Fats
 

They were smart to segregate out the photos.

Fats
 

Too bad. Before you could get to the photos, but it looks like we're locked out. My wife and son were at a Hotel in Cherry Hill where the convention was a few years back. They pointed me to the site, and we could talk about the people they were seeing live.

Maybe fringe has a password?

Fats
 

Did you see the stuff on there. It's enough to kill most FBers. The scariest thing to me was there air travel tips:

http://www.naafa.org/documents/brochures/airtips.html

Do we really want anyone encouraging the fats to sit in exit rows? And I like how it gives them tips on what to do if during meal time if they are too fat to put down the tray. Of course it's not encouraging them to skip a meal or anything.

Fats
 

I always like it when I can bring my wife and kids along with me to conventions, too.

Fats
 

Is there anything inthere about when the fats monopolize the lazboy when visiting the Rimmers?

Fats
 

I sat next to a guy who could not get his tray down. Fortunately unlike a lot of really huge people, this guy took a shower and didn't smell like a homeless guy. Anyway, he politely asked if he could use my tray to set his drink down. It was OK, as long as he wasn't eating. Anyway, poor bastard was in the middle seat and gave me such a crick in my neck, because I was in the window seat and had to lean the whole time due to spill-over.

Newflash - Hershey's kisses. New flavor? Not sure, have never seen them before. They're called Double Fudge and I highly recommend them. They are very fragrant and taste chocolatey.

Mmmmmm.

Football news
 

Vinny Testaverde will not go away.

Quincy Carter cut by the Cowboys leaving Vinny to be starting QB.
I can't tell you how much I hate Vinny. Apparently Carter will join Ricky in the "I'd rather smoke pot than play football" bunch.

Slow Day Poll
 

I will never, ever travel to see my family or any part thereof without having my own car.

Slow Day Poll
 

my word. look at that post count! I will never regain my throne as the Mother of All Posters


In unrelated requests, Rimmmer? You out there? Could you post some more entertaining anecdotes about your homelife?

Friday Ramblings
 

I don't know this story, and am similarly curious -- hey, if I scroll down, maybe I'll find someone posted it last week -- and read last weekend that her brother is one of Kerry's closest advisors.

Friday Ramblings
 

Observations from a bit of a distance: Nice woman, but on the dull side. One of those reasonably smart people who just is a little too wrapped up in something going on inside her head to bother with the world. My general impression is they both lost interest somewhere along the way; I can't vouch for how strong the interest was in the first place. Maybe she seemed enigmatic at first.

Slow Day Poll
 

Mostly correct, I'd say.

Friday Ramblings
 

Oh, great. If Kerry is elected and appoints some dude named Thorne as Ambassador to the Court of St. James, I'll be worried. But if that Ambassador then proceeds to have a son named Damien, that shit is fucked up and I am outta here. You'll find me holed up in a Residence Inn with pages from the Bible taped to the walls.

Slow Day Poll
 

Oh well I could have told you that. You should have asked. ALWAYS RENT A CAR. Otherwise you'll have to beg the grandparents to let you use the Ford LTD which hasn't gone more than 8 miles round trip since the early 80s, or in a fate worse than death they'll offer to drive you. And if you do actually get to drive the car, don't forget to put gas in it because grandpa will check the mileage to make sure you haven't gone on a frolic and detour.

Ramblings
 

Too bad "Don't Blame Me, I Voted For the Guy Who's Not the Former Brother-in-law of the AntiChrist's Father" is too unwieldy for a bumper sticker...

I voted for Kerry for you Damien... FOR YOU!!

Tigger gets off...
 

No, not like that you sickos...

Disney worker acquitted of fondling...

Things I miss from the oldschool days
 

1) Count's really fruity polls. (does anybody remember when he asked us to all describe kisses that made our toes curl?)

2) circa dragon. he was the hottest poster who I had no idea what he looked like

The Constitution
 

Even though I hated Con Law and spent most days not paying attention - this makes total sense.

SEATTLE - Gay couples can be married under Washington state law, because denying their right to do so is a violation of their constitutional rights, a judge ruled Wednesday.

"The denial to the plaintiffs of the right to marry constitutes a denial of substantive due process," King County Superior Court Judge William L. Downing said in his ruling.

"Judge Downing saw the couples in the courtroom and he's recognized that they are full and equal citizens of Washington. No more and no less," Pizer said.

http://www.katu.com/team2/story.asp?ID=69827

Friday Ramblings
 

At first they loved each other, then they decided they didn't?

Fats
 

no.
Mr.'s fats are to NAAFA members as AG is to the pope. They may be fat, but they aren't NAAFA fat. NAAFA fats, he couldn't expect to do anything- it is clear upon seeing them they can't.

Things I miss from the oldschool days
 

Golly gosh gee whiz Paigs, thanks for the mammaries….er…memories. The Count, indeed, that old sod, he still owes me money or some metal furniture (old skool joke)

Anywhichway, for y’alls info, in exactly 14 hours, give or take a couple of minutes, I will celebrate my 9th year of posting on greedy associate internet chatting boards.

Given that I am 45 years old, that means……OMFG…..I have been digging this scene for one fifth of my adult life!! Holy cannoli! That’s almost 25%!!!

OTOH, imagine if I was like young Master Coltrane, who rumour has it joined this board at the age of 19. When his 9th anniversary comes, npi, he will have been here well over a third of his natural life!!!!

Given my longevity and impeccable old skool cred, its odd that I no longer know any of the board’s contemporaneous members personally! IRL, iykwim. Given my consistent presence, I should know some, I would suppose……..

OTOH, this whole internet style chatting board phenomenon is a constant mystery, ever evolving, kinda weird. One generation passes the torch to another, so to speak and over time I forget more and more about the original Prodigy.Net crew and their descendants on Yahoo. And this place is a whole new FB compared with Chef’s era on the Infirmation Nation. New members swarm and the old ones move on. Partnership, GC positions, kids, trophy wives, no time.

I guess my point is that notwithstanding all that, and as different as this place feels to an old skool diva like me, its nice to know that there are still fellow old skoolers like Paigs (or is it Jenna J?!? LOL!!!-old skool joke alert) and Lessinmengele (or something like that) (old skool joke alert) that I "know" and that I'm still talking with on a cybercomm basis over the internet in the land of the worldwideweb.

cheers!

Friday Ramblings
 

I'm speculating here, but it could be that one or two posters on Politics wouldn't be that surprised if the above happened regardless of who wins in November.

p.s.: Good call. (Revelations 22:10)

Friday Ramblings
 

Whatever happened to taking responsibility for the effects that your chosen candidate reaps?

Good morning!
 

It's another hot one here in TX. Why oh why oh why do I live here?

touchy feely tigger
 

Scotish Goofy was frisky with me when I was 16 and visiting Disney World. I never thought to sue though. Actually, like most 16-year-old girls, I found it flattering. I think I was even blushing in the picture I have with him/her (I always suspected it was a woman under the costume).

touchy feely tigger
 

I wanted to grope Jasmine, but I restained myself. Of the Princesses she is by far the hottest. I'm not talking the cartoons, I mean the flesh and blood walking around Disney. Belle, Cinderella pretty sure, but Jasmine's costume makes all the difference.

touchy feely tigger
 

I got a hand job from a giant penguin at a friend's high school graduation.

No wait, that was Chris Farley in "Billy Madison"...

Fats
 

This is the worst advice:

I fucking hate it when some stranger has the armrest up and thinks that I will sit down next to him/her. I don't care what the reason is for putting it up. I don't like people enough to put up with some person I don't know touching me (except Goofy, of course... if you read these boards, Goofy, PM me!). I don't consider myself particularly fattist, but I firmly believe that if you can't fit into your seat on an airplane, you should buy yourself a second seat. If you can't afford it, I'm sorry, but I bought the right to all of the space on and in front of my seat.

And for fuck's sake, If I'm crammed in the middle seat, someone let me use a fucking armrest. I hate it when the windows and aisles take up two each.

Fats
 

I must have the best luck when flying. I'm never next to the fattie or the screaming baby or in the middle seat (knock on wood). This is probably a good thing, b/c I'm not sure I could restrain myself from saying something. Especially if the armrest is up. I'm putting that fucker down. If your fat gets stuck in it, too bad.

Fats
 

I've always taken the few that it's an unwritten right that the person in the middle seat gets both armrests. You stuck in the middle--you should at least get the crumb of the extra armrest.

touchy feely tigger
 

The center piece of the puzzle. At yet it's still gross. How could you do that at Disney of all places?

Fats
 

This was rich:

"If you cannot bring down the tray-table, have the flight attendant ask the passenger in front of you to put their seat to the full upright position for mealtime. If this doesn't help, set a pillow on your lap, and your meal tray on the pillow..."

I love the use of the term "meal time".

The vanilla language is killer.

touchy feely tigger
 

"Oh, I see what's goin on here... I see what's goin' on..."

Shot of penguin drinking martini in girlfriend's house.

Fats
 

I've never had the great big fattie either, but a friend of mine had a huge fat, smelly sweaty guy all the way to the left coast once. I'm looking for the email he sent regarding the incident. It was pretty funny, and I believe will out me as a plagiarist on most of my fat jokes...

Fats
 

We fatties like to refer to it as "see how many pounds I can pack onto my already overloaded frame" time.

What else would you call it besides meal time?

Fats
 

Shit, every damn ball game I went to this year, my seat was next to someone who weighed at least 4 bills.

I tell you what, though: I am gonna go to that next convention at the Newark Marriot, get a cart, load it with about 40 boxes of Krispy Kremes and stand outside come lunch time charging $3 a donut.http://www.krispykreme.com/images/caramelkremesmall.jpg

Fats and Public Transportation
 

I ride a train a lot and notice some very strange behavior pattersn:

1. The Bigot - This is the secretary with bad hair who agonized over whether to sit next to the Indian guy on the train yesterday, fucking up my ability to do so. I didn't like waiting behind you for the obvious open seat while you waited to grab the seat directly across from the guy next to the smiling blonde girl. Since I'm writing this, I guess your suspicioan that he may have been a Hindu terrorist was unfounded, but your vigilance ia appreciated. Keep an eye on those Sikhs. They carry knives, like your cousin who was stationed off India once told you...

2. The Guy on the Phone - I use the phone on the train, but only when I'm lucky enough to get the bulkhead space in the middle of the car which is walled off (the best seat in the train). Don't sit next to me and discuss dinner and work with your wife.

3. PC Guy - Get over yourself, Poindexter - Your brief isn't that important that you need to get out the PC on the 35 minute ride. Print out the cases you need to read before you leave the office and attempt to read them on the train, like the partners do.

4. Younger single attractive people - While you're agonizing over whether you can sit next to the hot, probably single guy/girl with the open seat, I'm stuck behind you watching the seats in front of you fill up from passengers getting on from the other side. Just sit down already - he/she isn't going to turn to you and say "Hey, loads of sexual tension, huh" or "Just so you know, you don't stand a chance" if you sit next to him/her. Who knows... maybe you'll get lucky.

Fats
 

You'll do better with pizza. Low carb. If it's a convention, the large want to give the illusion that they're at least "trying" to watch their weight. So selling low carb pizza (they can take their own crust off, but I doubt they will) will make you the cash.

Fats
 

Meal is something you feed domestic animals. Or something you hear that creepy guy in the Jimmy Dean sausages commercials say ("Sausage is best at any meal time"). It gives me pictures of farm folk grasping their paunches and exclaiming "Thet was some meal, Bessie."

I'd have used "Ask for a pillow when dinner/lunch/breakfast is served."

"The fingers you have used to dial this number are too fat."

Fats
 

Doubt it. Anyone who attends that convention has given up. I'd go with Krispy Kremes and bacon, though I would offer a non-pork breakfast meat option so as to accomodate Jewish and Muslim Fats.