is it just a stage?
 

Taught our's about rubbing at his penis

strangely i forgot to mention that the one thing that does hold his attention is compulsive masturbation

is it just a stage?
 

Dad?

Well, this is more basic of a problem than I first thought. Stop masturbating him, and he'll quickly find new hobbies.

You have clearly been seeing too much of that Michael Jackson mug shot.

is it just a stage?
 

So what's the answer?

How much does it change if it's a hot day in India?

is it just a stage?
 

Don't tell Shape Shifter. He may be inclined to test the hypo in the lab.

is it just a stage?
 

I love it when people use those ^s!

But you forgot the part about how much it changes on a hot day in India.

Temperatures - What is Too High?
 

I had no idea such a thing even existed! Quite the description. I think I'll just stick with Tylenol for myself and avoid the anal aspirin, thank you.

What's up
 

It's been quiet lately. How was everyone's holiday? We had a nice trip to Disneyland, some parties, but mostly a quiet time at home with just the four of us.

It's nice that school's back on, though. I think the kids were watching too much TV. There's only so much one can take of the Fairly Oddparents.

What's up
 

Four trips to the emergency room. Two broken bones, seven stitches. So, yeah, pretty quiet here, too.

(BTW, does anyone know where you can buy concrete furniture? They broke a couch, too. I didn't even know you COULD break a couch.)

Answer and Question.
 

Um, yes. http://www.concretenetwork.com/concrete/furniture/

Okay, my turn:

HELPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!! I have had a Nanny since last July (the July 4th weekend when Nanny #1 absconded to a foreign country and I found out the evening before Monday, in the middle of a huge transaction). I ended up hiring a woman with zero experience (couldn't even change a diaper) because she was a friend of the cleaning lady and, true to the cleaning lady's word, this woman has been loving to my child, and reliable in terms of not missing work.

But...no matter how many times I have tried to provide incentives, this woman does not want to do ANYTHING besides sit in the tiny living room with my child and have my child play with her own toys. It doesn't even occur to her to play patty-cake, or to have a pretend tea party. She teaches her nothing - not a rhyme, tune or anything.

I have tried to provide ideas and manufacture some variety to the day because I know it's not easy to be with a child all day. I signed up my child for a Gymboree type class for the Nanny to go to with her, and have encouraged her to meet other Nanny's and get my child out of the house, even if she runs her own errands and my child tags along. I even have an account at a local fancy cafe for her if she wants to take my child and have coffee. She's yet to use it.

I have asked her if she does not like the job and her reply is that she like my child and me so very much but basically "it's hard to find ideas on what to do with a baby." I would not have a problem with that kind of honesty, but what I do have a problem with is that when I asked her if she was looking to leave the job she said, "well, I don't have any other job right now" and also, she is NOT enthusiastic at all when I showed her all the places she could go to around town (like cool discount places for HER to shop, which she loves). Meanwhile I am paying more than ANY OTHER PERSON I KNOW for childcare.

O.K. - so....I am interviewing new Nannies this weekend. I just got off the phone with one who sounded GREAT!!!!! But... I am terrified of firing this Nanny because she has at least been very reliable, and I know that she absolutely loves my daughter. Sometimes, it takes her 1/2 hour to leave in the evening she is still saying goodbye to her. And also, I really really like her as a person. She's part of the family.

So....I have the hesitation to fire her which I would love to have your thoughts/experiences on. Also - it would be so much appreciated if I could get your thoughts on the firing process. I would do it on a Frida. She's never been a Nanny before and is probably thinking I'd give her two weeks notice. I of course would expect that from her. Problem: I don't know that I want anyone caring for my child for 2 weeks after I fired them. But on the other hand, if I were to give her the money instead, I am not thrilled with giving her $1000 (2 weeks pay) while having to pay that same amount to the Nanny who replaces her!!

So...there is my long story. Any and all help would be appreciated.

Edited to say: I am SO sorry for this message being so long.

Nannies
 

I will say this Nanny sounds OK in the grander scheme of things - of the one's we've had, and we did Au Pairs for a while so had at least one per year, she'd be about in the middle.

BUT, none of us want "OK" for our kids. You could always try the approach of, look, I like you, I know you like VietBabe, but if we can't get more interactive inside of two weeks you're gone. You also could try the let's also find a teenager to supplement at a cheap price. But none of us want to subject our kids to someone on the edge of getting fired, and the teenager approach might work but is a shot in the dark and more expensive.

So, it's never easy. I think you are doing the right thing, even if the next Nanny doesn't turn out to be as good as she seems at first. And I wouldn't worry much about paying an extra $1000 to make the severance easier - I guarantee you, over time that amount will be meaningless to you, but to her it may make a big difference.

Best!

Nannies
 

Yeah, this is no horror story. Not wonderful, but no bleeding or abuse at all.

If you didn't drag her away from some wonderful high-paying job that she has now given up forever in order to be with your child, then, if you fire her, she's in at least as good shape as she was at the beginning, and in fact probably better, since she has your money from that period.

Now, at her level, people just don't normally get two weeks notice. She likely wouldn't expect that at all. However, have you been paying taxes, unemployment, etc? 'Cuz, she may apply for unemployment, and then you'll have problems if you skated on that procedure. If that's the case, the $1k might be a good price for her goodwill in not applying. You don't need to pay it otherwise, but, if unemployment isn't an issue, it might simply be what you need to pay in order to assuage your own guilt.

(Firing is the most painful for the three days prior, as you think about it. Then, it lasts a half hour. Then, it's done.)

NannyGate
 

Hmmn. I do agree this is definitely not a horror story. That's why I'm struggling with the firing. I'm a real pushover and if I sensed she wanted this job I'd probably keep her just for that.

But...she has made clear that while she likes us, she is not happy what she is doing and is only with us because she doesn't have another job. Before she was with us, she was at a factory job that paid her less and worked her more. She was thrilled to be in a climate controlled place she could do her own wash and she said her coworkers annoyed her and she didn't want to have to deal with coworkers. I think the novelty wore off. She's bored out of her mind.

I've done everything I can to give her ideas what to do with the day. :poke: But...bottom line is she worked 8 hours today, 3 of them Vietbabe slept. I'd have gone shopping or hung out at the cool cafes in town with the Babe - some fine java and pastry :yum: charged to the house account of the Babe's Mom and chatted with the fine townsfolk. Instead, she stayed in and moped.

Well, I'm glad I wrote. I'm sensing here that I need to bite the bullet and shell out the $1,000 and do the icky deed. :uzi2:

I'm paying taxes on her (but only on $200 of it - she said she only wants it to show she's making that much so she pays less income tax) . Maybe she is waiting to reach the minimum amount of time you have to be working at a job to collect unemployment (don't know what that is) and then she'll bolt? This kind of sucks trying to figure this all out. But I assume it's sane not to want someone caring for your child after you fire them (in other words, I pay her the two weeks pay and she doesn't work during the two weeks).


Thanks again all, Happy New Year and have a great weekend!!:band: