Quote:
Originally Posted by Adder
The former.
Had only made out at the time of the kissing comment, and yeah, it was noted as a definite red flag. Which is why I brought up woman B, which she handled well enough to lower the alarm.
After that followed the sex and the previously-scheduled (as in last week) date with woman B.
Rather than the concept, we specifically discussed the date with woman B. But before the email, my thinking was that this is the conversation that woman A and I need to have.
Right, and I am too. I just never expected things with woman A to move so quickly, and, of course, I didn't entirely realize that she didn't mean the things she actually said (or she realized later she felt differently).
That seems to be the disconnect.
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It's really not surprising that she would have a different view of your relationship after the sex than she had before the sex. While it may not be justified, it's typical and you should have realized that. And now I really don't blame her for not wanting to go out with you again. You just had sex with her, and instead of being excited about where your "relationship" with her might go from there, you are focusing your energy on meeting other women and probably trying to have sex with them. While this doesn't automatically make you an asshole, or even unusual, it would make you somebody I wouldn't want to see again if I were her.
I think you should just apologize to her for the misunderstanding and then don't contact her again. And next time move more slowly unless you're sure the online date you are about to have sex with is ok with you having sex with her while dating and having sex with other people. There are plenty of girls online who wouldn't give a shit about that (and I was one of those girls for part of the time I was online dating) but you can't tell if you're dating one of those girls unless you ask.
