| Replaced_Texan |
12-11-2009 04:29 PM |
Aa
Quote:
Originally Posted by ABBAKiss
(Post 410453)
Okay, I will try to streamline this. Even with the chaotic details you will be provided here I am leaving out a LOT of the drama and ick. Everyone below is in AA and attends the same meetings so is in frequent contact.
McDouche dated NiceGirl about 6 years ago for perhaps 10 months. He cheated on her and treated her like crap. She ended up in counseling over him for years. She eventually moved on, and moved to Louisiana.
ABBAKiss starts going to AA in 2006, while drinking every day for about 4 months. In March 2007, McDouche has a heart to heart with ABBKiss and convinces her to stop drinking. A torrid love affair begins.
Disgusting drama....BABYKiss...blahblahblah
NiceGirl moves back to MN and starts dating NiceHotGuy in 2008. NiceGirl and ABBAKiss become unlikely friends. They are much alike. They hang out, just the two of them and in groups that include NiceHotGuy.
ABBKiss and McDouche have chaos. NiceGirl dumps NiceHotGuy, or he dumps her, or anyway, they break up right before Thanksgiving. NiceHotGuy and ABBAKiss start talking....and hanging out...and McDouche causes a big scene when he finds NiceHotGuy at ABBAKiss's house.
So, anyway, now McDouche is all pissed (good, whatever) for various reasons. But ABBAKiss does not want to upset NiceGirl. She has now essentially taken two of NiceGirl's exes.
ABBAKiss needs to talk to NiceGirl about this. NiceGirl has no idea ABBAKiss and NiceHotGuy are dating.
Ideas on how to approach? And yes, all four of us are in the same meetings together, although this will likely have to change.
BTW, sorry about the third person. How annoying. Ick.
Oh -- and I have been drinking again. Only NiceHotGuy knows this. McDouche would FREAK if he knew.
So, CHAOS!!!!! :D
|
First and foremost, you need to find another meeting, and maybe even look into outpatient rehab depending on how bad you think your alcohol problem really is. Obviously, the one you're currently attending isn't working, and McDouche's presence there--not to mention everyone else's--means that you're going to be distracted. Work on your AA stuff in a separate context from all of the other stuff. And you have a really good reason to explain to everyone else: you've cut him out of your life to the extent possible, and you need to be in a different meeting than he is in.
I realize, of course, that this is easier said than done. But then so is all of the really hard stuff in life. You're really awesome at giving great dieting and exercise advice, in order to look great and maintain a healthy lifestyle. Think of separating yourself from this group of people to really work on your alcohol issues as another factor in maintaining a healthy lifestyle.
As for the dramatic incest, are you all actually dating or just sort of hanging out? I'd tread very carefully here. If it looks like just a fling, then maybe she doesn't need to know more than the fact that you guys are hanging out. If it looks like its going to be something bigger, let her know about it. Especially if she's eventually going to find out from someone else, like the newly irritated McDouche.
My particular group of friends can be very incestuous, and it generally doesn't cause any problems but sometimes it's a huge, huge issue where sides are taken, feelings are hurt, and the dynamic changes. No one has any "right" to any other person, but that doesn't mean that dating someone's ex is going to be consequence-free.
I wish you the most happiness through all of this. I think that having a good friend who you can share experiences with and can trust to understand you is really important. I also think that a good healthy relationship can be awesome. And I hope that you can have both. |
