Quote:
Originally posted by Sidd Finch
Okay, since we are being all mature and serious here....
It really depends -- did she just fuck/have a fling, or is she getting serious about someone else? My response would depend on that. If the former, I'd want to know why more than anything. If the latter, I'd clear my bank accounts and be prepared for war. You shouldn't assume the situation is salvageable any more than you should assume that cuckold, if he's real, wants to get out.
Sebby's advice, as usual, is amusing but not something any real person should pay attention to. If the plan is to 'even the score', you're best off just dumping her and moving on.
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Wow. Everyone's responses have been great. I actually appreciate SD's advice, although I'm not ready to follow it yet. The idea about emptying the bank accounts is a wise one, at least in part. Long ago I had a joint account with a girlfriend. Day before she broke up with me she took out $5k, leaving me with about $200 to live on for the summer before the bar.
Okay, details, as several asked for: we have young kids and it would pretty much kill me not to see them every day, but on the other hand I'm a GA and taking full time care of them alone would be very, very difficult. Before I found out about the affair, we were having some problems but I was definitely trying to work them out. Now, I'm not so sure. Based on knowing the guy and what I read, I think the level of emotional involvement is somewhere in the middle for her: it's definitely not a one night stand, but I don't think either of them are looking for a permenant hookup (although I could see them occassionally sleeping together for years, if the occassion arose). Several of the e-mails from "Bill" were suggesting three ways with various other women, to which my wife seemed at least somewhat receptive.
I'm still working through this, but right now I'm leaning toward not being okay with this. If it were a one night thing, a fling on a business trip, a hooking up with an old boyfriend just for a weekend, I'd get over it. But I don't think that's the case, even if it isn't a long-term thing either.
I suppose my biggest issue is whether I confront her or not. I could just leave and not say why.
