LawTalkers
Page 50 of 126 « First 404849 50 515260100 Last »
Show 40 post(s) from this thread on one page

LawTalkers (http://www.lawtalkers.com/forums/index.php)
-   The Fashionable (http://www.lawtalkers.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=14)
-   -   Making a buck cleaning Lester's spittle trays on Sequels' 22-year old supermodel abs (http://www.lawtalkers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=680)

Mister_Ruysbroeck 05-19-2005 11:35 AM
How embarrassing
 
Quote:
Originally posted by sunnybunny
Yeah, but you haven't even met me and I think based on photos you've said I was sexy or hot or pretty or something...so I bet you'd fuck me if I kept my mouth shut...and I'd also bet you wouldn't fuck Paigow with or without her mouth shut.
This one, I don't find hard to believe.

dtb 05-19-2005 11:39 AM
My date
 
Quote:
Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
Because I know you all are interested, I managed to keep my vow very easily last night and this is why.

Date was not very attractive - tall, not ugly, but strange habit of making a weird face once in a while. Also did not look me in the eye.

Conversation was painful. I was doing most of the question-asking and carrying the conversation. Then, he asked me what I like to do on the weekends. So I said that most weekends these days I box for several hours on Saturday morning and he says:

"Boxing? Really? that's so vulgar. Women shouldn't box. Especially pretty women that look like Audrey Hepburn. It's so vulgar."

So I just stared at him thinking wtf. And I said that I didn't think it was vulgar at all, and it's a lot of fun, and I enjoy it a lot and I'm into it.

Awkward silence.

Then he says, "So, you're from Canada?" and I asked him if he had ever been there. And he said that he had been to Mont-Tremblant, but it was so cold that he stayed in the hottub most of the time.

And by then I couldn't take it any more, and although I'm generally very sympathetic to people who don't like cold weather, I was pissed, so I said "hmm. Well, I'd much rather be vulgar than a big pussy who can't take the cold."

Then I said I had to go feed my cat. And I gave him $ for my drink and left.

That's 37 min of my life I'll never get back.
It must have been the chipped nail polish.

Live and learn.

ThurgreedMarshall 05-19-2005 11:44 AM
My date
 
Quote:
Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
Women shouldn't box. Especially pretty women that look like Audrey Hepburn."
Yeah. Like dtb would ever box.

Quote:
Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
I was pissed, so I said "hmm. Well, I'd much rather be vulgar than a big pussy who can't take the cold."

Then I said I had to go feed my cat. And I gave him $ for my drink and left.
You didn't feed your cat before you left for your date? That's just cruel.

And damn. I am impressed. That's some good shit.

TM

Mister_Ruysbroeck 05-19-2005 11:52 AM
My date
 
Quote:
Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
If I ever see him again, I'll kick him in the head.
Which one?

Replaced_Texan 05-19-2005 11:54 AM
anyone read this guy?
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
http://www.augusten.com/

the last few weeks I've been reading Augusten Burroughs. His early memoirs Running With Scissors is really good. He had a strange childhood, at least. Memoir of rehab Dry is less fun- perhaps because it hits close to home, but still a good read. Novel Sellevision light-fluff but pretty fun.
I've read Sellevision. I think they'er making it into a movie. I wasn't particularly blown away by it.

Replaced_Texan 05-19-2005 11:55 AM
Star Wars review
 
Yay!

lo-berry 05-19-2005 11:58 AM
How embarrassing
 
Quote:
Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
I don't drink coffee.

TM
Makes sense, coffee's for closers.

sebastian_dangerfield 05-19-2005 12:04 PM
How embarrassing
 
Quote:
Originally posted by dtb
I don't know about NotBob, but I know I did. Now that I know she's had many luv-ahs, I think I'm going to sue her.
Get in line. There's a claims process. You can find the submission bar date online.

In Re Philadelphia Tramp Litigation, USBC, EDPa, No. 00345-04.

sebastian_dangerfield 05-19-2005 12:10 PM
My date
 
Quote:
Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
Because I know you all are interested, I managed to keep my vow very easily last night and this is why.

Date was not very attractive - tall, not ugly, but strange habit of making a weird face once in a while. Also did not look me in the eye.

Conversation was painful. I was doing most of the question-asking and carrying the conversation. Then, he asked me what I like to do on the weekends. So I said that most weekends these days I box for several hours on Saturday morning and he says:

"Boxing? Really? that's so vulgar. Women shouldn't box. Especially pretty women that look like Audrey Hepburn. It's so vulgar."

So I just stared at him thinking wtf. And I said that I didn't think it was vulgar at all, and it's a lot of fun, and I enjoy it a lot and I'm into it.

Awkward silence.

Then he says, "So, you're from Canada?" and I asked him if he had ever been there. And he said that he had been to Mont-Tremblant, but it was so cold that he stayed in the hottub most of the time.

And by then I couldn't take it any more, and although I'm generally very sympathetic to people who don't like cold weather, I was pissed, so I said "hmm. Well, I'd much rather be vulgar than a big pussy who can't take the cold."

Then I said I had to go feed my cat. And I gave him $ for my drink and left.

That's 37 min of my life I'll never get back.
Congrats on cutting and running.

That is how you do it. No use in wasting time. I'd have tapped the bar three times and cried submission after the horrible Audrey Hepburn line. Thats godawful. Where the fuck do guys get that stupid shit? "If I compliment her on looking like a 60s starlet she may or may not recognize, within 15 min of meeting her - while backhandedly insulting her interests - I'm SURE to get laid!" How does such a douchebag survive in NYC? Don't answer that last one... I know. 90% of the world is douchebags.

greatwhitenorthchick 05-19-2005 12:14 PM
My date
 
Quote:
Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
90% of the world is douchebags.
That's why our salad dressing supply is never at risk.

And your thoughts are exactly what I was thinking. Fuck, I am one of the easy ones. This guy must never ever get laid.

pony_trekker 05-19-2005 12:15 PM
My date
 
Quote:
Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
Because I know you all are interested, I managed to keep my vow very easily last night and this is why.

Date was not very attractive - tall, not ugly, but strange habit of making a weird face once in a while. Also did not look me in the eye.

Conversation was painful. I was doing most of the question-asking and carrying the conversation. Then, he asked me what I like to do on the weekends. So I said that most weekends these days I box for several hours on Saturday morning and he says:

"Boxing? Really? that's so vulgar. Women shouldn't box. Especially pretty women that look like Audrey Hepburn. It's so vulgar."

So I just stared at him thinking wtf. And I said that I didn't think it was vulgar at all, and it's a lot of fun, and I enjoy it a lot and I'm into it.

Awkward silence.

Then he says, "So, you're from Canada?" and I asked him if he had ever been there. And he said that he had been to Mont-Tremblant, but it was so cold that he stayed in the hottub most of the time.

And by then I couldn't take it any more, and although I'm generally very sympathetic to people who don't like cold weather, I was pissed, so I said "hmm. Well, I'd much rather be vulgar than a big pussy who can't take the cold."

Then I said I had to go feed my cat. And I gave him $ for my drink and left.

That's 37 min of my life I'll never get back.
That guy works in my office. Here's a video tape of him.

Spree: non-vulgar, work safe funny video with sound.

robustpuppy 05-19-2005 12:23 PM
My date
 
Quote:
Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Congrats on cutting and running.

That is how you do it. No use in wasting time. I'd have tapped the bar three times and cried submission after the horrible Audrey Hepburn line. Thats godawful. Where the fuck do guys get that stupid shit? "If I compliment her on looking like a 60s starlet she may or may not recognize, within 15 min of meeting her - while backhandedly insulting her interests - I'm SURE to get laid!" How does such a douchebag survive in NYC? Don't answer that last one... I know. 90% of the world is douchebags.
Very right, and I hate to nitpick (well, I don't really hate it, and you know it's a sign of affection) or take you so fucking literally (wouldn't hate it, would be a sign of affection) except . . .

Audrey Hepburn is a "60s starlet [a woman] may or may not recognize"?

sebastian_dangerfield 05-19-2005 12:29 PM
My date
 
Quote:
Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
That's why our salad dressing supply is never at risk.

And your thoughts are exactly what I was thinking. Fuck, I am one of the easy ones. This guy must never ever get laid.
Even I learned long ago that if you want to get laid, bag the lines. They never work. I think douches like this cat forget that to get any, you have to connect, and to connect, you have to put away the facade. Its fucked up. People spend so much time try to figure out how to get laid, not realizing that its all the figuring and overthinking that sinks them every time. And why the fuck would you want to be with somebody whom you'd tricked into believeing you were something you're not? It makes no sense... entirely self-defeating right out of the gate.

RP - I type fast. The English, it suffers as a result.

ETA - Yes, this is my pompous post of the day.

Hank Chinaski 05-19-2005 12:33 PM
anyone read this guy?
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
I've read Sellevision. I think they'er making it into a movie. I wasn't particularly blown away by it.
try RWS. trust me.

Alex_de_Large 05-19-2005 12:50 PM
Star Wars review
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
Yay!
2.

Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) 05-19-2005 01:15 PM
My date
 
Quote:
Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick

That's 37 min of my life I'll never get back.
On the plus side, you'll have a good, heartwarming story of one night of celibacy for your grandnieces and -nephews.

notcasesensitive 05-19-2005 01:18 PM
anyone read this guy?
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
try RWS. trust me.
I've read Running With Scissors and Dry. I think I even posted about them here a year or more ago. First the SNL book, now this. I didn't realize how ahead of the curve I really am.

RWS was funnier than Dry, but for some reason while reading RWS I couldn't stop making the David Sederis comparison (Sederis is funnier, as you might have guessed) whereas with Dry it felt less like Burroughs was trying to compete with Sederis, so it rang more true to me. Or maybe it is because I've known a lot of alcoholics. He's supposed to be close to releasing his 3rd memoir. About his relationship with his father.


ETA links to places where I invented this discussion. Because I'm feeling a bit snarky today.

http://www.lawtalkers.com/forums/sho...1202#post11202

http://www.lawtalkers.com/forums/sho...395#post111395

Look at that. I was feeling snarky on 7-22-2004 also. Maybe it's a trend.


EFTA crap, outed again as a person Hank has on ignore!

dtb 05-19-2005 01:18 PM
My date
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
On the plus side, you'll have a good, heartwarming story of one night of celibacy for your grandnieces and -nephews.
And wholesome. Don't forget wholesome.

ltl/fb 05-19-2005 01:21 PM
My date
 
Quote:
Originally posted by dtb
And wholesome. Don't forget wholesome.
I dunno. Is vulgarity really wholesome?

Hank Chinaski 05-19-2005 01:25 PM
anyone read this guy?
 
Quote:
Originally posted by notcasesensitive
I've read Running With Scissors and Dry. I think I even posted about them here a year or more ago. First the SNL book, now this. I didn't realize how ahead of the curve I really am.

RWS was funnier than Dry, but for some reason while reading RWS I couldn't stop making the David Sederis comparison (Sederis is funnier, as you might have guessed) whereas with Dry it felt less like Burroughs was trying to compete with Sederis, so it rang more true to me. Or maybe it is because I've known a lot of alcoholics. He's supposed to be close to releasing his 3rd memoir. About his relationship with his father.


ETA links to places where I invented this discussion. Because I'm feeling a bit snarky today.

http://www.lawtalkers.com/forums/sho...1202#post11202


http://www.lawtalkers.com/forums/sho...395#post111395

Look at that. I was feeling snarky on 7-22-2004 also. Maybe it's a trend.


EFTA crap, outed again as a person Hank has on ignore!
Who did loberry say was most pathetic?

robustpuppy 05-19-2005 01:25 PM
My date
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
On the plus side, you'll have a good, heartwarming story of one night of celibacy for your grandnieces and -nephews.
"Auntie Gwink, how do I know that when I grow up, I'll have the strength not to fuck an odious, unattractive weenie who hates the cold?"

notcasesensitive 05-19-2005 01:34 PM
anyone read this guy?
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
Who did loberry say was most pathetic?
Hank?

Bad_Rich_Chic 05-19-2005 01:41 PM
Avatar for Nut Case, Sensitive
 
Quote:
Originally posted by notcasesensitive
PS. Hot chocolate combined with mint tea is unusual, but not bad. Mint hot chocolate.
Hot chocolate spiked with peppermint schnapps. Pretty tasty. And a good way to get rid of peppermint schnapps.

BR(went through a phase where, for no apparent reason, people started randomly bringing us peppermint schnapps. We had three huge bottles of it at one point. We still wonder what they were getting at.)C

dtb 05-19-2005 01:51 PM
anyone read this guy?
 
Quote:
Originally posted by notcasesensitive
I've read Running With Scissors and Dry. I think I even posted about them here a year or more ago. First the SNL book, now this. I didn't realize how ahead of the curve I really am.

RWS was funnier than Dry, but for some reason while reading RWS I couldn't stop making the David Sederis comparison (Sederis is funnier, as you might have guessed) whereas with Dry it felt less like Burroughs was trying to compete with Sederis, so it rang more true to me. Or maybe it is because I've known a lot of alcoholics. He's supposed to be close to releasing his 3rd memoir. About his relationship with his father.
I went to a Barnes & Noble booksigning in Union Square last year to meet him (well, to see him sign books and stuff -- we didn't actually meet). He's hot.

robustpuppy 05-19-2005 01:59 PM
Avatar for Nut Case, Sensitive
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Bad_Rich_Chic
Hot chocolate spiked with peppermint schnapps. Pretty tasty. And a good way to get rid of peppermint schnapps.

BR(went through a phase where, for no apparent reason, people started randomly bringing us peppermint schnapps. We had three huge bottles of it at one point. We still wonder what they were getting at.)C
The only interpretation that makes any sense is that they don't like you.

barely_legal 05-19-2005 02:05 PM
Avatar for Nut Case, Sensitive
 
Quote:
Originally posted by robustpuppy
The only interpretation that makes any sense is that they don't like you.
Or that they have stinky breath.

Not Bob 05-19-2005 02:08 PM
I am just a poor boy though my story's seldom told
 
Quote:
Originally posted by robustpuppy
The only interpretation that makes any sense is that they don't like you.
Nonsense. Everyone loves BRC.

Gwnc, I'm sorry to hear about your date. I feel personally responsible. I told Nigel to use the "Audrey Hepburn" line (sebby, not all of us are blessed with your savoir faire when it comes to the chicks, and we need an something to fall back on when we get tongue-tied), but I didn't realize that he would manage to slam your hobby while doing so.

At least I persuaded him not to talk about his GI Joe collection.(Uh, right?)

Hank Chinaski 05-19-2005 02:08 PM
anyone read this guy?
 
Quote:
Originally posted by notcasesensitive
Hank?
this type personal attack is simply vulgar.

Hank Chinaski 05-19-2005 02:11 PM
anyone read this guy?
 
Quote:
Originally posted by dtb
I went to a Barnes & Noble booksigning in Union Square last year to meet him (well, to see him sign books and stuff -- we didn't actually meet). He's hot.
Of course. How could one possibly make a Sedaris connection- all gays writers are the same?

Me Talk Pretty One Day has the obvious tie to Wilde, but its not about a painting as much?

notcasesensitive 05-19-2005 02:14 PM
anyone read this guy?
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
this type personal attack is simply vulgar.
I am both vulgar and wimpy when it comes to the cold. I cannot bring myself to say that I'm a big pussy though. I guess you'd have to ask Mr Man about that.

notcasesensitive 05-19-2005 02:16 PM
anyone read this guy?
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
Of course. How could one possibly make a Sedaris connection- all gays writers are the same?
Not the same. DS seems to be willing to take it in the ass.

That was a bit vulgar wasn't it?

Oliver_Wendell_Ramone 05-19-2005 02:19 PM
Avatar for Nut Case, Sensitive
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Bad_Rich_Chic
Hot chocolate spiked with peppermint schnapps. Pretty tasty. And a good way to get rid of peppermint schnapps.

BR(went through a phase where, for no apparent reason, people started randomly bringing us peppermint schnapps. We had three huge bottles of it at one point. We still wonder what they were getting at.)C
A proper host knows that it is considered good manners to have an unopened bottle of peppermint schnapps on hand for guests, in the event that guests should like to freshen up after eating the host's ass.

greatwhitenorthchick 05-19-2005 02:20 PM
anyone read this guy?
 
Quote:
Originally posted by notcasesensitive
That was a bit vulgar wasn't it?
Yes. Well done. From there it is only a short distance to punching and kicking people in the head. Yay!

Oliver_Wendell_Ramone 05-19-2005 02:20 PM
anyone read this guy?
 
Quote:
Originally posted by notcasesensitive
Not the same. DS seems to be willing to take it in the ass.

That was a bit vulgar wasn't it?
Not vulgar at all. DebtSlave's anal fetish is something of an old skool legend, after all.

sebastian_dangerfield 05-19-2005 02:21 PM
I am just a poor boy though my story's seldom told
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Not Bob
Nonsense. Everyone loves BRC.

Gwnc, I'm sorry to hear about your date. I feel personally responsible. I told Nigel to use the "Audrey Hepburn" line (sebby, not all of us are blessed with your savoir faire when it comes to the chicks, and we need an something to fall back on when we get tongue-tied), but I didn't realize that he would manage to slam your hobby while doing so.

At least I persuaded him not to talk about his GI Joe collection.(Uh, right?)
Dude, Audrey Hepburn? She's been dead longer than the average Starbucks latte jockey has been alive. What would you think if a chick told you you looked like James Dean? I'd check to see if she was wearing a girdle. Audrey Hepburn's a sex star to the false teeth set.

The safest place to put a restless tongue is your drink.

Oliver_Wendell_Ramone 05-19-2005 02:22 PM
I am just a poor boy though my story's seldom told
 
Quote:
Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield

The safest place to put a restless tongue is your drink.
Tell that to MR.

greatwhitenorthchick 05-19-2005 02:25 PM
I am just a poor boy though my story's seldom told
 
Quote:
Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Dude, Audrey Hepburn? She's been dead longer than the average Starbucks latte jockey has been alive. What would you think if a chick told you you looked like James Dean? I'd check to see if she was wearing a girdle. Audrey Hepburn's a sex star to the false teeth set.

The safest place to put a restless tongue is your drink.
Actually, Sebby, I get Audrey Hepburn now and then. and Mia Farrow, and Nicole Kidman, esp around that time that movie came out when she wore the short wig. I used to get Darryl Hannah in the 80s, but no longer. Out of all of them, I would take Audrey Hepburn as the biggest compliment.


Translation: I'm extraordinarily hot

Hank Chinaski 05-19-2005 02:26 PM
anyone read this guy?
 
aaarrrrghhh

sebastian_dangerfield 05-19-2005 02:27 PM
Avatar for Nut Case, Sensitive
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Oliver_Wendell_Ramone
A proper host knows that it is considered good manners to have an unopened bottle of peppermint schnapps on hand for guests, in the event that guests should like to freshen up after eating the host's ass.
I hope you keep that bottle hidden away from the drinkable liquor you serve to guests. Results could be disastrous if there is any 'backwash'.

"Hmmm, I didn't know Rumplemintz had flecks in it... I thought that was Goldschlager... Think I'll take a swig...."

Hank Chinaski 05-19-2005 02:29 PM
I am just a poor boy though my story's seldom told
 
Quote:
Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Dude, Audrey Hepburn? She's been dead longer than the average Starbucks latte jockey has been alive. What would you think if a chick told you you looked like James Dean? I'd check to see if she was wearing a girdle. Audrey Hepburn's a sex star to the false teeth set.

The safest place to put a restless tongue is your drink.
Breakfast at Tiffany's is one of the 10 best movies ever made. And she was stunning in it.


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 05:01 PM.
Page 50 of 126 « First 404849 50 515260100 Last »
Show 40 post(s) from this thread on one page

Powered by: vBulletin, Copyright ©2000 - 2008, Jelsoft Enterprises Limited.
Hosted By: URLJet.com