Quote:
Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
My favorite is "You really like the hard stuff" or "I used to be able to drink like you until I had kids" or "You have a hollow leg..." I always just smile and walk away. Those folks are usually looking for ammo.
There's always an old partner somewhere who'll drink and smoke with you. Find him.
NEVER discuss religion while drunk. Lord, has that one cost me in the past... I made some crack years ago about how you'd have to be shit for brains to be pro-life, only to have a guy tell me his wife had endometriosis and couldn't have children, and that people like me took the easy way out and deprived he and his wife of available adoptable children. He then hit me with a screed about the decline of western civilization, and I had to eat every syllable.
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There is no safe way to drink normally at a firm function. The only intelligent approach (at least until you get the keys to the firm- ) is to sip a few scotches, make your way around the room showing face, then you and friends can leave for a bar somewhere. There is too much back room evaluation based upon unfair impressions anal old people may form.
We had one party where they hire a Kareoke. This one young litigation guy, had a few and he's doing "I Write the Songs" totally lounge lizard, but spot on perfect- substitutting lines to make it personal "When I look in your eyes, Hank Chinaski,"
he was a hit by any definition.
I was standing by his group leader and over hear him say "Hear that? That's the sound of a career going down the tubes."
Fuck. They provide free drinks- and hire Kareoke- but if you use both well- you are out?