Brazilian
 

Like you, of all people, know from vulgar.

not7yS

What's next, an article on product recalls at Cogsworth's Cogs?
 

Apropos of my "where are the flying cars I was promised?" rant of the other day, Slate has an article on why we don't have flying cars.

The short answer? According to the author: What the flying-car faithful tend to ignore are the concept's mundane flaws. Start with what may sound like a minor concern—noise ... It seems unlikely that suburban America, where the background noise rarely rises above 70 decibels, would put up with the rush-hour roar as commuters rev their engines.

Grumble.

Brazilian
 

It's a threat to the husband of the esthetician. I don't think he would want his wife waxing/trimming up our pubic hair.

"Your wife was wonderful with my balls."

Oh, and that's the only emoticon that came close. I wasn't referring to butts, just the pubic area.

Brazilian
 

For some reason I cannot find it again, but I originally found it in the "Mothers who think" archive. (Why is there no archive for "Mothers who don't think"?)

Brazilian
 

Ah, I gotcha. It's okay to rip hair by the root out of strangers' scrotums (scroti?), but not people you know.

Brazilian
 

Somehow I'm doubting she'd ever be able to look at them the same way. Of course, it's likely the pain of that emotion would be felt even more heavily by the guys ("wait, you're the chick who shaved my ass . . . gotta run")

Brazilian
 

I wondered about the location of the article too and did a search for "wax" and both came up.

Gwyneth piece

"Mother" piece

"Personal" services
 

Isn't that true of most personal services? You want them to be impersonal. I don't want to see my doctor in a social setting ("you really shouldn't eat so much of that steak, what with your colon problems"). I don't want my accountant to know me ("hmm, how do you afford that house on your income"). Nor a therapist ("you really should hit on that woman with more confidence, as we discussed").

If (and I use the contrary-to-fact subjunctive advisedly), I were to want my balls shaved, I certainly would not go to a friend, or a friend's wife, for the service.

Singh apologizes to Sorenstam
 

I'd like to address with the dumbest thing you said first, so let's start with this:
If I completely pick apart your idiotic argument and call you a moron at the same time, it is not "material." Material is "yo mama dropped you on your dented, brainless head one too many times." What I did was state that you are stupid for making the wrong argument and doing it poorly. So, get it straight.


The problem is, you don't listen. I said she doesn't deserve to be in the tournament. She is playing to make a statement: "Girls can compete with boys at the highest level" or "At the very least, I can compete with boys at the highest level." To make such a statement, you should qualify for the tournament. She is being let in. Therefore, why she is being let in or how she is being let in is irrelevant. I already said that I have no problem with the chick who qualified for the Greater Hartford. Pay attention.

If I were you, I would have been tired of it long ago when it was clear you had no idea what you were talking about.

TM

"Personal" services
 

Indeed. Many many moons ago, when I was going to a therapist, she showed up in the bar I was working and proceeded to get tipsy, and I had to serve her. It was pure coincidence - she had no idea where I worked and it was a popular place so why shouldn't she go there (she didn't need to sit at the bar though, that was weird). But still it was awful - some worlds just shouldn't collide. I did not go back to her after that.

"Personal" services
 

"So there's this drunk chick at the bar. And she's going on and on about how her job sucks...huh...whatshedo?...oh, she's a therapist...and she's ranting and raving about how she HAS TO LISTEN to all these loons day in and day out...and its driving her to drink...I know, small violin...wha?...oh, she was getting drunk and had a nice rack, so I let her rant....anyway - GET THIS, she starts talking about one of her lunatics, right...some nutjob from Canada who has these delusions of becoming a lawyer some day - meanwhile, shes banging every hockey player that passes thru town...Eh? Yeah, the hockey bear in the Labatt commerical, yeah, she fucked him too...but get this, apparently, this chick has a thing for Don Cherry....

"Personal" services
 

Aha! I *knew* that gwnc was the hot chick in the blue dress who says "oooooh, you must be so hungry" to the hockey bear in that Labatt commercial!

Oh, and speaking of chicks and sports, Manon Rheume played in goal for the Lightning (hockey and Florida --- please) in a preseason game back in the day. And apropos of nothing, she was a cutie -- I'm sure that if she looked like a guy that her picture wouldn't have graced the pages of newspapers everywhere.

"Personal" services
 

Speaking of cuties, Not Bob, I am loving your new avatar, and I think it deserves public appreciation.

Rockford was yummy.

Edited to note that while the misplaced modifier in the sentence above suggests that I think I am cute, what I really mean to say is that I think both Not Bob and young James Garner are cute.

Happy Gilmore
 

Annika earned about $2.8 million last year from LPGA purses. Her endorsement deals weren't too shabby either, and she also had some silly season events like Battle at Bighorn. Only 7 men earned more in PGA purses than did Annika. No tear in my eye, at least for her. The dames who're struggling to make the cut each week, they could sure use some bigger purses.

Singh apologizes to Sorenstam
 

Barely.

Happy Gilmore
 

"Dames"? Are they British?

Happy Gilmore
 

Exactly. So don't you think that all of the hype generated by Annika is going to make the LPGA better for everyone involved? Much like paying Julia Roberts and Demi Moore an insane amount of $$ per movie raises the bar for all other decent female actresses?

realization
 

My easily addled mind has been getting spookyfish and robustpuppy confused all day today. Mainly because I cannot locate a care for the seemingly never-ending arguing posts between TM and SF (not RP) today. Holy freaking cow, any litigators around?

Anyway the whole [adjective][animal] moniker thing has me all jumbled up despite that fact that one is a chica and one is a dude. Thank god PLF stuck with a [plant] instead of an [animal].

n(not to be confused with notfromhere or not bob)cs

Hairy butts
 

The SFC is about half Scandinavian, and very (and I mean very--the "furry" in SFC) hairy from the bottom of his ribcage to just short of the top of his head--kind of like a cropped tee hairshirt (plus thick beard). However, his legs and butt are not particularly hairy.

My brothers, with similar Scandinavian-ness, also do not have hairy butts--not that I've actually seen them, but it would be bizarre to have a hairy butt but not-particularly-hairy legs and zero chest hair. My brothers also are completely incapable of growing anything resembling a beard (though one of them does have a treasure trail).

So maybe Scandinavian = non-hairy butt, and you're getting a dominant hairy-butt gene from some other ancestor, Ollie.

tm

"Personal" services
 

I know people on whose scrota I would like to spread hot wax and then rip out all hairs by the roots.

Hairy butts
 

This strikes me as a particularly good board motto, if we had such things.

E/O

"Personal" services
 

You are so wrong! I have never even met that bear. And ... that's it.

Singh apologizes to Sorenstam
 

Maybe she's not trying to make a statement. Maybe she just wants to play golf with a more competitive crowd.

Hairy butts
 

Who says we don't?

Hi everyone, how ya been?

L

realization
 

Maybe it's not the fighting with TM but rather the flirting with bilmore that has you confusing the two of us.

And I get confused when two posters have the same avatar. It took a while to distinguish Ritz from fufu, and I think the former is a dude and the latter a chick, but I hope neither will be insulted if I am wrong.

Hairy butts
 

Yes! that is what it is more commonly called, not the happy trail. If they called the wax the Treasure Trail I would have immediately known what it was referring to.

realization
 

Yeah, I'm a chick. It threw me when I first saw Ritz's using the fufu avatar. I'm such a techno neophyte that I'm unable to do whatever has to be done to use other photographs out there in e-world as an avatar. Zut alors!

realization
 

Click here for everything you need to know about avatars: http://www.lawtalkers.com/forums/sho...s=&threadid=49

E/O

AI Addendum
 

One of the reasons Kim's rhythm was off on her second song, and perhaps a reason why Ruben seemed out of breath on Signed, Sealed, Delivered--they seemed to be having some stage management issues. They started the music early and Kim practically had to run to get to the mike, and still missed the first few notes of the song.

tm

AI Addendum
 

I totally agree about Kim - noticed it big time. Didn't see the same thing re Ruben. By the way, I voted lots last night for Ruben. Got through on my cell phone about 30% of the time. The s/o couldn't get through once for Kim from the land-line. But then we switched phones, and she had about the same success rate for Kim that I did for Ruben. So I don't know what to make of that, except that Fox probably has dedicated cell-response lines that weren't as busy. By the way, I tried to vote for Clay once, just to see, and got through on the first try. Take that for what it's worth.

I guess this board has quieted down now that everyone's glued to the 1 hour results show. Between that and the Monday special bio of the 2 finalists, I think Fox has sunk to a new low. 3 hours of AI next week. HAVE YOU NO SHAME, FOX? HAVE YOU NO SHAME?

AI Addendum
 

only 3 Hours?

the FAT, HAPPY GUY

a "WOMAN OF COLOR"

and the HOMO

Sounds more like the makings of a 24 episode sitcom.

not7y(get Norman Lear on the phone)S

One American Life
 

For those of you who grew up in a matching-bicycles, vanilla upper-middle class hamlet, does Annie Dillard's "One American Life" catch the feel? My rule of thumbe would be whether you went though high school without having any friends that smoked crack.

One American Life
 

Rather inapt rule if you're looking for inclusiveness.

Now, if you had said laudanum . . .

One American Life
 

Golly gee, I didn't know anyone who smoked crack OR laudanum.

I must have had a super duper vanilla child hood.

AI Results
 

Bye bye Kim. Not at all unexpected, but still a damn shame. Don't know how she could sing like that with the tears welling up. Clay was more than a little teary, too.

The group numbers sound great with this year's finalists--they're on the whole way better musicians than last year's crop. Speaking of which, Tamyra Gray sounded way worse than I ever remember her sounding last year--what's with the quaver? Justin Guarini had a waaaaayyy better arrangement of Unchained Melody than they saddled Clay with last night. He was weak on the low notes, and doesn't have the beautiful tone of either Clay or Ruben, but he's still a great performer.

My favorite moment of the whole evening was the shot of Clay almost losing his arm to the helicopter rotor. That and the way he threw.

tm

Singh apologizes to Sorenstam
 

Actually, I think women perform better than men in sport shooting because they have lower heartrates (which supposedly is a benefit in sport shooting). I tried to back this claim by comparing world records, but as I am not a sport shooter, I can't really read the world records, so I don't know if you want a high or low score. By the way, I'm going to say that shooting is a sport because their official governing bodies call it "sport shooting." Plus, sometimes you run in some sport shooting events (why, I dont know, I've already told you I'm not good at this stuff. I would get frustrated by that duck hunt game on Nintendo that Colin Farrell apparently excelled at.)

Maybe Eagle Scout earned his Rifle and Shotgun merit badge and can help resolve this matter. (Not surprisingly, the Rifle and Shotgun merit badge is a bullseye.)

Edited to add the part about shooting being a sport after reading a couple pages of posts about a debate topic that should only be debated, beer in hand, in front of a television during halftime.

Matrix Reloaded
 

I saw the sneak preview of Matrix Reloaded and have a few thoughts:

First, if you're a man, and you're thinking about wearing leather pants in public, here's a quiz...

Which one of the following best desribes you?
(a) Lead Singer in Rock band
(b) Biker Gang Member
(c) Pale, Scrawny Guy

If you answered (a) or (b), feel free to wear leather pants. If you answered (c), I'm allowed to laugh openly at you.

As for the movie, it's good. Reviews have been mixed, although I don't remember loving The Matrix when it first came out. I think reviewers might be making too much out of the first one, so that the second one inevitably suffers by comparison.

The special effects carry the day here. Even those who think the movie had too much expository dialogue can't deny that there are two set pieces that are worth the price of admission. The first is "The Burly Brawl." This is a fight scene between Neo (Keanu Reeves) and Agent Smith 2.0 (the excellent Hugo Weaving). The twist here is that Agent Smith has figured out how to copy himself, so it's Neo versus about 100 Agent Smiths. As Keanu would say, "Whoa." The computer programming and digital artistry required for this battle are just as revolutionary as "Bullet Time" was in the original.

The second main battle is a 14 minute fight scene that was staged on a 2 mile loop of highway that was built in Alameda for the film. You have bullets, two semi trucks, 'splosions, ninja swords, kung fu, twin albino ghost cyborgs (seriously), and a motorcycle stunt by Carrie-Anne Moss that must have happened when her agent was not on set because she's driving a bike, without a helmet, with a passenger, into hordes of oncoming traffic. I know stunt people were used, but Carrie-Anne apparently did most of the driving herself.

There are a few new characters, some plot twists, and a whole layers-upon-layers thing going on in this one. The Wachowski Brothers were smart enough to have most of the ponderous dialogue and plot points spoken in the butter-soaked voice of Lawrence Fishburne.

They're also smart enough to add Monica Bellucci to the cast as a temptress (big stretch for her) and to have one of the villains adopt a French accent. I would have thought that last one was a cheap shot at pleasing the NASCAR set, but production has been going on for years, so that decision must just be based on latent, ongoing hatred of the French.

Anyway, much better fight scenes and special effects than X2, probably not as good plot-wise as X2 (unless you're deep into the philosophy of the Matrix, in which case you were probably the guy wearing leather pants to the sneak preview), but much more impressive.

Helpful Hint: Stay after the credits for the trailer to Matrix Revolutions.

Pubic timmy
 

Aesthetician. And the Salon thing sounds about right. My late great friend used to call that line the "hairway to heaven" and I have seen it on chicks. It is not a good look- like a mustachioed chick (and I know one but would have no idea how to say anything to her).

Brazilian
 

I think this has finally killed my longstanding Ollie cybercrush. Baby, how could you do this to me? Now I have two posters who I will think "ass" when I see them.

One American Life
 

I know two chicks that smoked crack and apparently one was still struggling with it more than ten yeas later. The poor dear was a girly girl who used to sew her own dresses with her mom. No idea how that happened. The other gal was a year older and totally had the lopsided haircut and took the train into the city on weekeends and shopped at Flip. I guess they were trying to be different.

Which brings me to a question I pondered yesterday on my walk home. Why do people die their hair blue, pink, yellow, orange, whatever? It is never attractive and I woudl hardly say it makes you a punk or a rebel. What's the point?