Spinster revisited
 

I think you should talk to a therapist about how you want to sleep inside a vagina, but at the same time fear it.

Spinster revisited
 

Or a slab of roast beef.

Spinster re-revisited
 

You left out the dog, the Tivo, and the 2 bottles of Shiraz.

Spinster revisited
 

Can't you just read Literotica or something?

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

This from the guy who found the utterly offensive 49er video "mildly entertaining."
Racist.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

Swigen. Swigen. San Francisco cocksuckah.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

What are you talking about? I think that was him in the 49er training video!

I couldn't find a picture of him in his Deadwood/San Francisco Cocksucker persona. Interestingly, he ("Phillip Moon") was also in Lebowski, credited as "Treehorn Thug."

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

Mmmmmm, Danica with a potty mouth. Time to lock the office door . . . .

Spinster revisited
 

I am sick and tired of therapy. No more for me for a while. Couples counseling sucked all the fun out of therapy.

Really tied the room together
 

"Well no, like I said... Woo peed on the rug."

Spinster revisited
 

I suppose it'll make the placement of the bed extra important. I wonder what Feng Shui has to say about the G-spot corner of the room.

Spinster re-revisited
 

Aw fuck.

Spinster re-revisited
 

I think he was talking about his sponsor.

Spinster re-revisited
 

Whoo hoo! No TIVO! Only DVDs!!!!

Though, really, referring to myself as a spinster does not seem to have had much of a downside.

Spinster re-revisited
 

I can't see why anyone said you are obsessed with me. ANd to be accurtae, you forgot my latst kitchen conquest.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

Mmmmmm, str8 masturbating to NFH posts. Time to unlock Zesty's vomitorium door . . . .

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

It's really quite fitting.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

Join me, won't you? And hold back my hair for a minute.

Tact (or lack thereof)
 

If you want the webcam invite, just say so. Sheesh.

Eureka!
 

Bingo, it was the kickboxing.

Spinster re-revisited
 

Speaking of sponsor, where's your Board donation?

Spinster revisited
 

I worked with someone who had her office with no windows painted a deep pinkish color. I used to call it her womb (but not to her face).

Spinster re-revisited
 

THe donation was made,, five yearts ago. And continues to keep on giving and gving and giving, bc without me, you're lost.

Spinster re-revisited
 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Spinster re-revisited
 

Contraction? So soon?

Spinster re-revisited
 

My uterus trains hard. Got Gatorade?

From the Things I Did Not Need To Know About BS file
 

Maybe its the preggo sex?

SPEARS: 'PREGNANT SEX IS BEST'
Expectant mom Britney Spears has been enjoying the best sex of her life since getting pregnant with husband Kevin Federline's child.
The singer -- who is due to give birth later this year -- believes the discomfort brought on by morning sickness and rapid mood swings is far outweighed by the marked improvement in her bedroom activities.

The 23-year-old says, "I think it's better than it was before. I think it's best. Sex is crazy good."


Ah yes, crazy good.

From the Things I Did Not Need To Know About BS file
 

Pregnant sex sucked. Which shouldn't come as a huge shock to anyone here.

From the Things I Did Not Need To Know About BS file
 

Word! And just wait'll her milk comes in!!!

From the Things I Did Not Need To Know About BS file
 

I am embarrassed for her, not just for feeling such a compulsion to talk about her sex life, and not for being so unbearably inarticulate about it, but for thinking that anyone finds the thought of her banging Federline anything but repulsive.

Britney, big deal, you had an orgasm, or think you did, or that you might soon. Either way, you didn't invent it. Shut up.

From the Things I Did Not Need To Know About BS file
 

What the fuck does she know about good sex? She's only 23.

From the Things I Did Not Need To Know About BS file
 

Isn't Kevin the only guy she's fucked? Or maybe like the 2nd? At least supposedly -- I recall she made a big fuss about being a virgin. What a moron!

ETA if this is a report based on some reporter or "reporter" overhearing a private conversation, then I sympathize with Britney. It's an exciting time for her, no matter how much I think she's an idiot, and if her sex life is better now than it was before she got pregnant, more power to her and Kevin.

If she said that in an interview -- I'm back to "what a moron!"

From the Things I Did Not Need To Know About BS file
 

Watchu talkin' bout Willis?!!?!?!

From the Things I Did Not Need To Know About BS file
 

Britney was totally, like, going to hold on to her virginity until marriage. Because that is, like, the most special gift that you can give to someone on your wedding night. But then Justin got, like, way pushy with the whole "enough blowjobs already" thing and Britney realized that, like, giving up your virginity to someone really really special, even if you aren't married, is a really really great way to show a person that you, like, totally love him. Then, according to some, Britney started, like, showing other people that she was pretty into them as well, which sort of pissed Justin off after his years and years of blowjobs and handjobs, so, like, Justin totally freaked out and, like, broke up with her and wrote some mean song about what a tramp she is. Thankfully, this turn of events set Britney free so that when she met her actual soulmate she could cart him off to London and bang his brains out (3 times in 1 day!) and discover the true meaning of crazy good sex.

The End.

From the Things I Did Not Need To Know About BS file
 

Holy shit, that is impressive.

From the Things I Did Not Need To Know About BS file
 

Okay, but it only took them a half hour. I don't want to embarrass anyone, but I think Kevin might have some staying power issues. Shit - was that disability unfriendly?

From the Things I Did Not Need To Know About BS file
 

I think Jessica Simpson must have told her that she heard orgasms were like, crazy fun.

Britney reminmds me of that character from Valley of the Dolls- thee male singer with the disease that winds him up in the institution with Neely O'Hara. Some kind of man-child syndrome.

From the Things I Did Not Need To Know About BS file
 

Assuming that he pops right back up after deflating, is three 10-min fucks really that much different than a single half-hour fuck? I don't think so. Of course, this may be one example of how I have low, low standards.

If it was 3 10-min fucks spread over 24 hours, though, THAT's a problem.

From the Things I Did Not Need To Know About BS file
 

Unless it was 3 different guys in those 24 hours.

http://www.ianstorm.com/screens/Stor.../hat_trick.jpg

Stripes
 

I see that the extended cut of Stripes is coming out soon, with -- among other features -- 20 minutes of additional scenes. I think that the first person who sees it owes all of us -- not to mention the rest of humanity -- a full description. We want more Francis.