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dtb 12-07-2009 02:13 PM
Re: Does he have enough $$ to pay them all?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield (Post 409546)
I said that because it seems natural that a person cheated on would, for purposes of bolstering their self esteem, etc... be quick to suggest the person their SO slept with was not as attractive as they are. I have also heard people who have been cheated on describe the person with whom their spouse or SO had an affair as unattractive only to later see this person and realize he/she was more attractive than the person cheated on. So I don't think it's a bizarre conclusion at all.

I agree with your second paragraph, but that wasn't the issue to which I was speaking.

On the third, YMMV. I have had the experience you relate, but I've also seen the opposite.

On the recap, recap back at you: See paragraphs 1 and 3.
What can I tell you? It's not been my experience -- with cheaters or cheatees -- that the attractiveness of the "opportunity" has anything to do with the cheating.

I found it strange that you would say I must have heard that from someone -- as if I couldn't form my own opinion without having heard it somewhere.

sebastian_dangerfield 12-07-2009 02:16 PM
Re: Does he have enough $$ to pay them all?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThurgreedMarshall (Post 409535)
You have extremely strange friends. I have many friends who still cheat (and I did a fair amount of cheating in the past) and, almost without fail, the women they cheat with are younger, prettier and have hotter bodies.

TM
Generally true, but there are those cases where people start sleeping with co-workers or acquaintances with whom they form more of an emotional bond. I've seen that.

Atticus Grinch 12-07-2009 02:20 PM
Re: Onan na na, Onan na na, hey hey hey, goodbye
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 409540)
I'm pretty sure Jesus isn't mentioned in Genesis.
It's a curious thing that the wingnuts who insist that the Bible be interpreted literally are capable of such feats of metaphor and allusion as to cause the entire Torah to play Episodes I-III to the Gospels' original Star Wars Trilogy.

ThurgreedMarshall 12-07-2009 02:21 PM
Re: Does he have enough $$ to pay them all?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield (Post 409550)
Generally true, but there are those cases where people start sleeping with co-workers or acquaintances with whom they form more of an emotional bond. I've seen that.
Yes. That's why I said, "almost without fail."

TM

sebastian_dangerfield 12-07-2009 02:26 PM
Re: Does he have enough $$ to pay them all?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 409549)
What can I tell you? It's not been my experience -- with cheaters or cheatees -- that the attractiveness of the "opportunity" has anything to do with the cheating.

I found it strange that you would say I must have heard that from someone -- as if I couldn't form my own opinion without having heard it somewhere.
YMMV. What can I say.

On the other thing, you know me well enough to know I've far more respect for you than to assume something like that. It just sounds a lot like something I've heard coming from someone close to me for many years. Apologies on being overly-broad with the rhetoric.

But I will admit having a jaded view of how men and women process information about cheating. Whenever I've heard women discuss their friends' divorces/marriage issues, etc..., my female friends will include some line about how hot their cheated-on friend is, and how they can't believe the guy would sleep with the other chick. Then I see the other woman and she's way hotter than the cheated-on woman and I can't help thinking there's a bit of wishful thinking going on... That the women don't want to admit that, at least physically, the guy was trading up.

I also see this in the way women evaluate the attractiveness of other women. I'll easily tell you which of my male friends is ugly or attractive. No skin off my nose. But when I ask a woman for an evaluation of another woman there's always a complimentary angle to the evaluation. The subject at hand could be uglier than sin, but she'll be described as having a "wonderful smile." There's nothing wrong with this, of course. It's nice and kind, I guess, to want to see mistresses as unattractive, and the women cheated-on as wonderful. Kind of a supporting-the-underdog kind of thing. And it's nice to see everyone's best qualities. But reality's reality, and the reality I see is that most guys I know who cheat do it with more attractive women.

("Most" being the most important word here.)

Did you just call me Coltrane? 12-07-2009 02:32 PM
Tiger's Porn Star
 
Tiger's porn star mistress starred in the films "Descent Into Bondage" and "Diary of a Horny Housewife".

Those are two of the most disappointing porn titles I've ever read. It's like they're not even trying.

Hank Chinaski 12-07-2009 02:32 PM
Re: Does he have enough $$ to pay them all?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThurgreedMarshall (Post 409530)
i meant to say billionaire, and i'd expect some privacy that likely wouldn't be found in a hooters' outfit.

Did you just call me Coltrane? 12-07-2009 02:39 PM
Re: Early Lines
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by LessinSF (Post 409545)
At first blush, I like Oregon and Boise State:

OHIO ST +3.5
OREGON -3.5

CINCINNATI U +10.0
FLORIDA -10.0

BOISE ST +8.0
TCU -8.0

IOWA +3.5
GEORGIA TECH -3.5

TEXAS +5.0
ALABAMA -5.0
Always bet against the Big Ten.

Are there any online sites that will take my money? Or did Bush screw that up, too?

cheval de frise 12-07-2009 02:39 PM
Me so pre-Civil Rights era
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Atticus Grinch (Post 409551)
It's a curious thing that the wingnuts who insist that the Bible be interpreted literally are capable of such feats of metaphor and allusion as to cause the entire Torah to play Episodes I-III to the Gospels' original Star Wars Trilogy.
I'm pretty sure Jar-Jar Binks isn't mentioned in the Torah.

CDF

Hank Chinaski 12-07-2009 02:39 PM
Re: Does he have enough $$ to pay them all?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield (Post 409554)
YMMV. What can I say.

On the other thing, you know me well enough to know I've far more respect for you than to assume something like that. It just sounds a lot like something I've heard coming from someone close to me for many years. Apologies on being overly-broad with the rhetoric.

But I will admit having a jaded view of how men and women process information about cheating. Whenever I've heard women discuss their friends' divorces/marriage issues, etc..., my female friends will include some line about how hot their cheated-on friend is, and how they can't believe the guy would sleep with the other chick. Then I see the other woman and she's way hotter than the cheated-on woman and I can't help thinking there's a bit of wishful thinking going on... That the women don't want to admit that, at least physically, the guy was trading up.

I also see this in the way women evaluate the attractiveness of other women. I'll easily tell you which of my male friends is ugly or attractive. No skin off my nose. But when I ask a woman for an evaluation of another woman there's always a complimentary angle to the evaluation. The subject at hand could be uglier than sin, but she'll be described as having a "wonderful smile." There's nothing wrong with this, of course. It's nice and kind, I guess, to want to see mistresses as unattractive, and the women cheated-on as wonderful. Kind of a supporting-the-underdog kind of thing. And it's nice to see everyone's best qualities. But reality's reality, and the reality I see is that most guys I know who cheat do it with more attractive women.

("Most" being the most important word here.)
hmmmm, I've heard the woman who the guy cheats with is "a sleeze ball," or some such, and she might be quite attractive- but if she is described as chubby or ugly that has been sort of accurate.

ThurgreedMarshall 12-07-2009 02:42 PM
Re: Does he have enough $$ to pay them all?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hank Chinaski (Post 409558)
i meant to say billionaire, and i'd expect some privacy that likely wouldn't be found in a hooters' outfit.
I'm sorry. I thought you said, "Bang" not "cheat with." If you're married and a billionaire, I believe you. You probably wouldn't bang a hooters girl. If you weren't married, there is no doubt in my mind that you would if you found a hot one.

TM

Sidd Finch 12-07-2009 02:42 PM
Re: Does he have enough $$ to pay them all?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dtb (Post 409549)
What can I tell you? It's not been my experience -- with cheaters or cheatees -- that the attractiveness of the "opportunity" has anything to do with the cheating.

I found it strange that you would say I must have heard that from someone -- as if I couldn't form my own opinion without having heard it somewhere.
Are you trying to tell us something?

Sidd Finch 12-07-2009 02:43 PM
Re: Does he have enough $$ to pay them all?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield (Post 409550)
Generally true, but there are those cases where people start sleeping with co-workers or acquaintances with whom they form more of an emotional bond. I've seen that.
Does "she promised me regular blowjobs" constitute an emotional bond?

Hank Chinaski 12-07-2009 02:45 PM
Re: Does he have enough $$ to pay them all?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by thurgreedmarshall (Post 409566)
i'm sorry. I thought you said, "bang" not "cheat with." if you're married and a billionaire, i believe you. You probably wouldn't bang a hooters girl. If you weren't married, there is no doubt in my mind that you would if you found a hot one.

Tm
2.

LessinSF 12-07-2009 02:48 PM
Re: Early Lines
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Did you just call me Coltrane? (Post 409562)
Always bet against the Big Ten.

Are there any online sites that will take my money? Or did Bush screw that up, too?
I use a friend's site - World's Sports Exchange - and, although it has become harder, one can still deposit with them.

cheval de frise 12-07-2009 02:51 PM
Re: Does he have enough $$ to pay them all?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sidd Finch (Post 409568)
Does "she promised me regular blowjobs" constitute an emotional bond?
Yes. It's like Krazy Glue.

CDF

evenodds 12-07-2009 02:59 PM
Re: Does he have enough $$ to pay them all?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by greatwhitenorthchick (Post 409536)
This is what "motivated to cheat" means.

I only know why I have cheated in the past. I imagine other people do it for the same reasons I did, or if they want some excitement, or some "strange" or for whatever reason. If you want to do it, you'll do it, and all I'm saying is that if you really want to cheat, you'll do it with someone halfway acceptable. You won't be like, no, I'm holding out for Brad Pitt, or whoever.
I was in a philosophical discussion about rich guy cheating this weekend and the men were all terribly offended by how stupid Tiger Woods was. The most frequently tossed out comment was "you have to take care of your girls!" because "when you have a lot to lose you need to protect your shit by taking care of them." Also, the girls need to have something going on in their lives professionally so they are less willing to sell you out.

The men could not understand the randomness and lack of preparation. There are basically two schools of thought -- either everyone is random and meaningless or everyone is a girlfriend. The problem for Tiger arose when one girlfriend found out about another girlfriend and then decided to blab to the press and all these other randoms came out of the woodwork. If he had taken better care of the first one, she would not have been ready to talk to US weekly and the whole chain of events would not have been set in motion.

LessinSF 12-07-2009 03:16 PM
How Many of These Apply Here Equally Well?
 
http://crookedtimber.org/2009/11/22/...on-commenters/ (list of types of commenters on blogs). Number 4 is me on religion:

Quote:
4. The commenter who uses every comment as a peg on which to hang his (yes, “his”) own obsessions about, e.g. analytical philosophy, populism, Palestine, etc

Sidd Finch 12-07-2009 03:18 PM
Re: Tiger's Porn Star
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Did you just call me Coltrane? (Post 409557)
Tiger's porn star mistress starred in the films "Descent Into Bondage" and "Diary of a Horny Housewife".

Those are two of the most disappointing porn titles I've ever read. It's like they're not even trying.
Are you kidding? Compared to her other titles -- like “OMG, Stop Tickling Me” -- those are Dostoevsky.

Hank Chinaski 12-07-2009 03:23 PM
Re: Tiger's Porn Star
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sidd Finch (Post 409590)
Are you kidding? Compared to her other titles -- like “OMG, Stop Tickling Me” -- those are Dostoevsky.
fwiw, looking at IMDB she seems to be a bondage/tickle specialist. I'm sure you'd want that content quite clear in your title-

Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) 12-07-2009 04:19 PM
Re: At the very least...
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by greatwhitenorthchick (Post 409499)
I didn't realize that was a recycled one. I need a new humor injection.
Apparently our newest member, GWNC, did not get the message about recycling.

greatwhitenorthchick 12-07-2009 04:27 PM
Re: At the very least...
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) (Post 409598)
Apparently our newest member, GWNC, did not get the message about recycling.
I keep getting locked out, so I thought I'd create an alter-ego. Unfortunately, she kept getting locked out too. I think it's my system and cookies or something.

taxwonk 12-07-2009 04:46 PM
Re: At the very least...
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield (Post 409498)
Newton.

(If you haven't, Penske, do a Google image search for "Helmut Newton." The perfect marriage of high art and smut.)
In my dreams of future glory, I channel the genius that was Helmut Newton.

Atticus Grinch 12-07-2009 05:00 PM
Re: At the very least...
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by taxwonk (Post 409611)
In my dreams of future glory, I channel the genius that was Helmut Newton.
AON, is asexuality pathological? If not, should it be?

One of the weirder side effects of living in a predominately gay-friendly region is that there are certain unattached people of a certain age that have never been married or otherwise paired and seem to have no dating life whatsoever. The conventional wisdom in the past was that they were secretly gay, NTTAWWT, but that has grown increasingly implausible in a time and place where being gay is not a detriment, and in fact would be actively celebrated if part of one's public life.

One wonders whether we have misdiagnosed generations of bachelor uncles and spinster aunts as gay and repressed.

Adder 12-07-2009 05:08 PM
Re: At the very least...
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Atticus Grinch (Post 409612)
One of the weirder side effects of living in a predominately gay-friendly region is that there are certain unattached people of a certain age that have never been married or otherwise paired and seem to have no dating life whatsoever.
Hi!

greatwhitenorthchick 12-07-2009 05:09 PM
Re: At the very least...
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Atticus Grinch (Post 409612)
AON, is asexuality pathological? If not, should it be?

One of the weirder side effects of living in a predominately gay-friendly region is that there are certain unattached people of a certain age that have never been married or otherwise paired and seem to have no dating life whatsoever. The conventional wisdom in the past was that they were secretly gay, NTTAWWT, but that has grown increasingly implausible in a time and place where being gay is not a detriment, and in fact would be actively celebrated if part of one's public life.

One wonders whether we have misdiagnosed generations of bachelor uncles and spinster aunts as gay and repressed.
I know a group of women in their late 40s-early 50s, and as far as I know, they are not gay and do not date/have sex. I've known them ever since I moved to NY, so about 10 years (we took a class together, hit it off, and now get together to go to dinner occasionally). One of them told me her last date was 15 years ago. Another said she tried internet dating, didn't like it, and stopped (this was five years ago -- as far as I know, she hasn't had a date since) -- she told me she did have a boyfriend in her 30s. They are lovely people and we always have a lot to talk about, never about men, but I think they are celibate. I always used to think to myself -- how can someone be celibate -- they must be getting something, somewhere, but more and more, I do not think they are getting anything, anywhere. Like spinster aunts.

ThurgreedMarshall 12-07-2009 05:12 PM
Re: At the very least...
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Atticus Grinch (Post 409612)
AON, is asexuality pathological? If not, should it be?

One of the weirder side effects of living in a predominately gay-friendly region is that there are certain unattached people of a certain age that have never been married or otherwise paired and seem to have no dating life whatsoever. The conventional wisdom in the past was that they were secretly gay, NTTAWWT, but that has grown increasingly implausible in a time and place where being gay is not a detriment, and in fact would be actively celebrated if part of one's public life.

One wonders whether we have misdiagnosed generations of bachelor uncles and spinster aunts as gay and repressed.
Does one?

TM

Adder 12-07-2009 05:15 PM
Re: At the very least...
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by greatwhitenorthchick (Post 409616)
I know a group of women in their late 40s-early 50s, and as far as I know, they are not gay and do not date/have sex. I've known them ever since I moved to NY, so about 10 years (we took a class together, hit it off, and now get together to go to dinner occasionally). One of them told me her last date was 15 years ago. Another said she tried internet dating, didn't like it, and stopped (this was five years ago -- as far as I know, she hasn't had a date since) -- she told me she did have a boyfriend in her 30s. They are lovely people and we always have a lot to talk about, never about men, but I think they are celibate. I always used to think to myself -- how can someone be celibate -- they must be getting something, somewhere, but more and more, I do not think they are getting anything, anywhere. Like spinster aunts.
I our prudish anti-sex society, one has to wonder whether women in this category, in particular, never really figured out how their sexuality works.

Atticus Grinch 12-07-2009 05:15 PM
Re: At the very least...
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThurgreedMarshall (Post 409617)
Does one?

TM
You should meet me IRL. I'm even more of an ass there than here.

cheval de frise 12-07-2009 05:16 PM
Did he wear a feather boa?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sidd Finch (Post 409590)
Are you kidding? Compared to her other titles -- like “OMG, Stop Tickling Me” -- those are Dostoevsky.
I thought you were kidding about that title until I saw an article mentioning it.

CDF

Gattigap 12-07-2009 05:16 PM
Re: At the very least...
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by greatwhitenorthchick (Post 409616)
I know a group of women in their late 40s-early 50s, and as far as I know, they are not gay and do not date/have sex. I've known them ever since I moved to NY, so about 10 years (we took a class together, hit it off, and now get together to go to dinner occasionally). One of them told me her last date was 15 years ago. Another said she tried internet dating, didn't like it, and stopped (this was five years ago -- as far as I know, she hasn't had a date since) -- she told me she did have a boyfriend in her 30s. They are lovely people and we always have a lot to talk about, never about men, but I think they are celibate. I always used to think to myself -- how can someone be celibate -- they must be getting something, somewhere, but more and more, I do not think they are getting anything, anywhere. Like spinster aunts.

Of the 8 million stories in the naked city, this has been the clothed one.

ThurgreedMarshall 12-07-2009 05:16 PM
Fresh to Def.
 
Am I the only nerd who must skip down to the Merriam Webster site on google when looking up a word because the "Free Dictionary" just ain't gonna cut it?

TM

ThurgreedMarshall 12-07-2009 05:17 PM
Re: At the very least...
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Atticus Grinch (Post 409620)
You should meet me IRL. I'm even more of an ass there than here.
Me too! We'll have so much to talk about.

TM

pony_trekker 12-07-2009 05:18 PM
Every once and a while,
 
when soliciting opinions from this motley crew of fucking retards here, I will get the wonderful suggestion?

"Have you searched the internet?"


I.

Am.

Not.

Joking.

And, when I respond to the question "What's that?" with "JFGI" I always get "What does that mean?"

Atticus Grinch 12-07-2009 05:23 PM
Re: At the very least...
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by greatwhitenorthchick (Post 409616)
I know a group of women in their late 40s-early 50s, and as far as I know, they are not gay and do not date/have sex. I've known them ever since I moved to NY, so about 10 years (we took a class together, hit it off, and now get together to go to dinner occasionally). One of them told me her last date was 15 years ago. Another said she tried internet dating, didn't like it, and stopped (this was five years ago -- as far as I know, she hasn't had a date since) -- she told me she did have a boyfriend in her 30s. They are lovely people and we always have a lot to talk about, never about men, but I think they are celibate. I always used to think to myself -- how can someone be celibate -- they must be getting something, somewhere, but more and more, I do not think they are getting anything, anywhere. Like spinster aunts.
If asexuality exists, it seems pretty important to distinguish it from "evening with bubble bath and Rabbit are the best option my self-esteem permits right now." It probably comes down to fantasy life, and self-reported pleasures. I must say, sex without physical pleasure sounds like misery, but Hank's wife has apparently made peace with it.

How soon can we judge the asexual who don't pair off and marry for cuddles and financial stability, like we're starting to do with the gays who fought so hard for marriage rights but inconsistently avail themselves of the benefit of lifelong monogamy?

taxwonk 12-07-2009 05:24 PM
Re: Does he have enough $$ to pay them all?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by greatwhitenorthchick (Post 409539)
This may be only true of big cities. Where I grew up, the way dtb tells it is closer to reality.
Big, fat, red, 2.

Pretty Little Flower 12-07-2009 05:26 PM
Re: At the very least...
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThurgreedMarshall (Post 409617)
Does one?

TM
Yes. One and only one.

Pretty Little Flower 12-07-2009 05:27 PM
Re: At the very least...
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Atticus Grinch (Post 409620)
You should meet me IRL. I'm even more of an ass there than here.
Now I'm confused. Your second sentence seems to undercut your first.

Oops, I wrote the above before seeing Thurgreed's response. Apparently, for some, the fact that you are more of an ass IRL makes you all the more compelling.

Atticus Grinch 12-07-2009 05:27 PM
Re: Does he have enough $$ to pay them all?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by taxwonk (Post 409628)
Big, fat, red, 2.
You seem to lack the courage of your convictions.

Warmly,
The Italics

taxwonk 12-07-2009 05:28 PM
Re: Does he have enough $$ to pay them all?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield (Post 409550)
Generally true, but there are those cases where people start sleeping with co-workers or acquaintances with whom they form more of an emotional bond. I've seen that.
We have to make allowances for Thurgreed. He's more shallow than the rest of us; so appearance is more important.


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