What ARE you people? On DOPE?
 

Because nobody's watching Boomtown, NBC is bumping it for the next three weeks. They say it will return somewhere on its prime time schedule, but they don't know where yet.

What the hell is wrong with everybody? Seriously? You can't get better scripted TV than Boomtown. Even the mistake of replacing Andrea Little with Vanessa Williams' character didn't seem to hurt the show too much - the first two episodes were great stuff.

Screw you guys, I'm going home.

str8

Pulling a Jessica
 

She became famous for being the person most mistaken to be Britney until she opens her mouth.

another announcement
 

That will be part of the pleasure of the toasts. You toast your Flower, I toast my Flower, let a thousand Flowers.... well, you know?

So what do you say, folks, do we give Flower a retirement party this Friday afternoon?

another announcement
 

As opposed to you with your announcement of your retirement (if he retired), prompting some gullible sad-sacks here to plea with you not to go. <insert hurling vomit smiley here>

On another note, I would bang you before Maria Shriver. She looked like she was exhumed last night -

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?g=e...s=&l=1&e=1&a=0 (news pic) and

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?g=e...=&l=1&e=32&a=0 (news pic)

<insert shudder with disgust smiley here>.

RSVP
 

You send out the invitations and here's the RSVP.

I will/will not be able to attend the Flower retirement party.

RSVP
 

I will not be able to attend the Flower retirement party as I will be too busy growing a skin (your own fault).

another announcement
 

Speaking of flowers, I would imagine that the bubbles in Britney's tummy smell like roses. As Jessica Simpson's tummy bubbles have no smell, this is how I've always told them apart.

http://www.esquire.com/women/gallery...ney_frame.html

(Britney pics and amusing quote; safe for work, although the picture is somewhat revealing)

Edited to add poll: Poll: would you rather fuck Britney or Jessica during PLF's retirement party?

Not Amused by Poll! Poll
 

Not if you live in New York City. Lots of hispanic kids named Angel. Many of whom never had to fight about it.

The name I don't understand is "Junior." And I don't mean Jr., as in JFK, jr. I mean the given name, Junior. I know I'm Wonking, but, anyone?

TM

Not Amused by Poll! Poll
 

WANKING.

Not Amused by Poll! Poll
 

Whiff.

It's a I-missed-the-joke-initially whiff, but a whiff all the same.

TM

another announcement
 

What's your favorite Flower post?

As I contemplated Irony, spinning hippie chicks and prancey kittys, really, too many jewels to count:

But what I am really here to talk about is our new war. Is it true that we are calling it "Operation Infinite Justice"? I hope so. I love that name! It has such a nice absurdist ring to it. I don't even know what it means for there to be infinite justice. Presumably, there are only a finite number of things that can be either just or unjust. So, the concept of infinite justice strikes me as fundamentally absurd - more justice than it is logically possible to have or achieve. For that, I send my kudos to the military. Besides, "Whole Lotta Justice" would have just sounded silly.

Infinite Flower


http://www.infirmation.com/bboard/cl...?msg_id=001BIB

[Other faves include his random "I hate you" flames and his whole "Yay!" period.]

Edited ot add: Hi! Flower!!! And in homage, tonight I will drink a secret toast to you.

another announcement
 

Most of us work in big law firms. We know that "retiring" doesn't necessarily mean a clean break. It doesn't necessarily mean that we won't see you regularly. No, it merely means that you move out of the big office and, for the most part, stop making others' lives miserable. It means rolling in around 10:30, only to grab the lobby copy of the Wall Street Journal and disappear into a men's room stall for an hour or so. Before you head into your new, smaller office, where you work on god-knows-what until it is time to go home and take a nap around 3. On occassion, you will be brought out to regale the summers with stories of the old days, when Yahoo sucked but Plate was funny.

Let me offer you the PacNW board as your new, smaller office. I'll even invest in one of those two-sided "partner's desks," so that you can share with Paigow. I can't stop Penske from popping in from time to time, but I can generally offer solitude and a place to escape the pressure that comes with the corner office we call the Fashion Board. So please, let me show you to your new office: http://www.lawtalkers.com/forums/for...?s=&forumid=32

alright I'll post a submission before someone steals my song
 

(unlikely)

Board Damage
(adapted from Brain Damage, Pink Floyd)

the lunatics all want her ass
the lunatics want e/o’s ass
tm plays games and daisy chains get laughs
got to keep on topic or risk her wrath

a lunatic shops at the mall
the lunatics buy clothes for fall
paigow points their wretched faces towards the door
but everyday the suburbs get one more

and if coltrane’s knees break down many years too soon
and if there is no lizard with a pill
and if PB explodes with Ahnold’s sex life too
I’ll see you on the FB with some ‘shrooms

the fashion board is in my head
fucking fashion board is in my head
leagl had it made, she made the change
she’ll re-arrange us or go insane

we mock some more
and socks pop up you’ll see
theres and thats may even bother dear RP

and if reality tv shows, moral relativism cause you fear
you’ll shout but no one seems to care
and if the board you’re on starts kayaking to different tunes
I’ll see you on the FB, get there soon…


[you'll have to do the whoas that accompany in your head, if it isn't already too 'shroom-addled]

another announcement
 

Have you been living under a pile of due diligence documents and wedding dress patterns? It was only "Operation Infinite Justice" for TWO WEEKS. And those two weeks were over TWO YEARS AGO. Now it is Operation Enduring Freedom. http://www.globalsecurity.org/milita...te-justice.htm

another announcement
 

Edited to add: I am an idiot for hitting reply instead of edit.