With an inflatable kayak?

http://urec.wsu.edu/urec/orc/rental/details/lynx1.jpg

I get high and listen to Mantovani and the inner stress just floats away.

Daddy?

Wouldn't it be dangerous to have one of those if you were a compulsive shaver?

I've always heard them referred to as duckies. Took one down the Rouge once. Fun, but hard to surf.

Even worse - If you whap your one-hitter against the side, it melts a hole and you sink.

[Surfer dude]Whoa. Bummer dude.[/Surfer dude]

Honey Ryder Cup
 

Woods and Mickelson just lost to fucking Paddy Harrington and Colin Montgomerie. What the fuck?

The US is down 2-0 (about to be 3-0) and we're all square in one match. So, we could get swept this morning.

How is it that these guys can't seem to play together? You wouldn't think that the ability to play as a team would be so important in these matches, but it's a skill our guys just don't seem to have. Anyone have a theory on this?

Whoever had Larry Brown (of the latest Dream Team shame*) give a motivational speech to our players wasn't thinking.

TM

* Yez, Hank. I know Brown proved that good defense and a team-first mentality could beat seemingly overwhelming talent in the NBA, but what has he done for me lately?

Honey Ryder Cup
 

My office is a mile from Oakland Hills. Big fat europeans are limiting my lunch options. Orthodonists from New Jersey and car dealers from Illinois are making it hard to find a spot in my parking deck. You think I give a fuck where some trophy is going?

Brown spoke? That is stupid. I heard D. Trump opened the tournament.

Happy you know what to you know who!!!!!
 

A certain special someone is celebrating a certain special day today! I think you know who you are! Have a great certain special day, Mr. or Ms. certain special someone!

A Very Special Day
 

Everything is planned. We will be together soon and you will receive my Initial Private Offering. Happy birthday. You are the best!!!

Was Up?
 

As you wish.

When did Oprah revive her book club? I thought she scuttled it after the fuss with Jonathan Franzen wanting to take the money but also let everyone know that he was better and artier than her readers.

A few months ago, I think -- I remember seeing "new" copies of a Steinback book on the front tables at the local Barnes & Borders each bearing a sticker reading "The Classic Which Revived Oprah's Book Club!"

A Very Special Day
 

Thanks, Coltrane, but I've reconsidered. The prospect of a Proxy Fight, followed by a Poison Pill, is just too much for me. I'll have to take a Leveraged Buyout.

FBA
 

I have the weird feeling that the FB has a stalker, or Bin Ladin is issuing instructions to his minions, or there are more FB hookups than I thought.