Quote:
Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
Maybe, if we're good, could you tell a story about the 2 girls on the cover?
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The incredibly true story of two girls in love, on the cover of a sleazy pulp novel?
Sure honey, pull up your chair.
Oh and gratz to the folks in NJ who can be domestic partners in about 180 days. You go New Jersey!
Of course there is a down side to all this domestication going on. Now people are going to start pressuring me to settle down in domestic partnership bliss. My days of being the envy of all my straight, married, settled down friends will have to end and I'll have to find a good Jewish doctor to domestic partner with, and register at some froo froo place and wear a dress (maybe mauve would be a good colour for me,) never mind heels (ok I like the heels) and makeup. And I'll have to carry flowers and then throw them at another woman and...oh wait, will the butch women be allowed to try to catch the flowers too? Or just the femmes? And what about the more in between sorts like me?
Then people will be like, so when are you and Bunny going to have kids Leagl? Tick-tock Tick-tock, you're over 30 Leagl that biological clock must be going off like mad.
And they'll be asking whether we plan on finding a man to use or going to a bank, and will we have more than one child, and then there will be diapers and crying, and I know I shouldn't cry but I can't help it - all this responsibility of being a "normal member of society" the pressure, oh God the pressure.
And what will I call this woman while we are in the process of getting domestic partnered? I mean do I call her my fiance? My soon to be DP? Hi Hank, meet my soon to be DP, Bunny. We are registered at Pottery Barn. We really need plates. We are also registered at Good Vibrations. We really need a strap-on. Stay away from the Lennox though please.
And will I be a Mrs. then? Or can I stay a Ms? And do I need to get an engagement ring, or can I just wear a wedding band?
Help me Debt Slave, please help me. Maybe we should write a book to answer all these questions so everyone knows now, before it gets out of control?
And I finally just got my apartment the way I like it, and we all know Bunny is going to make me change it. Or buy a house or something, and she won't like my furniture and will insist on new stuff. And we also all know I won't be able to keep my sporty car any more, oh no. And I'll have to drive safe cause Bunny will get mad at me if I keep speeding, but only because she loves me and I have a family to support. And she'll probably make me quit this non profit gig and go join a big law firm, and then I'll be miserable like Sebbie, but I'll have no choice cause my hot wife with the great tits and the awesome ass will insist.
Oh the humanity.
