I might be fat but you're ugly and I can always lose weight
 

I can't figure out why I would date either one. But I'm shallow. My answer would be it depends on which I found more attractive, I guess, which would be completely subjective (obviously) and therefore not predictable. I would not date someone that I did not find attractive. If the hypo begins with the fact that the choices are viewed by society as either fat or ugly it would be up to me whether I felt any chemistry with either of them. If not, my choice is none of the above - I'll go it alone and buy lots of batteries.

I know. My answer sucks. Sorry.

I might be fat but you're ugly and I can always lose weight
 

Picture please? And where is this adult board? Can an immature 30 year old access it?

I might be fat but you're ugly and I can always lose weight
 

I have decided not to go to the adult board anymore bc I enjoy having a job. But Take A Wild Guess posted it over there. You cant miss it. Its the pic that generated a post from Sebby along the lines of "Man, look at the slab of roast beef on her!". The only more revolting post was the one where he discusses the sweaty salt lick between his wife's leg that is like greasy roast beef.

I might be fat but you're ugly and I can always lose weight
 

No need to really, now. Even the re: line's misleading: one can Extreme Makeover oneself out of ugly now just as easily as one can lipo one's colossal ass or be forced off the Doritos by having one's stomach stapled to the size of a walnut.

Of course, I find the prospect of any of the above rather gross and creepy, and would go it alone as well instead.

I might be fat but you're ugly and I can always lose weight
 

I think I'm going to have to go with ugly but this person has to have an amazing body. Once a person hits a certain level of fatness, they are ugly. That's why people say things like, she would be pretty if she wasn't fat.

I might be fat but you're ugly and I can always lose weight
 

I seriously just gagged.

I might be fat but you're ugly and I can always lose weight
 

I dont think I did it justice. somebody shoudl archive Sebby's greatest hits. do a search under 'greased" or slick or something

I might be fat but you're ugly and I can always lose weight
 

I must've totally missed the inception of the adult board. I just checked and saw it for what I think was the first time. I'll check it out tonight from home. But I will NOT do a search for slick. Ick.

I might be fat but you're ugly and I can always lose weight
 

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Hey, that sweaty salt lick between you legs is no culinary masterpiece. And it ain't much fun loosing feeling in your jaw licking a quivering handful of greased roast beef while your hips are shaking.

Be polite and sit still while a man is eating.

I might be fat but you're ugly and I can always lose weight
 

Gag. That was ill.

Label Instructions
 

Yeah. It's an email. Skip it if you got it already.

Actual label instructions on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.

On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down."

On Marks &Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness."

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."

On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."

Thurgreed(those crazy Swedes)Marshall

I might be fat but you're ugly and I can always lose weight
 

Need more info. Is that fat girl pretty? Does the ugly girl have a nice body? Help me out here.

TM

Was this the game?
 

Queen Victoria is rumored to have smoked pot to cure nausea. You could try that.

Cheap-Ass Lawyers
 

Sorry, sweetie. All of my clients have policies which forbid me from giving them gifts or anything of value. About two years ago, a client (a relatively senior in-house lawyer in a large legal department) told me how much trouble one of his colleagues got in for keeping a bottle of wine he received from outside counsel.

What I do instead of sending jars of Harry and David chutney is make sure that I invite the local clients (and spouses/kids) to sit in the firm's box at the Podunkville Stadium for sporting events and the like, and visit the out of town clients a couple of times a year and take them to incredibly expensive restaurants.

You want to get gifts next year? Tell the next outside counsel you talk to on the phone that you loved the Godiva chocolates that your law school classmate who handles matters for you in Macon sent you. Then say how much you pity those poor friends of yours who are in-house at places that have anti-gift policies. That should start the ball rolling.

But make sure that there is no such policy buried somewhere in the fine print at your company. A few of my clients have theirs listed in the "Standards of Engagement" letter that they send to me at the beginning of each matter. (The offending language is usually right after the part about how I won't charge more than 10 cents a copy and that I will give them a 10% discount off of my standard rate for the privilege of representing them.)

Was this the game?
 

Thanks. And I know who to go to for the chips.

TM