Quote:
Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Some guys undo their belt and pants to piss. This is unnecessary and dandy-ish, in my opinion. You're not going to fuck your shirt up so much pulling your pecker through your zipper that you need to retuck your shirt every time you piss. And for god's sake, dispense with standing in front of the mirror and talking to me while retucking your shirt while I wash my hands. I don't need to know whose boxers you wear (if you do this while wearing tidy-whiteys, I will have no choice but to assume you're hitting on me, and run for fear of falling victim to some restroom frottage).
I also get very annoyed by full-unbuckle piss because it makes me, and people like me who engage in the mere unzip-and-pull-it-out urination, feel like we're not hygenic. I get the sense that these nancy boys who must do the full unbuckle do it for some sort of deep seeded subconscious exhibitionist kick, coupled with a belief that its somehow manly to stand around pulling your pants up and adjusting your shirt after pissing. I say fuck them, and everything they stand for. It's almost as annoying as those assholes who bring a newspaper to the bathroom to shit. Here's a tip - if it take the entire sports page to "drop the kids off at the pool", you ought to see a fucking doctor. Its not a goddamn holiday; take your dump, wipe your ass and get the fuck out. The process should take about two minutes. If it doesn't, buy some Metamucil.
Luckily for me, none of this applies, since its been about 14 years since I switched to commando.
* Classic opening line from Get Yer Ya Yas out.
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I have never in my life thought that it as easier to be a woman when it came to bathroom behavior. You know, we have the long lines, the squatting and hovering, the toilet paper that you didn't notice was gone until too late.
But you know what? I've changed my mind. I have never been gladder that I have a vagina.
