1984 redux, redux
 

Dear Not Bob,

Thinking that breakdancing is sooo 1984 is itself sooo 1992. You might want to update your views on this issue.

Fondly,

The Flower

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

Plus, he's Canadian.

Oh, my sweet ltl twinkie, you had me at "Stop! I'm done. Now scram." How I miss you.

Sigh. We'll always have Lubbock, I guess.

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

I prefer college cheerleaders. Those USC girls have great sweater meat.

1984 redux, redux
 

Thank you for introducing me to this phrase, as I frequently find myself in conversations where I wish to refer to skills with a z replacing the final s, as opposed to skills with the traditional s. Since this is an electronic message board where we communicate in text, rather than with the spoken word, it seems to me that we could use acronyms as a handy shorthand (is that redundant? maybe so) for each expression. So SWAZRTFS should stand for skills with a z replacing the final s, and SWTTS should stand for skills with the traditional s.

Example: PLF's posting style shows mad SWAZRTFS.

1984 redux, redux
 

Dear Flower,

Thank you for your kind thoughts. I'll be sure to tell Bill Heller and Pinch Sulzburger that their choice of images to include in the 1984 slideshow was, and I quote, "sooo 1992." (Of course, they may think that this is a compliment, but perhaps Maureen Dowd or Elvis Mitchell will clue them in).

I realize, though, that my use of Thurgreed's picture as being illustrative of that time period may be an example of how "the liberal media" has biased me. I regret the error, and will strive not to repeat it.

Love,

Not Bob

1984 redux, redux
 

People doing it in the Midwest means it's NOT dead?

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

What a disgusting expression for something so dandy to have. No wonder you're stuck doing Dear Abby.

1984 redux, redux
 

If we're really lucky, the "Rerun" will also come back.

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

That is not a picture of a human.

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

Really, once they start jumping up and down for the NFL, they are pretty much knocking on the door of the slippery slope into colagen injections and thingmasters.

What is sweater meat?
 

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

Prima?

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

Don't worry PJ. I would never refer to your shirt puppies that way.

What is sweater meat?
 

Is this the cast of Tourist Trap?

For Atticus
 

A publishing company has put together a "teen friendly" version of the Bible, Extreme Teen Bible. World O'Crap took a look at a couple of the disclaimers to help out confused teens in interpreting some of the troublesome parts of bible, like Not Me's pesky polygamy issue, and offered a disclaimer of their own:

• What's up with God telling Abraham to kill his son Isaac? If you've been around any courtrooms or court TV shows, you're probably aware that today we don't approve of kid killing. But in chapter 22, we read about God testing Abraham by ordering him to sacrifice his only (legitimate) son. Genesis gives us a window into God's practical jokes that can be wacky to say the least. Remember, though, that Abraham was stopped before he actually touched the boy. And also remember that nobody other than Abraham was ever tested by God in just this fashion, as far as we know. So, if you think that God has ordered you to kill one or more of your children, please check with a psychiatrist or other mental health professional before proceding further.

Baseball Roundup
 

Mussina's jet lag
Gets us off to a rough start
Damn You Bud Selig

Boston no better
They'll need ten runs a game
Pedro's arm is toast

Toronto wildcard?
You have got to be kidding
Halliday shelled

Anaheim scary
Scoring ten in opener
Watch out Seattle

Hello Matsui
And no, not the Yankee one
Little Godzilla?

Poor Andy Pettite
He left New York for the cash
Now he's a loser

Bonds versus Clemens
My guess is high and inside
Which one will blink first

For Atticus
 

Is "world o crap" some kind of chocolate submarine reference? Scatticus should like that.

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

Exactly. It's just like Vegas -- when you're 25 you're too old to be a stripper at the good clubs.

1984 redux, redux
 

Fair point. But I'm telling you, those kids from Kansas City has mad FWAPHRTIF SWAZRTFS.

1984 redux, redux
 

That couldn't be me. I always brought my own cardboard.

TM

1984 redux, redux
 

BTW, I thought the last decade in which people stopped to look at other people on the sidewalks was the 1930s.

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

Nor I your trouser pencil.

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

You DO have a nice firm grip:

http://www.redhed.info/images/150_big%20pencil.jpg

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

But a crappy accompanying band.

1984 redux, redux
 

Hank is still angry that you tore down his childhood home.

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

Neither is this. It's either the bad contacts or something wrong with her eyes.
http://www.realitytvcalendar.com/sho...elor/karen.jpg

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

You really should look into getting yourself a thingmaster. You might not have to give so many blowjobs.

TM

1984 redux, redux
 

Nice try.

BTW, I find it interesting that you were the one providing the entertainment, yet Bilmore's dough was going into Slave's hat. Was it some sort of deal to get him out of that flannel shirt?

1984 redux, redux
 

And so the fuzzy sweater was born.

http://www.junebugknits.com/images/whitefuzzy.jpg

TM

Confidential to Bilmore and the oldtimres
 

You've been hepful. http://content.rollingstone.com/cont...s/00099740.jpg

Confidential to Bilmore and the oldtimres
 

Get the fuck out of here!

Of course I cannot!

http://www.fast-rewind.com/bhcop3.jpg

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

It's really not nearly as much fun if you take the punch lines yourself.

Confidential to Bilmore and the oldtimres
 

You know what I think? I think you had two scrolls and you smoked one. Am I right?

http://www.fast-rewind.com/goldench1.jpg

TM

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

Sure, all of these women are fairly attractive, but not one of them would make me walk into a wall. And the prosthetic technician looks like she had a serious run-in with a Dr. Nick Ventura-caliber plastic surgeon.

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

Finally, she remembers the guy who was into HS girls.

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

How about this? Hot pro soccer player.
http://www.realitytvcalendar.com/sho...lor/mandyc.jpg Or, this woman who looks like someone and I can't put my finger on it.
http://www.realitytvcalendar.com/sho...lor/mandyj.jpg

The women of The Bachelor 5 "were sexier, hotter and showed a lot more skin" according to B-5 producer Mike Fleiss. The premiere will also offer a new "first impression" rose, extended the woman who has made the best first impression on Jesse.

Additionally, ABC says the very first rose ceremony will take "a startling turn" when Jesse makes "a terrible mistake."

He probably calls out the wrong name at rose time. There are 2 Jennys, 3 Jessicas and 2 Mandys.

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

I call bullshit. Every rose ceremony is the "most exciting rose ceremony ever." They have no credibility on the comparatives. What's next: This Bachelor has the best soundtrack yet?

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

Potential Spoiler:

The best thing about this show is that one of the bachelorettes is really a mole -- she's really Jesse's best friend (and married to one of his friends) and she's going to tell him all the bitchy things the other women do behind his back. That is the only thing about this season that tempts me to watch. Otherwise, big yawn. Tired of this format and watching dumbass men who aren't ready to get married string along a bunch of ditzy pharmaceutical reps (is that a real job?) just to dump them a week after the final show airs and they realize that being on tv made it easier for them to have casual sex with lots of random women. Seriously, the bachelors are 0 for 4 so far. The bachelorettes are 2 and 0 (although it's early days for Meredith and Ian). All dating shows should have women choosing men.

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

No. But it pays well. That's why it's one of the best jobs out there.

The Bachelor tonight on ABC
 

MORE POTENTIAL SPOILER:



Maybe the "terrible mistake" is that Jock Boy forgets to give his friend a rose, so she can't help him any more???