Bullshit!
 

I know a few bong-smoking demons. Is that close enough?

simple solution
 

By the way, loved your press conference in the New Yorker this week.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

ABBA turned me. My anger is retroactive.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

No. If I had to pick a religion, Judaism would be it.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

Are you sure it's not the Methodists?

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

Weird, she turned me too. I'm not so crazy about the whole gay sex thing, but I really enjoy the spin classes.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

Only if they refuse to admit to being fucked up. ("No, there's nothing wrong. Why do you ask? Everything's fine. Couldn't be better! Oh, that? Only a flesh wound.")

Bullshit!
 

I agree, that one was pretty weak. I thought it was going to be something more interesting, like "people who want (or whose parents want them) to go to school to learn something useful in the job market should go to a trade school to learn HVAC installation and not waste time and money on a liberal arts BA," or "the only college grads who see a material income benefit are those who go to reasonably competitive schools" or "why is it that so many of "colleges" are really teaching remedial middle and high school skills?"

Incidentally, if you like Bullshit, get Freakonomics. Very entertaining read.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

The guy seriously didn't understand why I was making such a big deal about his "innocent" comment. Granted, this was not in the U.S. of fucking A., but I actually had to explain that this was offensive. He of course immediately was mortified and apologized -- he just knew the phrase (like "I got gypped!!!") and didn't know it's origin or meaning.

Eureka!
 

Are you getting laid, missy?

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

YESSSSSS!!!!!!!!

Eureka!
 

She's quoting from her favorite song -- you know, the "I've been to paradise, but I've never been to me" one? About the chick who had lots of fun being undressed by kings, drinking champagne on a yacht, etc., but tells the mom with the screaming kids in the frozen food aisle at the Grand Central that it was all meaningless, and that being a submissive wife/mother is the be-all, end-all to a woman's life.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

Spain and Latin America are some of the most racist places on earth. The UK and Ireland win no prizes for racial sensitivity either, now that you mention it (and I'm sure you did). And when you try to call someone on their stupid bullshit they laugh you off for being a typical P.C. American. But the Spainiards - ai yi yi dios mio.

simple solution
 

Thank you very much, Mr. Male-Human-Smells-Like-Fermented-Bananas-Maybe-Bite-Not-Sure! I look forward to sharing orange wedges with you someday.

Eureka!
 

1) because he's not my boyfriend.
2) It's the language of youth. I think it's cute, Ms. Blowjob Camel.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

Americans aren't nearly as racist as cab drivers.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

After all these years, I am really starting to like the cut of your jib.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

Tell me about it.

My Bolivian babysitter (US citizen, but born in Bolivia, has lived here 35+ years, and knows absolutely NO English) said to me (to ME!!) the other day, "Hmmph. The Jews run this city." I forget what context it came up in; I think it may have been during Passover, and so there weren't many people on the subway or something (she didn't consider that it was also spring break in the public schools). Anyway, I looked at her in utter disbelief and said, "What?!?" She quickly backed away from that statement.

Unbelievable.

The most ignorant comment I have ever been witness to, however, was the one from another babysitter (this one from Ecuador) when she commended me on my insistence on purchasing organic milk to avoid the hormones that are in non-organic milk. The reason? Because the hormones in non-organic milk can make your sons gay. Yes. You read that correctly.

edited to fix the quote tag by the always cheerful Not Boberino

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

That's because the cab drivers are all half-Irish/Columbian mongrels, full of small-minded xenophobic hate and savage bitterness.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

Or maybe she's just a retard?

Eureka!
 

I would think they could be deployed to great effect. Still have to watch out for hairy nipples, though.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

I have never heard thsi term "jewing down the price" Must be a patch a la Grammy Hall thing.

ANd I always thought it was "jipped" so no clue it was a slur as I have never seen it in writing. Is this to say that gypsies tend to get screwed? I am not familiar with the gypsy stereotypes, other than they are a nomadic people. Muchy like Lester.

Eureka!
 

Why? Because they'd interfere with effective suction?

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

simple solution
 

Me too! Even people who are great lays.

I used to have a great Calvin & Hobbes cartoon about how people suck. Loved it. That was the pre-antidepressant portion of my life.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

Nomadic thieves and hustlers.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

I like to go up to blind people standing at bus stops and give them rabbit ears. They never know!

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

the gypsy mom in Cher's song was a prostitute.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

I believe that the phrase roughly translates to "you should buy a black" [to carry your laundry for you]

I was born in the wagon of a travelling show
 

Indeed. Gypsies = tramps and thieves.

(But every night the men would come around, and lay their money down.)

Fuck! Beaten to the punch by Chinaski!

simple solution
 

I used to have this hilarious Garfield cartoon in which he eats, like, an entire lasagna in one gulp. I had it on my refrigerator. That was the pre-ABBA-made-me-gay portion of my life.

simple solution
 

Only straight men like Garfield? Interesting.

Eureka!
 

I have no idea. Ask Charlene.

Eureka!
 

Christ, I don't even remember the mom with the screaming kids in the frozen food section part. I thought she was just saying that jetsetting ain all that. I didnt realize this was a self righteous kayaking kinda tune.

I hope RP is not on her way to her.

I was born in the wagon of a travelling show
 

to the whore who took my post

some say we should keep personal remorse from the
posts,
stay light, and there is some reason in this,
but jezus;
twelve posts gone and I don't save them and you have
my
line drawings too, my best ones; its stifling:
are you trying to crush me out like the rest of them?
why didn't you take my login? they usually do
from the sleeping drunken keyboard sick in the corner.
next time take my left arm or a fifty
but not my posts:
I'm not Penske
but sometime simply
there won't be any more, abstract or otherwise;
here'll always be links to CNN and asshats and Sequels,
down to the last thread,
but as God said,
crossing his legs,
I see where I have made plenty of GAs
but not so very much
good posting.

Eureka!
 

1) I guess you aren't gonna tell theboard what happened? With Abba going the way of the monogs, you are one of the few interesting lived ones left. Bummer.

simple solution
 

I bet you loved Nermal.

Eureka!
 

You did not answer my question. You may be the new GWNC. Spill.

I was born in the wagon of a travelling show
 

Word on the street is that the Cherokee her father married in the song "Half Breed" was not really Cherokee.

I was born in the wagon of a travelling show
 

what do you think about the g-rated Ranger's jerseys?
http://www.eveningtimes.co.uk/hi/news/5039479.html