Quote:
Originally posted by robustpuppy
Hasn't this debate happened already?
People change. That's like saying divorce should be welcome and automatic if somebody becomes less sexually attractive to his or her partner, whether by weight gain, or something less within their control like illness.
How many people do you think really bait and switch, rather than recognize that their desires have changed? This can happen to either partner. Certainly if their desires on something so fundamental diverge, then they should part, but it shouldn't be automatic.
Honestly, I find it funny how people can be so absolute about such a complex issue.
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I know someone. He has maintained at least for as long as I've known him that he does not desire any children. I have known him a long time.
His wife knew that he had no deisre for children when she married him 10 years ago. About 2 years ago, she approached him and said that she wanted to have a baby and if he wouldn't comply, she'd leave him. He asked her to give him 3 months to think about it.
She got pregnant during those 3 months. And had a baby.
Their marriage is over.
It is fair to change your mind. It is not fair to impose your will on people you love, or to saddle a child with the future fucked-up-ness of having a father who neither wanted nor wants you.
This is one of the saddest stories I have heard.
