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Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
This isn't the PB. I wasn't expecting to defend my thesis from an embattled position, but I'm not afraid to, either. It was just a thought I had. I won't think any less of me for having been wrong.
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Maybe the problem with what I wrote originally was that I said it to forcefully. But if you go back and read it, I believe it started with something like "In my experience [what you said] is untrue." That was the return thought to the thought you had.
Quote:
Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
I would surmise that those men are thinking of their spouses (as you and I are not, because we're lawyers and compartmentalize things to make specific points), but it's interesting that married women don't ID their spouses as their best friends at the same rate --- they point to a third party, usually a woman.
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Your problem is that you're depending on a study about friendship which is too subjective a topic to write scientific studies about. A friendship is a friendship. Your relationship with your wife should go beyond friendship. You are close in a way that you could never be with a friend. You are close with your friends in ways you would never be with your wife. Maybe that's the lawyer in me compartmentalizing, but I think they are different things.
Quote:
Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
I take it you recognize this is exactly the point I made about male-male friendships in one of my posts. So at least one of my generalizations is supported by TM anecdotal evidence.
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Unfair. The post containing your anecdotal evidence came after I categorically rejected your original thesis. And, if you apply your own logic, the TM anecdotal evidence supporting your thesis doesn't make your thesis right because it is anecdotal. And further, you supported your own generalization with anecdotal evidence of your own. (But now, we're just jerking each other off, aren't we?)
Quote:
Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
You chose the one indicator of best-friendship that automatically favors men.
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Well, (NFH's multiple "bestest" category notwithstanding), you can only have one best friend and should only have one best man. I would think that the two should always be one and the same. However, I do recognize that political considerations sometimes come into play. However [warning: more anecdotal evidence coming], when I was discussing this topic with my best friend before my wedding, I said, "It wouldn't be right to have anyone else standing up for me as my best man." He said, "I wouldn't even consider it. If you couldn't be at my wedding as the best man, the position would not be filled by some next best man. There wouldn't be one. There is only one best man and you're him all the time."
TM
