Marty snubbed, yet again.
 

Raging Bull lost Picture and Director to the forgettable film Ordinary People directed by Warren - er, Robert Redford

Goodfellas lost Picture and Director to the more-forgettable film Dances with Wolves directed by Kevin Costner

And now, Marty loses to Clint Eastwood.*

Do you see a pattern here? Marty always gets bounced by a Hollywood insider.

I can see the headlines now in 2007: "Martin Scorcese loses Oscar again; Ashton Kusher - in his directorial debut - gets top award for his big screen version of Punk'd"



* Who won this award more for last year's Mystic River, when he lost because of Peter Jackson's LOTR "body of work" award.

Oscar Roundup
 

So she could get a wardrobe workout, of course.

Pictures from the red carpet.

OK, when Beyonce sang the Phantom of the Opera song, was the idea of that get up that the chandelier from the end of the first act fell on her head? 'Cause I've got dinner plates smaller than her earrings. The best dress she had on all night was the black velvet she wore on the runway. And, incidentally, Josh Brolin has a damn good voice - if he had a bit of Beyonce's musical style he could really do something with that. That said, their voices blended more nicely than I would have guessed, and the dress she wore during that duet made her look twice as wide as him.

Spike Lee could have pulled the rest off if he lost the idiotic fez.

Robin Williams looked like a clown. Since he is a clown (literally), that's OK. Johnny Depp also looked like a clown, and that's not OK. His chicky, Frenchy what's her name, looked better (i.e.: less horrible) than I've seen her look in years.

Jamie Foxx needs a good slap for (i) recyling the same speech 50 times and (ii) wearing whatever the hell awful get up he was wearing. He's not a college basketball player about to go pro, he shouldn't dress like one. His daughter was pretty cute, though.

Jeremy Irons in a mandarin collar shirt? He looked like a dufus.

Now, Don Cheadle looked good. I also quite liked his wife's dress - interesting, and it looked great on her. He should have won best actor, IMHO.

Mike Meyers's hair. I just don't know what to say. I think I'm so used to seeing him in costumes that I see everything as a costume, and this was his beatles costume. And I've come to assume that the Austin Powers color is his real hair color, and it's not, it's darker, which I then automatically think of as a dark wig. But, if you look at his hair objectively, the haircut actually does flatter him - made his face almost handsome. So I don't know what to think.

I still don't know what to think of Clive Owen's tie. I'm sort of irrationally inclined to like it.

I thought Chris Rock looked great. (I like velevet suits, what can I say. ) His atelier, Puffy Da Da or whatever he's called this year, did not look as good. The seaming over the arms of his jacket was a good idea that didn't work. Nice to know he gave his best stuff to his customers, eh?

I still can't quite bring myself to really like Hilary Swank's dress. I like it in the abstract, a lot, God knows she had the figure for it, but something was weird about the shoulder seams that made it look like it was on backwards (I know the collar was doing that anyway, but the fucked up shoulder seaming made it look like it wasn't on purpose). And, she needed to warm up the lipstick. She looked like a corpse with the purplish undertones in that nude. Softer hair would have helped, 'cause she's so bony and severe anyway, but simply a bit of a peachy nude would have been sufficient to save the look. Best thing to happen to Guy LaRoche in years, though.

Selma Hayek looked lovely but her dress was as boring and conventional as an insurance brokerage convention. Yawn. And get your hair out of your eyes.

Gisele's dress. Well, she can pull it off. Those empire dresses looked better on the Dior runway, though.

I wasn't impressed with the Maria Full of Grace actress's dress. It flattered her figure, at least.

What the fuck happened to Melanie Griffiths? She had a head transplant. And Antonio should sue her surgeon, because her upper lip is so fat it looks like he's been beating her like a drum.

Thank god for the old men. They still know what black tie is supposed to look like. Compared to the other horrors, I'll even forgive Clint the green tie.

Italian chick who won for best art direction for the Aviator had the best dress on of the night, bar none. Of course, because she's just some nobody with actual talent and dress sense, I can't find a picture. And what was up with the fucking insulting "you're just some ugly person up for some technical award, so we're going to stuff you in the back row, and no one wants to see your ugly unimportant ass on stage or wait for you to wander up there so we're just going to present your award in the aisle" bullshit? Fuck that. Let me repeat: fuck that. Those are the people who actually make the movies, assholes. Show some fucking humility in the face of actual craft, skill and ability.

Charlotte Johannsen may get my nod for second best dressed. The bodice of that dress was fabulous. Kirsten Dunst also looked really, really good. Nice to see some real boobs out there.

Halle berry looked great. Not a show stoppingly brilliant gown, but it was lovely, not boring, and looked great on her.

Zhang Ziyi also had on a mercifully unboring and very pretty dress. Who says black is basic?

Annette Benning, that's who. Her dress was black, boring and matronly. Blah.

Laura Liney's dress was really good, but something didn't work - her hair or makeup, not sure. It needed to be softer.

Natalie Portman's dress was very interesting and lovely, but the color was so blah. Blah, blah, neutral blah. I don't like this taupe thing.

Drew Barrymore looked surprisingly good with auburn hair, but her dress was boring. Pretty, but boring. Brooch on the back didn't save it.

Kate Blanchet's dress was wonderful. It would have looked better on her were she brunette, but it was an amazing dress nevertheless.

Star Jones is a fucking joke.

Renee Z's dress was good in the abstract (and it did look excellent on stage, if not on the carpet), but it was pulled so tight she had back fat. SHE had back fat. I'm shocked she didn't pass out. Did anyone else notice how hilariously mini she was standing next to the Stock Oscar Carrying Glamazon after presenting her award? The SOCG was about a foot taller than her, and looked like she outweighed RZ by 50 pounds, all of it curves. I have to admit I sort of like her better as a brunette, though.

Emmy Rossum's dress didn't appear to fit at all. Renee Z. did this look better.

Maggie Gyllenhal's dress just didn't work.

Charlize Theron looked 200% better than she did last year. Gwynneth Paltrow looked good, too, though the dress didn't have a smooth transition from waist through hips. Why do they all get those dresses cut so fucking tight?

Kate Winslett's at least fit her. Pretty but boring, except for the color. The color is almost enough to rescue the boring conventionality of the rest of the dress.

I actually liked Prince's suit. Pity he didn't learn to pronounce anyone's name.

why does Julia Roberts walk like a linebacker?

OSCAR
 

1. Chris Rock was disappointing. He had a couple of good bits, but I really thought he was going to make it different somehow. A mainstream-Chris Rock is about as entertaining as Head of State.

2. Someone should remove the stick from Sean Penn's ass. Who cares how great an actor Jude Law is, the joke was funny. Lighten the fuck up.

3. Sidney Lumet. Yeah, whatever. Sidney Lumet's breasticle cheering section? Bravo. Encore. And holy shit.

4. Renee Zelwegger. Someone tell her that her look of constipation is not cute. It never was cute. And she's a shitty actress, too pale and too fucking skinny.

5. Salma Hayek is fucking hot. Seems to be dumb as bricks, but who cares?

6. Beyonce Knowles? Why the hell can't the people who sang the songs so well that they were nominated sing them at the Oscars? Whose idea was it to slather all that eye makeup on her? Her dress and those birthin' hips don't mix.

7. Morgan Freeman. Congratulations. And they say Samuel L. Jackson is cool. I say, bullshit. He can't fuck with Morgan.

8. Who thought I'd be rooting against a black man to win? Yet, there I was, hoping Foxx would lose to Cheadle. Cheadle and Hotel Rwanda were fucking robbed.

9. Was there a tsunami recently? I guess it was too poorly timed for anyone to give a shit about it anymore.

10. I thought The Next Karate Kid looked great. Her speech sucked. Her breasts are perfect. Her dress looked good.

11. Halle Berry. What can I say? She is perfect.

http://www.style.com/slideshows/part...5OSCAR/13f.jpg

TM

Marty snubbed, yet again.
 

Ordinary People was directed by a different pretty boy, Robert Redford.

Oscar Roundup
 

http://movies.yahoo.com/shop?d=he&id...0&cf=oscars_mm

http://movies.yahoo.com/shop?d=he&id...9&cf=oscars_mm

Picture jackpots.

Incidentally, Alan Alda's daughter (or granddaugher, or whoever she was) got hit with the ugly stick.

And Hellen Mirren looked fabulous.

I didn't see it during the broadcast, but the dress on the wife of the guy who did Million Dollar Baby's screenplay was superb.

Marty snubbed, yet again.
 

Right. Thanks.

OSCAR
 

Leave the hottie alone. She barely speaks English.

http://us.movies1.yimg.com/movies.ya...yek/oscars.jpg

Marty snubbed, yet again.
 

A sunnier bunny might note that it was the best movie about Howard Hughes since Melvin and Howard in 1980.

OSCAR
 

Yes. But it gave Rock the opportunity for the comeback line of the night..."my accountants would like to speak with you."
That was good.

Selma Hayek - blech. And yes, hair out of the eyes please.
Too much Beyonce.
But I liked Josh Grobin. They sounded good together, but she was just a tiny bit over-miked. He's the voice, she's the accompaniment.

OSCAR
 

OK. THIS is the dumbest fucking thing you've ever written.

OSCAR
 

What's with all the mermaid style dresses this year? That cut flatters no one who has hips.

OSCAR
 

You're not even close. I've written stupider things. Ask Ollie.
Are you saying they didn't sound good together or that Josh Grobin is not the voice.

OSCAR
 

I agree. I don't like it at all. I don't really think that style flatters anyone, like capri pants and tapered pants don't flatter anyone. Just some can pull it off better than others.

OSCAR
 

http://us.movies1.yimg.com/movies.ya..._banderas6.jpg
Um.

OSCAR
 

I'm a Beyonce fan, and I don't think I've ever heard of Josh Grobin before.

I don't think they went well together, and I certainly don't think that his voice was superior to hers.