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-   -   Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a row (http://www.lawtalkers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=845)

Fugee 12-03-2009 11:44 AM
Re: Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a ro
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ABBAKiss (Post 409043)
So you're saying I should take the cheating fucker back?
If you do, make sure you've got a zero tolerance policy and a 9 iron!

It sounds like this works for Mrs. TM -- but from what he wrote I suspect it only works because he wants it to work.

ABBAKiss 12-03-2009 11:49 AM
Re: Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a ro
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThurgreedMarshall (Post 409047)
Nope. Not necessarily. I have no idea what he's like. I think you should go with what you want. If you can't trust him anymore, there is absolutely no point in getting back together with him. Plus, if it's the same guy that bought a dog when you didn't want one, moved in with you because he had nowhere else to go, got you knocked up (not that the outcome of that was a bad thing), was a recovering alcoholic and had you not drinking too, then I think you should tell him to pound sand.* But I also think you should take my advice and toss it on the pile of shit you ignore, along with all the rest of the advice you get on how to live your life.**

TM

*This may be an amalgamation of dudes or may be other people's SOs. I can't be expected to remember everything. That's fugee's job.

**Ayaaa Ayaaa Ayaaa
Nope, that's him. He's a douche. And he wants me back.

Tyrone Slothrop 12-03-2009 11:49 AM
Re: Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a ro
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cletus Miller (Post 409030)
She would walk with ~1% (max)? That's why I question it. If you told be $25mm, $50mm, sure, that might be enough to get it over with easily. But she ain't walking for $9mm or less (unless the support agreement is *huge*, or if there weren't kids) without causing him some real pain first.
It's a floor, not a ceiling.

ABBAKiss 12-03-2009 11:50 AM
Re: Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a ro
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fugee (Post 409049)
If you do, make sure you've got a zero tolerance policy and a 9 iron!

It sounds like this works for Mrs. TM -- but from what he wrote I suspect it only works because he wants it to work.
I had a zero tolerance policy before, and I used my fists and nails. Unfortunately, he is not loaded so I didn't get a settlement, though the child support hearing is in two weeks. But I make way more than he does so whatever.

Edited to add that we went to counseling and he said that he was and always had been very happy with me. His cheating had NOTHING to do with me. It had to do with him and his need to constantly feed his ego. Which means this will not change, and there is nothing I can do to improve our relationship. I suspect Tiger is the same. There is likely NOTHING wrong with Elin, aside from she is only one person and he needs to know EVERYONE wants him.

Sidd Finch 12-03-2009 11:53 AM
Re: Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a ro
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by John Phoenix (Post 409029)
I'm glad to hear that you're doing better. Not that anyone cares. My wife had Graves Disease hit after the birth of our kid. Between that and breast feeding, my wife lost the baby weight very, very quickly. She was happy about that. I was not so happy about the crazy that came with it. The medicine did wonders, and then the disease faded away over time.
Your wife ended up hot, but crazy? You must feel Tiger's pain.

Sidd Finch 12-03-2009 11:54 AM
Re: Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a ro
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by SlaveNoMore (Post 409033)
Uh, for the record, and as much as I love Barely (i) although she was in my bed once, it was while she was napping with Neighsayer - whilst we were all drinking in the other room, and (ii) johnson jokes? About me? Dude, I don't even post anymore.
And we miss you. Though it's nice to see you still Wonk.

Sparklehorse 12-03-2009 11:55 AM
Re: Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a ro
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ABBAKiss (Post 409052)
I had a zero tolerance policy before, and I used my fists and nails. Unfortunately, he is not loaded so I didn't get a settlement, though the child support hearing is in two weeks. But I make way more than he does so whatever.

Edited to add that we went to counseling and he said that he was and always had been very happy with me. His cheating had NOTHING to do with me. It had to do with him and his need to constantly feed his ego. Which means this will not change, and there is nothing I can do to improve our relationship. I suspect Tiger is the same. There is likely NOTHING wrong with Elin, aside from she is only one person and he needs to know EVERYONE wants him.
What benefit would there be to taking him back? Was the sex so mind-blowing that it obliterates all other considerations?

notcasesensitive 12-03-2009 11:56 AM
Re: Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a ro
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ABBAKiss (Post 409050)
Nope, that's him. He's a douche. And he wants me back.
With incomplete information, but more than most on the board have, I say no fucking way. Sure, I don't know what happened, but I did meet him. No fucking way. No. Fucking. Way.





(NO FUCKING WAY.)



No Fucking Way.

Or, uh, do whatever you think is best.

ABBAKiss 12-03-2009 11:57 AM
Re: Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a ro
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sparklehorse (Post 409055)
What benefit would there be to taking him back? Was the sex so mind-blowing that it obliterates all other considerations?
We have a 14 month old daughter.

ABBAKiss 12-03-2009 11:58 AM
Re: Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a ro
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by notcasesensitive (Post 409057)
With incomplete information, but more than most on the board have, I say no fucking way. Sure, I don't know what happened, but I did meet him. No fucking way. No. Fucking. Way.





(NO FUCKING WAY.)



No Fucking Way.

Or, uh, do whatever you think is best.
Yeah, you are absolutely right, Pretty Lady.

dtb 12-03-2009 12:00 PM
Re: Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a ro
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ABBAKiss (Post 409043)
So you're saying I should take the cheating fucker back?
NOOOOO!!!

Well, obviously, it's up to you, but the take-away I would read from TM's message is you find someone who has no desire to cheat on you.

Once that trust is gone, for me anyway, the spell is broken. ymmv

Pretty Little Flower 12-03-2009 12:06 PM
Re: Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a ro
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by notcasesensitive (Post 409057)
No Fucking Way.
I'm glad you finally figured out how to do that.

Flinty_McFlint 12-03-2009 12:18 PM
Re: Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a ro
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by notcasesensitive (Post 409057)
With incomplete information, but more than most on the board have, I say no fucking way. Sure, I don't know what happened, but I did meet him. No fucking way. No. Fucking. Way.





(NO FUCKING WAY.)



No Fucking Way.

Or, uh, do whatever you think is best.
2. Though I would have preferred to see you use Gill Sans Light or even Cheltenham Old Style No 2 (get it?). Always be designing.

evenodds 12-03-2009 12:18 PM
Re: Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a ro
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ABBAKiss (Post 409058)
We have a 14 month old daughter.
This is the thing. People can absolutely change, if they want to. They can break patterns and find new ways of dealing with things. Therapists help, acknowledgment of problems and patterns helps. There is a lot of work he can do to be a better person and a better partner.

The difficulty becomes "do you reconcile with him when he's going through this process?" Do you enable him to undergo regular therapy alone or with you? Will you be able to forgive him? What will your rules be?

I know other Thurgreeds who went from inveterate playboys to solid family men. They made a conscious choice to change and put the work in.

He can change. He has to want to and work at it. Can you be a part of his process or are you better reconsidering after a year and protecting you and your child in the meantime?

greatwhitenorthchick 12-03-2009 12:34 PM
Re: Welcome back E/O, leagl and Fringey: no one say the name "Penske" 3 times in a ro
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Adder (Post 409041)
Strange how this is the case for most undesirable behaviors. Too bad the deciding is so hard.
2. I don't think it is strange though. I think that's just the way it is. Undesirable behavior meets a need for the most part -- so it's very hard to give up unless that need can be otherwise met.


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