Desk Antics
 

If you think you're bored, imagine how your wife must feel.

Desk Antics
 

You are definitely more of a Monkey Scribe guy.

Desk Antics
 

my theory is you just don't know what constitutes acceptable conversation around sophisticated North city people. Good for you that you don't live up here or you'd be getting your ass kicked semi-regularly.

Desk Antics
 

Oh, yeah? You and how many of your socks?

Desk Antics
 

Some people like a good ass-kicking.

Desk Antics
 

She feels pretty good. I've been hitting that shit like a bottle of Boone's Farm on a head full of fungus...

Gotta get my licks in before she's too fat for the wheelbarrow...

Desk Antics
 

Nice.

But I thought you didn't go for the licking stuff.

Everything in Moderation
 

I prefer a spirited slapping.

Desk Antics
 

It's a sympathetic pregnancy kind of thing.

I've been crying all the time and holding the cats a lot as well.

Everything in Moderation
 

Well, who doesn't? But watch out! You never know where the spirited slapping will lead. It's the age-old story -- it starts with an innocuous (and spirited) slapping, then before you know it, you're sending your entire address book pictures of you and your most beloved corncob.

Everything in Moderation
 

I wish... I bleed easily. Borderline hemophilia... royal lineage, you understand.

I miss "Husky" so... To think they used her for popcorn...

Damned marijuana. She deserved better. Front stage in a cornucopia arrangement at least...

Everything in Moderation
 

"Corncob Mountain"?

Everything in Moderation
 

I miss fart jokes.


<sniff>

NFL Draft
 

Various NFL Draft websites are particularly rumour-ish this week.

Rumor #1: Texans trade David Carr for Mr. Puff Puff Give (and picks), draft Vince Young, thereby having UT players at the marquee positions.

Rumor #2: Len'Dale White is zooming up teams' boards. Green Bay loves him at #5!!! The Jets like him at #4?????? Holy moly.

Everything in Moderation
 

Ribbed for your pleasure. By God.