Quote:
Originally Posted by Pretty Little Flower
My uncle and his two brothers are the Northeastern/Mid-Atlantic, been-to-university types you describe. All three went to a Catholic university on the Main Line. My other uncle also went to law school there, whereas my father went to business school at a prominent Massachusetts university mostly associated around here with Hank. Both of my uncles are/were hardened bigots and, as I mentioned, my uncle who disowned his daughter was not ostracized or shamed in his professional or personal circles, either when he was in the Greenwich corridor or now (he is in a different Mid-Atlantic state). My father, while far from being proponent of progressive politics, thankfully never exhibited any overt racism that I was aware of, but nor did he challenge his brothers on their racism. I understand that these facts do not fit into your narrative of the world, so you will dismiss them as being outliers. I disagree.
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In the spirit of finding points of agreement rather than disagreement, there is undoubtedly a failure on the part of many Northeastern/Mid-Atlantic, been-to-university types to challenge racism.
The preferred approach is not a cut direct or an attack, but staring down at one's drink and politely finding a way to leave out of embarrassment. Or a nervous laugh or changing of the subject, the former being incredibly cowardly, but truth be told, not much more so than the staring at your drink strategy.
I don't have a narrative any more or less than you have a narrative. And perhaps that's the point. YMMV. In my experience, overt racism would cause one to be socially ostracized. I grew up as a little kid hanging out with a gay couple for whose design studio my mother worked (it had a really cool bar in it too). Homophobia was immediately verboten. My grandfather was a bit of anti-Semitic Russian/Pole, but I was always warned not to acquire his views in that regard. And living in a Jewish, Indian, Asian, and Italian neighborhood it was impossible to acquire any other prejudices.
But if you saw me, if you met me, and you were a bigot, you might as some bigots do assume that I'd happily hold forth on xenophobic commentary and jokes. And if you were a hardened progressive, you'd label me a fratty jackass, assume I was a bigot, and avoid me. Many people have made that mistake with me and I think a lot of others like me. But it's wrong -- it's cultural identity politics, a terrible heuristic if it can even be called that. Those generalizations do not and cannot stand for all people of a certain background anymore than your bigoted uncles are an archetype of all country club Republicans.
But in terms of generalizing, I have to take my own medicine. I am not sure that all Trump populists are bigots. I said that, and that's easy to say, but it's also a simplification that allows me to dismiss them. I was wrong to do so.
