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Old 06-21-2005, 02:05 PM   #11
greatwhitenorthchick
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Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Giving a three hour blowjob
Posts: 8,220
Asinine lists

Quote:
Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
So Energy Spatula over at Will Work for Favorable Dicta reports on a ridiculous article over at MSN on "Ten Things Every Single Girl Must Own

1. A fabulous photo of yourself
2. A pretty pair of heels
3. An Eminem CD
4. A great pickup line…and a way to blow 'em off
5. A six-pack of good bottled beer
6. Bathroom reading
7. A business card
8. Earplugs
9. A straight male friend on your speed-dial
10. A condom

According to Energy Spatula, these are all mantrapping items. "They suggest that you use the awesome picture of yourself to send to people you meet online so they'll think you're hot, and hang it on the fridge at eye-level so any guy you bring home will look at it and think you're hot too." Their beer suggestion is Sam Adams. The ear plugs are just in case he snores. The reading material isn't for the ladies.

I had no idea Eminem was the Trinity Sessions of the male population.

Fuck, I snore. And where the fuck are the vibrators on this list? One condom? Jesus, let's not get too optimistic.
I keep sex toy catalogs in the bathroom for reading material. It's funny how much time some of my friends spend in there sometimes.

Oh, and before I forget, I saw Helen Gurley Brown yesterday in some hideous all-sequin outfit. She has the spindliest legs ever. And a humungous head. Odd-looking woman.
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