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Old 10-26-2009, 07:39 PM   #1336
Atticus Grinch
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Re: Mrs. DTB

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Originally Posted by tmdiva View Post
I would say "Congratulations!", but aren't you supposed to say "Best wishes" to the bride, and "Congratulations" to the groom? Where's DS/BRC when we need her?

tm
This is true, by which I mean it's true that you're not supposed to, because it's supposedly bad taste to imply that the bride has garnered something by getting her man. Supposedly it comes off like "good job." The fact that the rule did not apply equally to grooms is strong evidence it is obsolete. What you are now congratulating is not the getting of a man, an event that probably preceded the wedding by some months or years anyway, but in the success of the ceremony rather than the success of the relationship.

I think the root of congratulations is something like "(I) rejoice with (you)," so all in all even honoring the existence of that superstition is more sour than the sentiment behind it.

ETA comparing it to "best wishes" shows it to be an even more odious double standard -- it basically implies that women are not the agents of their own destinies, but men are. The marriage came about because of the initiative of the man, who is to be congratulated, but the woman is merely offered a vague well-wishing that it turns out okay? Now that I've thought about it, I am never honoring this tradition again. And I do some crazy shit for auld lang syne.

Last edited by Atticus Grinch; 10-26-2009 at 07:47 PM..
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Old 10-26-2009, 07:47 PM   #1337
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Re: Mrs. DTB

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Originally Posted by Atticus Grinch View Post
(feminist analysis of the manners of congratulating newlyweds)
Be still my beating heart. You'll always be my favorite.

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Old 10-26-2009, 08:06 PM   #1338
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Re: Mrs. DTB

Quote:
Originally Posted by Atticus Grinch View Post
This is true, by which I mean it's true that you're not supposed to, because it's supposedly bad taste to imply that the bride has garnered something by getting her man. Supposedly it comes off like "good job." The fact that the rule did not apply equally to grooms is strong evidence it is obsolete. What you are now congratulating is not the getting of a man, an event that probably preceded the wedding by some months or years anyway, but in the success of the ceremony rather than the success of the relationship.

I think the root of congratulations is something like "(I) rejoice with (you)," so all in all even honoring the existence of that superstition is more sour than the sentiment behind it.

ETA comparing it to "best wishes" shows it to be an even more odious double standard -- it basically implies that women are not the agents of their own destinies, but men are. The marriage came about because of the initiative of the man, who is to be congratulated, but the woman is merely offered a vague well-wishing that it turns out okay? Now that I've thought about it, I am never honoring this tradition again. And I do some crazy shit for auld lang syne.
Setting aside the rules and the politics behind them, though, don't you wish dtb the best, because this guy can't be good enough for her?

And isn't this guy due his congratulations, because, hey, he married dtb?
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Old 10-26-2009, 09:01 PM   #1339
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Re: Mrs. DTB

Quote:
Originally Posted by Atticus Grinch View Post
This is true, by which I mean it's true that you're not supposed to, because it's supposedly bad taste to imply that the bride has garnered something by getting her man. Supposedly it comes off like "good job." The fact that the rule did not apply equally to grooms is strong evidence it is obsolete. What you are now congratulating is not the getting of a man, an event that probably preceded the wedding by some months or years anyway, but in the success of the ceremony rather than the success of the relationship.

I think the root of congratulations is something like "(I) rejoice with (you)," so all in all even honoring the existence of that superstition is more sour than the sentiment behind it.

ETA comparing it to "best wishes" shows it to be an even more odious double standard -- it basically implies that women are not the agents of their own destinies, but men are. The marriage came about because of the initiative of the man, who is to be congratulated, but the woman is merely offered a vague well-wishing that it turns out okay? Now that I've thought about it, I am never honoring this tradition again. And I do some crazy shit for auld lang syne.
the biggest lie told on these pages is when you said you weren't constipated. no offense.
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Old 10-26-2009, 09:03 PM   #1340
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Re: Mrs. DTB

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Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy View Post
Setting aside the rules and the politics behind them, though, don't you wish dtb the best, because this guy can't be good enough for her?

And isn't this guy due his congratulations, because, hey, he married dtb?
You are giving Atticus a run for his money, mister.
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Old 10-26-2009, 09:32 PM   #1341
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Re: Mrs. DTB

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the biggest lie told on these pages is when you said you weren't constipated. no offense.
My iPhone has a camera and I'm not afraid to use it.
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Old 10-26-2009, 09:54 PM   #1342
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Re: Mrs. DTB

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You are giving Atticus a run for his money, mister.
careful. some of the a-listers are talking (or so I've heard) that we don't need Atticus, notbob and this new ggg.

ever read sophie's choice?


ps http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/24/ed...baby.html?_r=1
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Last edited by Hank Chinaski; 10-26-2009 at 10:25 PM..
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Old 10-26-2009, 10:14 PM   #1343
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Re: Mrs. DTB

Quote:
Originally Posted by Atticus Grinch View Post
This is true, by which I mean it's true that you're not supposed to, because it's supposedly bad taste to imply that the bride has garnered something by getting her man. Supposedly it comes off like "good job." The fact that the rule did not apply equally to grooms is strong evidence it is obsolete. What you are now congratulating is not the getting of a man, an event that probably preceded the wedding by some months or years anyway, but in the success of the ceremony rather than the success of the relationship.

I think the root of congratulations is something like "(I) rejoice with (you)," so all in all even honoring the existence of that superstition is more sour than the sentiment behind it.

ETA comparing it to "best wishes" shows it to be an even more odious double standard -- it basically implies that women are not the agents of their own destinies, but men are. The marriage came about because of the initiative of the man, who is to be congratulated, but the woman is merely offered a vague well-wishing that it turns out okay? Now that I've thought about it, I am never honoring this tradition again. And I do some crazy shit for auld lang syne.
Namaste.
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Old 10-26-2009, 11:41 PM   #1344
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Re: Mrs. DTB

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I know everyone was on tenterhooks awaiting this announcement, so let me end the suspense and let you all know that my nuptials were completed yesterday.

You can now call me (as some wag recently did) Mrs. Al Unser, Jr.
Congratulations!!
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Old 10-27-2009, 01:24 AM   #1345
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Re: Mrs. DTB

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Congratulations!!
ditto.
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Old 10-27-2009, 07:46 AM   #1346
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Re: Mrs. DTB

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Originally Posted by dtb View Post
I know everyone was on tenterhooks awaiting this announcement, so let me end the suspense and let you all know that my nuptials were completed yesterday.

You can now call me (as some wag recently did) Mrs. Al Unser, Jr.
Hey, Congratulations! I'm toasting you. It's only coffee, but the sentiment's there.

3 week honeymoon?
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Old 10-27-2009, 08:55 AM   #1347
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Re: Mrs. DTB

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Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield View Post
Hey, Congratulations! I'm toasting you. It's only coffee, but the sentiment's there.

3 week honeymoon?
I wish -- but, alas, we already have a bunch of kids, who are in school, so the honeymoon was in August. Besides -- what's a honeymoon without a lot of boozing?

Thank you for your kind toast (with your coffee). And thanks to everyone for your congratulations. I'm still in the perma-grin phase.
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Old 10-27-2009, 10:31 AM   #1348
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Re: Actual Fashion Question

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If you're nuts, Borellis, Brionis or Kitons are really fucking sweet. But that's out of my tax bracket.
These brands make no sense to me. Can't you have shirts hand-tailored for you for less than you'll pay for one of these?
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Old 10-27-2009, 10:32 AM   #1349
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Re: Mrs. DTB

Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb View Post
I know everyone was on tenterhooks awaiting this announcement, so let me end the suspense and let you all know that my nuptials were completed yesterday.

You can now call me (as some wag recently did) Mrs. Al Unser, Jr.
Congrats!

What's a tenterhook?
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Old 10-27-2009, 10:42 AM   #1350
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Re: Mrs. DTB

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Originally Posted by Greedy,Greedy,Greedy View Post
Setting aside the rules and the politics behind them, though, don't you wish dtb the best, because this guy can't be good enough for her?

And isn't this guy due his congratulations, because, hey, he married dtb?
Enough already.

TM
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