1. Why must we protect this house?
2. Why do we have sideline reporters?
QUOTE OF THE WEEK
Really, this is an off-off Broadway play. It's called "Self-Immolation in One Act."
There was an Allen Pinkett Shooting Himself in the Verbal Foot deal from last Monday night's Green Bay-Tennessee game. Pinkett, a sideline reporter (I doubt for very much longer) for Westwood One, was on the field and wanted to inject a comment about an instant-replay decision in the first quarter of the game. So Marv Albert and Boomer Esiason, upstairs, threw to him for this memorable car wreck of a sideline report.
Albert: Let's check in with Allen Pinkett. Allen?
Pinkett: Boom, going back to that instant replay, I think sometimes when they view it and break it down, it's similar to the way they broke down the Rodney King beating. You know, when you look at it in parts it doesn't look like they beat him up so bad. But when you see it real fast, he got his butt beat. So, uh, the totality, I guess, of the event, is what, uh, is what they look at.
Albert: Boomer, you want to analyze that?
Esiason: Nope. (Faintly, like he's moving away from the mike. And then laughing.) Nope. I can't say anything to that one.
Albert: Wait a moment here! A minute two to go in this first quarter. And it looks like Tennessee has called a timeout ... I think that we're going to get some emails from Howard [Deneroff, the Westwood One producer] and the rest of the staff on that one.
Esiason: (Laughing)
Albert: You OK, Boomer? A reminder that for every touchdown scored ...
Esiason: (Loud snort)
Albert: ... inside the red zone tonight and all season long on Monday night football Milwaukee Electric Tool will make a donation to Habitat for Humanity. Heavy duty helping for families in need. Second and 10 from the 20 when we resume with Tennessee in front of Green Bay by the score of 17 to 3. Boomer, you gonna be okay? You all right?
Esiason: (Feeble from laughing.) Yeah, I'll be all right.
Albert: Was that a Saturday Night Live satirical sideline moment?
Esiason: (Dreamily) Ohhhhhh.
Postscript: Pinkett was a fill-in for John Dockery last week. I hear Dockery will be back tonight for Rams-Bucs.
http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/200...x.html?cnn=yes