Where is the Dead Horse
 

when you need him? Maybe his swayback has been completely broken.

I will even offer another subject. Anyone see this band "Boomcat" on the Tonight show last night? What the fuck was that? This anorexic girl with a screechy, nasal voice that wouldn't even get to go to LA on American Idol was singing some atrocious song I had never heard. After having a great performance by India.Arie the night before, if I was Jay Leno, I would have just stayed in my chair and fired my booker on screen. Unfortunately, upon switching to Letterman, I found Todd Rundgren doing what appeared to be an intentionally kitchy, lounge version of "Hello, It's Me." If if wasn't intentionally bad, Dave's booker should be not just fired, but summarily executed.

Tofutti
 

Wait a minute. Are you "going to lunch" with Mr. Kiss too? Fuck!!!!

Dad's Day
 

With Dad's Day fast approaching, does anyone have any brilliantly creative ideas? Preferably ones that do not involve aftershave or crappy gift certificates. Dad is impossible to shop for -- anything he wants he buys which leaves nothing for the rest of us to gift with. What will you be gifting to your dad?

Please, no vanilla sex references -- this is my dad for freaks sake.

Where is the Dead Horse
 

Yeah, I saw that last night. What the hell was that? I stayed up because I love "Hello it's me" and I knew it would be less than I expected, but that was just downright weird. It's hard to describe, but it's like he took singing lessons over the last 30 years and forgot what the original sounded like. Way too much vibrato and stylizing. On the other hand, Paul Schaefer rocks on piano - I wish I played half as good.

On another note - fuck the Mets. And fuck Art Howe. And fuck any league that doesn't have a designated hitter.:dance2:

There are worse things ...
 

It wouldn't hurt so much if she banged it on the wads of cash instead.

Vanilla - poll
 

:grinning:

Now, on this whole "vanilla" thing, cut it out. I like vanilla. Vanilla can be a wonderfully subtle treat. As with anything, there is good vanilla and bad vanilla, and good vanilla is super, perhaps superior to its flashier cousins. There is bad chocolate, and bad mint chip, too, but it is vanilla that always gets brought in for a drubbing. Hmmph.

So, on the other, I am curious - what activities do people (individuals) consider vani - oops, wonderbread?

Me:

Wonderbread:
missionary
chick on top
doggy
standing
floor
most furniture
cars
manual
oral
69
vouyerism (sp? whatever)
spanking
blindfold
light restraints
costumes/mild role playing
talking dirty
most electronic toys (vibrators)
food - external use or traditional vegetables
massage & exotic or edible oils
sex on pot, X or coke
one night stands
hiring a female prostitute (if male)

Non-Wonderbread:
animals (but larger livestock may be wonderbread, as may be tricks with dogs and spreadable food)
children
public
bondage (real bondage)
role-playing "intruder/rapist"
S&M
dom
food - internal use (other than the usual phallic vegetables)
custom made furniture (swings, see "S&M" and "bondage" above)
strap-ons (but maybe I'm wrong)
sex while tweaking or on heroin or halucinogens (I understand that isn't very easy, but I have a friend who loved having sex on acid until it all went horribly, horribly wrong one night)
orgies
sex with strangers
hiring a male prostitute (if female)

In between:
3 somes. I know it happens a fair amount, but ... it just seems all exotic and complicated to me. Or maybe it's really unusual and I've just met too many wild and crazy people.

BR(and no badmouthing vanilla)C

edited because I caught myself using "vanilla" perjoratively - sheesh!

Vanilla
 

Can this really be done? I've never seen gwinky naked, but ice cream is cold.

Vanilla - poll
 

This list reminds me of an old South Park episode where Mr. Garrison teaches sex ed to kindergartners, including such terms as "dirty sanchez" and other terms I had never heard and the OM was loath to define.

So, is "car" a position or a location?

Even(vroom-vroom)Odds

Vanilla - poll
 

"So what happened?"
"She's into it."
"Into what?"
"The menage. And not only that. She just called me and said she talked to the roommate and the roommate's into the menage too."
"That's unbelievable."
"Oh, it's a scene man."
"Do you ever just get down on your knees and thank god that you know me and have access to my dementia?"
"What are you talking about? I'm not goin' to do it."
"You're not goin to do it? What do you mean, You're not goin to do it?"
"I can't. I'm not an orgy guy."
"Are you crazy? This is like discovering Plutonium ... by accident."
"Don't you know what it means to become an orgy guy? It changes everything. I'd have to dress different. I'd have to act different. I'd have to grow a moustache and get all kinds of robes and lotions and I'd need a new bedspread and new curtains I'd have to get thick carpeting and weirdo lighting. I'd have to get new friends. I'd have to get orgy friends. ... Naw, I'm not ready for it.
"If only something like that could happen to me."
"Oh, shut up you couldn't do it either."
"I know."

Vanilla - poll
 

So, BRC, are you doing much of the stuff on your Non-wonderbread list? I'll agree that all that stuff is non-wonderbread. I note that you left anal off (after all this discussion, none-the-less!). I assume it is wonderbread. Also where is sex on speed on your list?

The Washington Post is so behind the FB
 

Spree: article about unhappy Trading Spaces homeowners.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn...ml?nav=hptoc_c

Vanilla - poll
 

This whole discussion, while dead-horse like, has been somewhat interesting to me. I have had sex with men from all walks of life from hair band musicians to athletes to video store clerks to students to pothead layabouts to career criminals to professors etc., but I have never really dated anyone who suggested anything in your second list. If anyone ever suggested anything verging on your second list, it was me, and it was usually met with a look of horror or shock that a sweet thing like me would suggest such a thing, followed by bad sex and a break up shortly thereafter. It makes a girl start to shut up about that kind of thing.

I think I attract a certain kind of man that thinks for whatever reason that I am not the kind of person to cross certain lines. It is probably why I married my husband - along with all the other good stuff, he did not seem to have a prejudged idea of me (not that I am in any way suggesting that we have had sex with children or animals or anything else on DS' perverted list).

P.S. I am glad you switched back avatars - I like the Lisa Marie one better (at least I think that is the actress, no?)

Vanilla - poll
 

And would the car be "public?" If so, I guess I am now non-wonderbread and all of you have become wonderbread apparently making me not the fucking prude everyone thought. Look what you people have done -- turned a sweet innocent little hockey fan into a sexual fucking deviant. :eek:

Vanilla - poll
 

Yeah, if the car's parked in your garage, it really doesn't mean much except that you want to have sex in a really uncomfortable environment. (For that matter, what furniture (other than sex-toy furniture) is not vanilla?)

And where's the sex in voyeurism? Are we talking watching your wife/hubby do it with a third-party, or are we talking about peeping in the neighbor's window? Or is it letting a third-party watch you and other? Which is really just sex in public, and should be called exhibitionism.

Also, I don't see how sex on drugs (of any type) is vanilla or not. Sex is sex; drugs are drugs. If you're taking a particular drug, the question is how hard-core of a user you are, not whether you're in to non-"mainstream" sex. Unless we're getting into a debate of the vanilla-ness of drugs. E.g., pot is vanilla, X and coke are strawberry, and the rest are chocolate.

Vanilla - poll
 

no, it's wonderbread -- see the list. non-wonderbread to DS does scare me a little too...