Humdrum
 

No no no. You got it all wrong. They're raging homosexuals.

TM

Vanilla
 

Beautiful. Agreed on Baskin Robbins MCC. Perfect sized chips. Great texture.

But none located near me...

n(probably better for my ass that way)cs

Humdrum
 

Tomorrow's match-up between Glavine and Maddux should be interesting. Both will allow runs early on so the question will be who has the bats and bullpen to overcome. The Braves have the arms to send in for Maddux if he gets too flighty. I don't think the Mets have what it takes to stop the bleed. When they took Glavine they forgot that he needed a strong outfield, really strong, to make it work. The Braves seem to have found a nice mix of fairly good pitching (with exceptions for the iffy 7th and 8th innings they have struggled with this season), highlight-film fielding (Giles and Furcal are amazing) and bats that are singing like never before (last night became the second team ever to lead off with 3 homers).

Anyone going? Braves/Mets games in NY just aren't as much fun since John Rocker left. :D

New discussion topic (sort of)
 

Bravo announces gay dating game

From the article:

"Boy Meets Boy," a six-episode series that will premiere in July, also twists reality show conventions by secretly including straight men among the pool of dating prospects. ... If one of the straight men is chosen at the end, he wins a cash prize. If the leading man chooses another gay man, the lead character wins the prize and an expense-paid vacation, he said.

Tofutti
 

THis begs the question, how can you marry someone who gives bad head?THis means that for all intents and purposes, you are kissing the chance to experience good head, ever, in your life, goodbye. Anyone?:yum:

and on an unrelated note, I noticed that the moon emoticon is called "mr". Coincidence?

New discussion topic (sort of)
 

That would kind of be where the conversation actually started.

Amazing Race 4
 

from realityblurred --

Twelve teams of two begin their race around the world for $1 million as The Amazing Race 4 debuts tonight at 8 p.m. ET with a 90-minute premiere. For the first time, the show won't be up against heavy time-slot competition as it takes over Survivor's position, airing opposite repeats on NBC. The show's creator and producer, Bertram van Munster, talks to TV Guide about the show, discussing the race's logistics (each location takes two weeks to prep) and why it took so long for this season to air ("I have no control over the programming of the show"). The Star Ledger discusses the show's evolution, saying it's "an even better drama than it is a travelogue." Critics have mixed reactions to the new season: The St. Louis Post says it's "breathlessly exciting" while The Beacon Journal says the show "seems a bit more gimmicky than its predecessors."

n(more gimmicky? that's what reality tv is all about!)cs

Tofutti
 

I don't know if the man I married gives good head because I never let him try having already decided long before I met him that I didn't like it. He kisses well though and is one of those very attentive men (both in and out of bed) so I imagine that he would probably give good head -- but since I don't like receiving, is there really any such thing?

Tofutti
 

You can learn to give good head I think. Though some people are just more enthusiastic than others. I gave a friend of mine detailed instructions recently on how to please his gf. He reported back that she, to put it mildly, enjoyed it very much. Before that he didn't feel he was doing very well. A little instruction is all it takes if the person is willing to try.

No, it isn't a coincidence, but it probably isn't for the reason you think. When I was defining smilies for this board, I left out all the sexual ones, well, because I am vanilla, and MR said he liked the moon one. I said ok, and put it back in, and since he liked it, I named it after him.

Humdrum
 

I think this would be a good board motto. For the LWK board.

Speaking of good head
 

Former President Bill Clinton (search) says in the future, a former two-term president should be able to return to office later in life -- but the Constitution would have to be amended.

Poor bastard must be jonesing for the good (albeit vanilla) sex he had while in office.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,88073,00.html

Tofutti
 

I thought you just said you didnt like it bc you never had good head. SO whose to say you never would have good head? That being said, your husband probalby sucks at it since he doesnt mind a life without it. My all time favorite book has a great quote on this subject. Its written in the first person and the woman describes how divine her new lover is at it. She says seven out of ten men perform like a horse at a salt lick (maybe it was a different animal), two out of ten cannot quite dispel the notion that they are mere inches from an anus and that magical one out of ten wields his tongue like a diviniong rod.

I myself have not found divining rod man yet, but that doent mean I am gonna give up on it.

Tofutti
 

That is right, I don't like it because when I had it I found it boring -- didn't do anything for me. I never said having good head would not be possible (of course, I suppose it could be that I have had it but still not enjoyed it but I guess we are assuming that good head would not be boring). I stopped looking before I met my husband. If the pleasure ever dies down maybe I will take a look at the head issue again to see if it would kick things up a notch.

Nebraska Declares War on Iowa?
 

I don't know if it's still the case, but all of the liquor stores in Iowa used to be state-owned (high prices, never open late) so gangs of drunken Swedes used to cross the border to buy MD20/20 in Nebraska. And now the Nebraskans are pissed?

AM(officer, there's nothing in MY trunk)M

Tofutti
 

That isn't my favorite either, mainly b/c while it is going on I find that I have to concentrate more on what feels good about it (if that makes any sense at all). But we still do that sometimes and it can be quite nice (no divining rod man in my life yet, though some are definitely better than others). Actually I think that vibrators might have made it less cool to me b/c once you get used to good constant pressure, the stuff that humans can do seems less consistent (and therefore the results are too).

Tofutti
 

I can give you the number of a guy who is a divining rod man. He LOVED giving head and was quite good at it. I had no complaints whatsoever. He got off on it, which certainly got me off.

New discussion topic (sort of)
 

Yeah, I guess I'm feeling a little evil today:devil:

Furniture in New York City
 

Can anyone recommend a place to get decent new furniture in NYC? I am endeavoring to avoid the cheap shit sold by Pottery Barn and Restoration Hardware.

I've purchased a few large things at Jensen's, but I've been advised that the items are too stylized.

Thank you in advance.

Dr. Worm

Tofutti
 

Sounds like the guy from Sex and the City. Mr. Pussy.

Furniture in New York City
 

Price range? Style? Room in the house you're looking to decorate? Look around, and see what you like first, before settling on one particular store.

If you see something you like, check and see if Design within Reach has it cheaper. Pottery Barn and Restoration Hardware actually have some well made furniture, though the problem is that everyone else has it too. Check out Crate & Barrel too. One or two items isn't going to make your house look like everyone else's.

Where is the Dead Horse
 

when you need him? Maybe his swayback has been completely broken.

I will even offer another subject. Anyone see this band "Boomcat" on the Tonight show last night? What the fuck was that? This anorexic girl with a screechy, nasal voice that wouldn't even get to go to LA on American Idol was singing some atrocious song I had never heard. After having a great performance by India.Arie the night before, if I was Jay Leno, I would have just stayed in my chair and fired my booker on screen. Unfortunately, upon switching to Letterman, I found Todd Rundgren doing what appeared to be an intentionally kitchy, lounge version of "Hello, It's Me." If if wasn't intentionally bad, Dave's booker should be not just fired, but summarily executed.

Tofutti
 

Wait a minute. Are you "going to lunch" with Mr. Kiss too? Fuck!!!!

Dad's Day
 

With Dad's Day fast approaching, does anyone have any brilliantly creative ideas? Preferably ones that do not involve aftershave or crappy gift certificates. Dad is impossible to shop for -- anything he wants he buys which leaves nothing for the rest of us to gift with. What will you be gifting to your dad?

Please, no vanilla sex references -- this is my dad for freaks sake.

Where is the Dead Horse
 

Yeah, I saw that last night. What the hell was that? I stayed up because I love "Hello it's me" and I knew it would be less than I expected, but that was just downright weird. It's hard to describe, but it's like he took singing lessons over the last 30 years and forgot what the original sounded like. Way too much vibrato and stylizing. On the other hand, Paul Schaefer rocks on piano - I wish I played half as good.

On another note - fuck the Mets. And fuck Art Howe. And fuck any league that doesn't have a designated hitter.:dance2:

There are worse things ...
 

It wouldn't hurt so much if she banged it on the wads of cash instead.

Vanilla - poll
 

:grinning:

Now, on this whole "vanilla" thing, cut it out. I like vanilla. Vanilla can be a wonderfully subtle treat. As with anything, there is good vanilla and bad vanilla, and good vanilla is super, perhaps superior to its flashier cousins. There is bad chocolate, and bad mint chip, too, but it is vanilla that always gets brought in for a drubbing. Hmmph.

So, on the other, I am curious - what activities do people (individuals) consider vani - oops, wonderbread?

Me:

Wonderbread:
missionary
chick on top
doggy
standing
floor
most furniture
cars
manual
oral
69
vouyerism (sp? whatever)
spanking
blindfold
light restraints
costumes/mild role playing
talking dirty
most electronic toys (vibrators)
food - external use or traditional vegetables
massage & exotic or edible oils
sex on pot, X or coke
one night stands
hiring a female prostitute (if male)

Non-Wonderbread:
animals (but larger livestock may be wonderbread, as may be tricks with dogs and spreadable food)
children
public
bondage (real bondage)
role-playing "intruder/rapist"
S&M
dom
food - internal use (other than the usual phallic vegetables)
custom made furniture (swings, see "S&M" and "bondage" above)
strap-ons (but maybe I'm wrong)
sex while tweaking or on heroin or halucinogens (I understand that isn't very easy, but I have a friend who loved having sex on acid until it all went horribly, horribly wrong one night)
orgies
sex with strangers
hiring a male prostitute (if female)

In between:
3 somes. I know it happens a fair amount, but ... it just seems all exotic and complicated to me. Or maybe it's really unusual and I've just met too many wild and crazy people.

BR(and no badmouthing vanilla)C

edited because I caught myself using "vanilla" perjoratively - sheesh!

Vanilla
 

Can this really be done? I've never seen gwinky naked, but ice cream is cold.

Vanilla - poll
 

This list reminds me of an old South Park episode where Mr. Garrison teaches sex ed to kindergartners, including such terms as "dirty sanchez" and other terms I had never heard and the OM was loath to define.

So, is "car" a position or a location?

Even(vroom-vroom)Odds

Vanilla - poll
 

"So what happened?"
"She's into it."
"Into what?"
"The menage. And not only that. She just called me and said she talked to the roommate and the roommate's into the menage too."
"That's unbelievable."
"Oh, it's a scene man."
"Do you ever just get down on your knees and thank god that you know me and have access to my dementia?"
"What are you talking about? I'm not goin' to do it."
"You're not goin to do it? What do you mean, You're not goin to do it?"
"I can't. I'm not an orgy guy."
"Are you crazy? This is like discovering Plutonium ... by accident."
"Don't you know what it means to become an orgy guy? It changes everything. I'd have to dress different. I'd have to act different. I'd have to grow a moustache and get all kinds of robes and lotions and I'd need a new bedspread and new curtains I'd have to get thick carpeting and weirdo lighting. I'd have to get new friends. I'd have to get orgy friends. ... Naw, I'm not ready for it.
"If only something like that could happen to me."
"Oh, shut up you couldn't do it either."
"I know."

Vanilla - poll
 

So, BRC, are you doing much of the stuff on your Non-wonderbread list? I'll agree that all that stuff is non-wonderbread. I note that you left anal off (after all this discussion, none-the-less!). I assume it is wonderbread. Also where is sex on speed on your list?

The Washington Post is so behind the FB
 

Spree: article about unhappy Trading Spaces homeowners.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn...ml?nav=hptoc_c

Vanilla - poll
 

This whole discussion, while dead-horse like, has been somewhat interesting to me. I have had sex with men from all walks of life from hair band musicians to athletes to video store clerks to students to pothead layabouts to career criminals to professors etc., but I have never really dated anyone who suggested anything in your second list. If anyone ever suggested anything verging on your second list, it was me, and it was usually met with a look of horror or shock that a sweet thing like me would suggest such a thing, followed by bad sex and a break up shortly thereafter. It makes a girl start to shut up about that kind of thing.

I think I attract a certain kind of man that thinks for whatever reason that I am not the kind of person to cross certain lines. It is probably why I married my husband - along with all the other good stuff, he did not seem to have a prejudged idea of me (not that I am in any way suggesting that we have had sex with children or animals or anything else on DS' perverted list).

P.S. I am glad you switched back avatars - I like the Lisa Marie one better (at least I think that is the actress, no?)

Vanilla - poll
 

And would the car be "public?" If so, I guess I am now non-wonderbread and all of you have become wonderbread apparently making me not the fucking prude everyone thought. Look what you people have done -- turned a sweet innocent little hockey fan into a sexual fucking deviant. :eek:

Vanilla - poll
 

Yeah, if the car's parked in your garage, it really doesn't mean much except that you want to have sex in a really uncomfortable environment. (For that matter, what furniture (other than sex-toy furniture) is not vanilla?)

And where's the sex in voyeurism? Are we talking watching your wife/hubby do it with a third-party, or are we talking about peeping in the neighbor's window? Or is it letting a third-party watch you and other? Which is really just sex in public, and should be called exhibitionism.

Also, I don't see how sex on drugs (of any type) is vanilla or not. Sex is sex; drugs are drugs. If you're taking a particular drug, the question is how hard-core of a user you are, not whether you're in to non-"mainstream" sex. Unless we're getting into a debate of the vanilla-ness of drugs. E.g., pot is vanilla, X and coke are strawberry, and the rest are chocolate.

Vanilla - poll
 

no, it's wonderbread -- see the list. non-wonderbread to DS does scare me a little too...

Vanilla - poll
 

Well, it's also a little bit tough to tell the difference between "restraints" and "light restraints" and "role playing" and "mild roll playing"

How many cuffs cross the line?

And is a sexy santa outfit mild or not?

Vanilla - poll
 

Thanks. I see cars as wonderbread but public as non-wonderbread. I suppose doing it on the interstate in a convertible during the day would fall in between -- kinda like a sandwhich with one slice of wonderbread and one slice of rye (with seeds, of course).

edited to say - one time first hubby and I got "caught" in a mall parking garage (at night, top floor, nobody around). I later became friends with a cop at the courthouse where I used to clerk and he mentioned that he was once a rent-a-cop at the mall. I laughed and told the "one time we were caught" story. The cop says "that was YOU?" and proceeds to describe first hubby's old car from the mall days. He said "we saw it on video and eventually came up to hassle you, at least we stood a bit back from the car while you finished." Cars can be public even when not convertible. Thank god I am now one hubby and many states removed from that story.

How weird is this?
 

Vanilla - poll
 

Santa can be sexy?

Thanks for spoiling EVERY SINGLE CHRISTMAS SPECIAL EVER for me from now on...

Vanilla - poll
 

I took voyeurism to mean having sex while watching other people have sex.

Clearly, wonderbread.

Even(shockingly high purity score)Odds