Quote:
Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
So, now that my Halle has been exposed for her hideous deformity, I must move on. I am currently taking submissions for a new number one spot on my list. Photographic evidence is a must, so please include a photograph of who you think should be the next Mrs. ImaginaryMarshall. Joke responses are welcome (as if that even matters) as well.
TM
ETA: This reminds me of a story of my overwhelming shallowness*. When I was in college, the school across the river had much hotter girls than our school. Since my school was pretty small, it didn't take long to run out of fresh meat. So, midway through the second trimester, we were all scouting the talent across the river.
Anyway, I met this girl and she was hot. Not smokin' hot, but very good looking, with a nice body. We immediately clicked, did the sex, hung out, spent time -- she was on her way to becoming my gf for a few weeks.
One day, I'm in her room and we're just lying in bed listening to Bob Marley's Legend (of course) and I'm holding her hand. I'm kind of caressing it and something ain't right. I look down and her thumb is kind of stumpy. Not cut-off short. Just kind of off. Anyway, it freaked me out and grossed me out and that was the end of that.
So, a month later (after she started talkign to me again), I set her up with my roomate. He was all happy and on his way to making her his gf. It was when he was telling me how happy he was with her that I told him to take a good look at her thumb.
He broke up with her the next day.
Good times. Good times.
*This is not an invitation to submit nfh as the next Mrs. ImaginaryMarshall
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I messed around with a girl in law school for a while, often pretty drunk. Pretty nice package all around.
Then one day one of my only LS friends tells me "Hey, ____ (the girl's ex bf) said she has a really ugly cooter. Is it all fucked up looking?"
I'd never looked, having almost exclusively groped her while drunk and not chowed down there.
Well, I had to go down on her to find out, and it was strange because I could figure out whether it was really fucked up or not (the lighting wasn't great). So I kept looking at it whenever I got the chance, but never really was able to formulate a position on whether he cooter was indeed horrific.
Ultimately, this complex drove me crazy, because my friend kept busting my balls in front of people about how my fuckbuddy had a deformed vag.
My solution? None. I wound up getting caught by her having sex with some coke whore I met a bar. That was that. But now... still to this day, I compare every vag I see to hers. And I still can't figure out if hers was really deformed. But I have concluded based on all this research that my high school gf had a very odd looking cooter.
