Quote:
Originally posted by robustpuppy
Ultimately, though, I fear my relationship with my child won't be as satisfying as I've imagined/fantasized.
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Well, duh. I assure you it won't be. Note, however, that only a control freak would think this has anything to do with whether it is worthwhile.*
I once heard a speaker whose child was born with Down syndrome. She said the experience was like buying plane tickets to Paris, when you've wanted to see Paris your entire life. Then you find out our your plane landed in Helsinki due to a mix-up by the airline. At first, you're pissed off, because dammit, you paid for tickets to Paris! You have a
right to be in Paris! You do everything in your power to get back on a plane, but the flights are all booked, and the airline is totally unfair. So you're stuck in Helsinki. After a while, you realize that Helsinki is a beautiful city, with a rich history and plenty of fine people, good food, and moments to cherish. You find that you'd even recommend Helsinki to friends who wouldn't have dreamed of going there. Sure, Paris would have been great, too, but you're soon showing everybody photos of your vacation to Helsinki.
I'm here to tell you, everybody wants to go to Paris --- who wouldn't? But we all wind up in Helsinki or Edinburgh or Rome or Vilnius or Minsk, and surprisingly few of us are bitching about it. If you're not prepared to surrender that kind of control, parenting is not for you. If you'd sulk in your hotel room, parenting is not for you. If you'd immediately ask the concierge whether Vilnius has any good titty bars, you'll be just fine.
* Note that this post is not directed at anyone who has decided not to have kids. I respect that, and feel no need to persuade you.
