Birth defect reported with defective grammar
 

An infant born with four legs, three hands, three kidneys and an abnormal liver to a rural Zambian woman two weeks ago, is pictured in Lusaka, July 2, 2003. Doctors at Zambia's main Lusaka University Teaching Hospital said July 3, 2003 the babies deformities were caused by incomplete growth of another fetus and multiplication of cells. They said the baby, whose is yet to be named, would be operated upon and is likely to lead a normal life. [spree: deformed baby unclothed from the waist down]

Well, with all those extra body parts, I suppose the baby can be referred to in the plural -- about a kid and a half, I guess.

The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain.
 

A survey which helps us find the places where people talk funny. (Spree: It doesn't address the /to-may-to/ vs. /to-mah-to/ debate. Sorry to disappoint.)

Birth defect reported with defective grammar
 

Yes, but the absence of an apostrophe is OUTRAGEOUS in either case.

And, weird!

a moment on the lips ...
 

From a stupid little encarta.msn story I clicked on after checking my email (about celebs who are/were members of Mensa):

"Alan Rachins played a lawyer on the Emmy Award-winning television program L.A. Law and currently plays Dharma's hippy father on Dharma and Greg."

Maybe he should go easy on the pot brownies.

Courrier Electronique
 

http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=stor...l__3&printer=1

(French admit inferiority of their language by requiring the term "e-mail" to be banned by law)

Ah Bartleby, Ah Humanity!
 

For your Timmying pleasure, The Elements of Style is available on-line!

Hyphens are underrated
 

especially in domain names, such as:

http://www.powergenitalia.com (spree: Oh please, when was the last time I linked to a porn site?)

The owner of the suggestive domain name isn't in the industrial-strength vibrator business, unfortunately. Rather, it's in the industrial-strength battery charger business. I suppose these two industries could be related -- if your vibrator is as big as a truck engine (and needs that extra oomph to power those strokes).

p(Another site which proves my point that hyphens are underrated is http://www.whorepresents.com -- when you want to find a special gift for that special hooker . . . or not)c

Romeo and Juliet, animated (with fresh dialogue!)
 

http://myboringlife.com/l33t/romeo.html [spree: YOUR COMPUTER WILL MAKE NOISES including What Is Love by Haddaway and some requiem set to a disco beat.]

(Wm. Shakespeare's tragedy, remodeled as a stick-figure animation, complete with chatroom dialogue and mis-spellings. While the action cuts to the chase in many instances, it is still cast as a five act play.)

Innuendos -- with pincites!
 

If you've ever wanted a cite-checking assignment that required a copy of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, it's here.

Shedding Aligator Tears
 

Anyway, it turns out the Florida Gators put a picture of a crocodile on the cover of their media guide. ESPN article.

Oops.

Politics. It's all so dehumanizing.

Illiterati on the op-ed page.
 

In yesterday's edition of the Wall Street Journal, I read an article that began as follows:

"Once again, the Episcopal Church has diffused a major crisis...."

I've noticed many similar homophonic lapses in the popular press over the last several years. This latest gaffe (the NY Times is also a serial offender) started me thinking about the most persistent, irritating mistakes that I've seen, which will probably end up as part of the 'accepted' lexicon through a combination of sheer editorial laziness, ineptitude and repetition. My candidates:

"diffuse" (defuse)
"principal" (principle [misused BOTH ways])
"tact" (tack [as in, 'to take a tack'])
"tow" (toe [the line])
"effect[ed]" (affect[ed])

There are more - I'm just too annoyed to think of them right now. Apparently, many people who write for a living these days have never bothered to READ much of anything beyond blogs and grocery lists, during their 'education' or otherwise.

Grrrrrr.

CDF (rant over - carry on)

[edited because I'm a Timmy, and this is the Timmy page]

Pet peeve
 

Wherefore, hereinafter neither shall be used, right?

Tim-me, tim-you
 

Therefore are thou Romeo?

Gender neutrality gone amok
 

Photo caption from the local paper:

It troubles me that some lunkheaded copy editor thought to change "fireman" (correct) to "firefighter" (incorrect and comically inaccurate, at least in the world of steam powered railways), but decided that discretion was the better part of valor and left "manning" alone.

Gender neutrality gone amok
 

Because "personning" the engine would make no sense?

"Manning"
 

Just don't think too hard about what "manning" really implies...

Manning
 

Hey, what kind of a fireman are you if you can't stoke those flames?

Gender neutrality gone amok
 

It would be tougher to make the story PC in France. "Road" translates as "chemin", a masculine noun. Perhaps "street", or "rue" a feminine noun would be culturally more sensitive.

But ultimately what's troubling is not the PC choices. For Pepper Ball to have found such a perfect heat related job is a happy thought. That the job may end Tuesday is sad. Please don't post updates unless the railstreet is saved.

Not NTTAWWT.
 

I'm a little peeved that CBS's "NCIS" was renamed "Navy NCIS," given that it already stood for Naval Criminal Investigative Service. Then WTF is "Navy" doing at the beginning of the title, you ask? CBS was worried that "NCIS" alone would create confusion with the CSI franchise. Redundancy is better than a Lanham Act violation, I guess.

Of course, we hear often enough about the "SAT test" or going to the "ATM machine" with our "PIN number." I imagine there are others.

Not NTTAWWT.
 

I was thinking the same thing the other night. But since the reviews are embarassingly poor, I don't think we'll have to worry about the issue for very long.

-TL

Strong Cough Medicine, Stonger Language
 

Parody or Satire?
 

This so-called parody contest does not involve parodies in the strictest sense -- but rather satire. cf. The Cat NOT in the Hat! A parody by "Dr. Juice"

Illiterati on the op-ed page.
 

"mustard" (muster [as in 'cutting the'])
"poor" "pore" and "pour"
"peaked" (piqued [as in 'one's interest has been'])
"compliment" (complement [misused both ways])
"corpse" (corps, though I quite like the press corpse)

Illiterati on the op-ed page.
 

And the ever popular

"loose" (lose -- as in, I hated to lose the game...) ;)

Illiterati on the op-ed page.
 

tack vs. tact (he's taking a different tact in these negotiations)

and the use of "till" in place of "until" or " 'til"

Illiterati on the op-ed page.
 

A magazine that came in the mail today (Menswear? With my name on the label? No idea why it came) had "peak" when they really meant "peek," as in a sneak peek at spring 2004 fashions. Ugh.

tm

Illiterati on the op-ed page.
 

Things that irk me:

Overheard at Neuschwanstein: an American tourist saying that Ludwig II and his doctor "drowned to death" in Lake Starnberg.

Other version: a lifeguard at a water park saying that a patron drowned, and when another patron said "I can't believe a person died on your watch," replying, "He didn't die, he just drowned."

And heard on TV: a person pronouncing height as height-th.

Finally, what is with the pervasive misuse (i.e., non-reflexive use) of myself and yourself? This really bugs myself.

Other people's selves do horrible things to the language.

Illiterati on the op-ed page.
 

Maybe they were wanting you to look at the "peak" in the mens underwear.

Illiterati on the op-ed page.
 

There is an added level of irritation for the "myself" thing -- because the people who do it are trying to sound "smarter" when what they sound is "not smarter".

(But, that's just myself's opinion.)

Illiterati on the op-ed page.
 

You and myself are in agreement on this one.

Where did this come from? I don't remember noticing the error 10 years ago. It's like some dumb jock started saying myself in interviews 10 years ago, and it's spread like wildfire.

Illiterati on the op-ed page.
 

you could stop there and annoyance/irksomeness could be presumed.

Although I'm surprised the typical tourist could haul his lardass up the stairs.

Illiterati on the op-ed page.
 

I get bothered when jocks use second person to describe their personal actual experience. "You see the forward coming out to guard you, so you pass inside."

You hear that on the TV and you think why doesn't he use first person.

"Rapping" Judge
 

Please tell me she didn't.

http://www.thisislondon.com/news/sho...ticles/7255059

(spree: Judge tries to be clever by "rapping" her dismissal of lawsuit against Eminem. Fails miserably: "'Mr Bailey complained his rep is trash, so he's seeking compensation in the form of cash.")

Attending school in Detroit does not automatically confer street cred.

http://www.co.macomb.mi.us/circuitcourt/formsdir/Judges'%20Bios/dasbio.htm

Illiterati on the op-ed page.
 

AAAGH! It's spreading to actual "authors" on a website I used to respect. From a Salon.com article by Jane Smiley

"(this couple in real life were not myself and my former husband, but two law students I knew)"

Not NTTAWWT.
 

My cringing favorite is the recurring reference in menus and recipes to a French dip sandwich served "with au jus" (or, as if that were not redundant enough, "with au jus broth").

NOT Not NTTAWWT
 

Double Negatives are a no no.

Not NTTAWWT.
 

From this week's Time Mag: Inside the New SAT Test

Although I wonder whether the writer and editors know it, this construction is no longer technically redundant. A few years ago, the College Board decided that the initials no longer stood for anything. This occurred after the A word was changed from "Aptitude" (raised too many self-esteem issues, and critics hated the suggestion that the test measured ability) to "Assessment" (which obviously still suggested that the test measured something). "Admission" would be an obvious choice, a la the LSAT, if not for the problematic S. Some would suggest Shitty, Suxass, or Socioeconomicallybiased, but that doesn't look good on the test booklet covers.

Big day for ESPN correspondent
 

From ESPN.com:

MIAMI -- Florida Marlins manager Jack McKeon hinted Thursday night that he might gamble and bring back ace Josh Beckett on three days' rest Saturday for Game 6 of the World Series. . . . ESPN's Pedro Gomez reported on Friday that Gomez will indeed get the ball for Game 6.

Big day for ESPN correspondent
 

Speaking of baseball, they showed a sign on TV during game 4:

"Diffuse the [picture of rocket]."

Argh!!!

tm