barclay's Cup home to Chelsea for the first time in 50 years and chicks dig me. There should be a mandatory signature line on this board that reads: "Thank you, Pretty Little Flower, for leading us to glory. You are the Jose Mourinho of the FB."

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quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
"[I am the] Jose Mourinho of the FB."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Do you know the actors in gay porno by name also?

Rotting From The Head
 

You got that right. You and Jose are like two dainty little Eurotrash peas in a pod. We are all completely unsurprised that you have chosen as your latest man-crush an effete whiner who is known across the world as the coach who taught his spineless, long-haired, greasy fancy-boys to roll around as if shot when an opposing player so much as cast a cruel glance in their direction.

His time-wasting, cynical theatrics have destroyed the soul of the beautiful game in much the same way as your insipid posts and unbridled narcissism have destroyed the soul of this board. The two of you deserve each other.

Rotting From The Head
 

One thing that Mourinho and I both know personally is how all the bitchy little haters start gunning for you when you are at the top of your game. Ironweak can fling his flaccid insults in my direction all he cares to, but ultimately it will lead to nothing more than yet another stomping hissy fit on his part as he dissolves in frustration when his impotent barbs continue to miss the mark. In some ways I pity poor Ironweak, for if I am the Jose Mourinho of the FB, he is surely the Iain Dowie, a homely pudge of a man whose hapless and preciously-named Crystal Palace struggle to avoid relegation while Chelsea sits comfortably at the top of the table. If the positions were reversed, I cannot say that I would necessarily be above a little hating. Fortunately, I'll never have to know what that's like.

Rotting From The Head
 

I hate to break it to you two little beeeyotches but no matter how you slice it soccer is a euro-pussy thang, which means both of you are whiny-lil-sharked-jumped-euro-pussy-beeeyotches.

Get a room and circle-jerk yourselves silly for national jerk-off month already.

Rotting From The Head
 

This helped me get Flower's original point- I agree. Both Dowie and Mourinho were journeyman level players that never did much. The only reason you hear about them at all is they started spending time telling real professional players what they think of their games.

Rotting From The Head
 

Out of respect for your intelligence, I will assume you intended this to be ironic on one level. But even the most charitable appreciation for your intellect prevents me from thinking you intended it to be ironic on two levels.

Sincerely,
B-List Poster

Rotting From The Head
 

You too? You just dropped a notch on my list of posters worth a damn.

Rotting From The Head
 

Hank is kinda dumb, also.

05/07/05
 

Happy haiku day! :confused: :confused: :rolleyes: :eek: :P

Rotting From The Head
 

No worries. I just need to wait for loberry to see a Guernica post, or my Eva Silverstein work on his catch-up. Then I'll be right back on top. Those are gold, man, gold!

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I liked the first one better. What happened?