Toronto Trim's Hotel Cum Drop-in Centre

[Sparklehorse]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
If you try to board before they call your row number, they should put you in a pen on the side and force you to board last. If you wait right next to the door, blocking everyone else's access whose turn it is to board because you want to be the first person in row 15 to shove your oversized bag into overhead storage lengthwise, your belongings should be thrown onto the runway.

Here is what I do not understand. Everyone must must must (bite bite bite) board the plane as soon as physically possible, so they can sit down. Then, when the plane lands, everyone must immediately pop up and stand in the aisle or half-crunched near the window for 15 minutes waiting for other people to file out. Why? What does that get you? An extra 3 minutes on the cab line? A little extra rev-up time to achieve full annoyance level while waiting for your checked-in bags because they couldn't possibly get from the plane to the carousel faster than the oldest old person on the plane could crawl there?

While I'm at it, put your shit into the overhead as fast as you can, and do it from within your row. If you are holding up the whole line of people trying to board because you needed to be in your seat in row 7 before anyone else set foot on the plane, you should be trampled to death or a really bad headache.

TM

This week's bite bite bite article in the New Yorker is almost on topic:

David Sedaris on flying seated next to an asshole