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My Acceptance Speech for Winning the Parody Contest
[Visibly surprised when reaching the podium]
[Flinty's eyes glazed while clutching the award statuette, shaped like a mini- alanis morrisette humping a burberry handbag]
Wow....thank you, thank you. I wasn't expecting this. It has been a great honor to be part of such a wonderful contest, and with such great and talented competitors. I have always been a big fan of Atticus' posts, at least the posts that I actually understood, so this is truly a special moment. [Flinty waves at Atticus in the audience] Let's give AG a round of applause...Stand up and take a bow Atticus, go on, stand up. [Camera pans to Atticus mouthing "Blow me" in Aramaic] And Thurgreed, where is Thurgreed? [camera pans to TM wearing full Yankee regalia, hat and headphones] Thurgreed, in a world of rain, you are a ray of sunshine and hope. Your perpetual optimism is an inspiration to us all. [Camera pans to Thurgreed, who is too busy staring at Thrasher's seat]
Gosh, there's so many people I have to thank. First of all, Leagl, thanks for putting on the contest, PLF for retirning, Penske and his many many supporters, and my agent, e/o (the check's the mail). Finally, I'd like to give a shout out to God, because without him/her/it/them, I wouldn't have been here.
[Get off the stage music plays, Flinty escorted away]
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I'm going to become rich and famous after I invent a device that allows you to stab people in the face over the internet.
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