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Replaced_Texan 09-28-2004 05:33 PM

Sex and Dating Question for the Group
 
Quote:

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Is the sleeping with other people a dealbreaker, or just something you like to be aware of?
Past experience has shown it is not a dealbreaker. Though it is sorta nice to know.

robustpuppy 09-28-2004 05:35 PM

Whore. Rhymes with bore.
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
I don't discuss numbers. Whoever I'm sleeping with knows he's not the first, and he may hear about other experiences I may have had, but I'm not keeping count. I don't care how many he's slept with either, unless he's sleeping with other people in the same time period that he's sleeping with me.
You were able to read that whole thing? Is that an admin obligation, or are you just indiscriminate?

Gattigap 09-28-2004 05:35 PM

Sex and Dating Question for the Group
 
Quote:

Originally posted by mmm3587
I am very nervous about sleeping with someone with fewer than 15 or so previous lovers, but I haven't met someone who number was too high.
I'm not terribly concerned about the number of previous lovers, but I must admit I've never heard of a minimum before.

What happens to those who don't make the cut? "Sorry, babe, but you've only had 10 previous lovers. Come back later."

I imagine that this strategy would also limit the fuckability pool, at least a little. Given the likely demographics, I don't know how Less, for example, could adhere to this standard.

notcasesensitive 09-28-2004 05:36 PM

Sex and Dating Question for the Group
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
I don't discuss numbers. Whoever I'm sleeping with knows he's not the first, and he may hear about other experiences I may have had, but I'm not keeping count. I don't care how many he's slept with either, unless he's sleeping with other people in the same time period that he's sleeping with me.
ohh, the counting thing has to do with vanilla sex? I thought mmm was asking about counting the number of guys you've peed on. I may need to recount.

Shape Shifter 09-28-2004 05:39 PM

Sex and Dating Question for the Group
 
Quote:

Originally posted by mmm3587
So, if you're in a long term relationship with someone, he has no general idea how many people you've slept with, and you have no general idea how many people he's slept with? Couldn't even put it into one of 0-15, 15-40, 40-100, 100+?
Do black guys count double?

barely_legal 09-28-2004 05:41 PM

why women live longer
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Oliver_Wendell_Ramone
I was going to make an entirely tasteless dead hooker joke, but the same general punch line sounds much less creepy coming from barely.
Thanks. I think.



On topic, I've never slept with a guy on a first date b/c I'm not a dirty whore, but I've never had a long-term relationship either. So I hope that was helpful.

Really on topic, I remember reading a book by Fay Weldon a few years ago (I think it was Trouble, but not positive) in which her main characters slept together right after meeting each other. The author opined that although many people thought that sleeping together after a first date destroyed any potential for a long-term relationship, what really happened was just that the relationship was fast-forwarded and if it would have been a successful relationship absent the early fuck, it still will be and if it wouldn't have worked out for other reasons, the early fuck will make those reasons stand out more clearly.

The moral of this post is that I read too much and don't have sex enough.

Replaced_Texan 09-28-2004 05:42 PM

Sex and Dating Question for the Group
 
Quote:

Originally posted by mmm3587
So, if you're in a long term relationship with someone, he has no general idea how many people you've slept with, and you have no general idea how many people he's slept with? Couldn't even put it into one of 0-15, 15-40, 40-100, 100+?
It's been awhile since I've been in a long term relationship, but the last one I was in, we talked about sex a lot. We talked about what worked and what didn't work, what we liked and didn't like, etc. It wasn't really an attempt to find out about his or my past, but more of an attempt to find out what we liked sexually. Plus, I like to talk about sex. I had a general idea that he had a fair number of partners in the past, and I think he got a general idea of what my experience level was. We were both tested for a variety of things (including HPV and HIV) and the condoms came off two or three months afterwards. Condom went back on the last time I slept with him because he'd had other partners.

mmm3587 09-28-2004 05:43 PM

Sex and Dating Question for the Group
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Gattigap
I'm not terribly concerned about the number of previous lovers, but I must admit I've never heard of a minimum before.

What happens to those who don't make the cut? "Sorry, babe, but you've only had 10 previous lovers. Come back later."

I imagine that this strategy would also limit the fuckability pool, at least a little. Given the likely demographics, I don't know how Less, for example, could adhere to this standard.
It's not a hard limit, but say that you, a virulent lad, were in the market for a lover. And you wanted to be with someone who had the skills and vigor requisite to satisfying and enjoying her experiences with a strapping, intelligent, successful law like yourself. And you were enamored with a young lass, but you found out she had only had one lover. That wouldn't make you wonder whether she would be a good lover?

Maybe it's more retrospective. Looking back on the women I have slept over my years of sexual activity, the ones with more experience and more lovers have been far more interesting and satisfying to me sexually, much more likely to orgasm from different kinds of sex, including oral sex, and generally just better lovers. The ones with few former lovers have been at the other end of the scale. Good sex is important to me, and I've observed this correlation. Maybe it's not a rule, but if the number of lovers a potential lover has had comes up before the initial sexual encounter, my spidey sense suspects lesser ability if she's only been with six dudes.

mmm3587 09-28-2004 05:44 PM

Sex and Dating Question for the Group
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Do black guys count double?
Each person has to come up with his or her own scheme for counting lovers based on activity, sex, race, lizardness, etc.

Shape Shifter 09-28-2004 05:45 PM

Sex and Dating Question for the Group
 
Quote:

Originally posted by mmm3587
It's not a hard limit, but say that you, a virulent lad, were in the market for a lover. And you wanted to be with someone who had the skills and vigor requisite to satisfying and enjoying her experiences with a strapping, intelligent, successful law like yourself. And you were enamored with a young lass, but you found out she had only had one lover. That wouldn't make you wonder whether she would be a good lover?
A good mentor often gains from the relationship.

Pretty Little Flower 09-28-2004 05:45 PM

Sex and Dating Question for the Group
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
Condom went back on the last time I slept with him because he'd had other partners.
The same condom?

Oliver_Wendell_Ramone 09-28-2004 05:46 PM

Sex and Dating Question for the Group
 
Quote:

Originally posted by mmm3587
It's not a hard limit, but say that you, a virulent lad, were in the market for a lover. And you wanted to be with someone who had the skills and vigor requisite to satisfying and enjoying her experiences with a strapping, intelligent, successful law like yourself. And you were enamored with a young lass, but you found out she had only had one lover. That wouldn't make you wonder whether she would be a good lover?

Maybe it's more retrospective. Looking back on the women I have slept over my years of sexual activity, the ones with more experience and more lovers have been far more interesting and satisfying to me sexually, much more likely to orgasm from different kinds of sex, including oral sex, and generally just better lovers. The ones with few former lovers have been at the other end of the scale. Good sex is important to me, and I've observed this correlation. Maybe it's not a rule, but if the number of lovers a potential lover has had comes up before the initial sexual encounter, my spidey sense suspects lesser ability if she's only been with six dudes.
It's all about the mentoring with you, isn't it?

eta: goddam it lizard, don't you ever rest?

mmm3587 09-28-2004 05:47 PM

Sex and Dating Question for the Group
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
Condom went back on the last time I slept with him because he'd had other partners.
You're only supposed to use it once.

Quote:

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
We were both tested for a variety of things (including HPV and HIV) and the condoms came off two or three months afterwards.
Given that men carry HPV without symptoms and can't be tested for it, it just seems that total number might factor into the speed with which people would decide not to use condoms.

eta DAMN YOU FLOWER!

LessinSF 09-28-2004 05:47 PM

Sex and Dating Question for the Group
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Gattigap
I'm not terribly concerned about the number of previous lovers, but I must admit I've never heard of a minimum before.

What happens to those who don't make the cut? "Sorry, babe, but you've only had 10 previous lovers. Come back later."

I imagine that this strategy would also limit the fuckability pool, at least a little. Given the likely demographics, I don't know how Less, for example, could adhere to this standard.
When you meet them wearing only a bra for a top at the Folsom Street Fair, the minimum is rebuttably presumed.

ltl/fb 09-28-2004 05:48 PM

Sex and Dating Question for the Group
 
Quote:

Originally posted by mmm3587
a virulent lad
I try to avoid fucking these. rp, this was in the first couple lines.


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