Never spit on a cop
 

Especially in Oklahoma.

OKLAHOMA CITY, July 2 — An Oklahoma man arrested on suspicion of beating his wife faced year in prison and a fine. But when he spit in an arresting officer’s face, he got a life sentence instead, officials said on Wednesday.

they call it wife beating there, spousal abuse everywhere else

Last Comic Standing
 

Soulcracker's last album, the one with the Bee on it, is actually quite good, and I listen to it once a month or so. Sutton has a good voice. Sadly, 'Cracker broke up shortly after the show ended. I saw Ramsey and AP working on the crew at Coachella. I see Flickerstick's album in record stores every so often, but I've never been tempted to buy it. Josh Dodes was a classmate of mine in college, and saw him perform once there. I think they're probably the most successful of the groups, in their own kinda grass roots way.

I think I've seen enough to make predictions for Last Comic Standing.

Ralphie: 1-1
Tess: 2-1
Dave: 5-2
Rich: 3-1
Cory: 9-2
Rob: 6-1
Dat: 6-1
Geoff: 10-1

Here's my guess. Dat gets voted next week. He chooses to challenge Geoff, and beats him despite the disadvantage of having to go first. Just a guess.

Pack your bags!
 

I saw two absolutely brilliant South Park episodes last week. The Civil War Re-enactment episode, and the "Scott Tenerman Must Die"/Cartman buys the pubes episode. Until recently I'd only watched SP intermittently since the first season, but damn Matt & Trey have been doing a good job. So any SP fans here? What are your top 5 SP episodes?

Pack your bags!
 

Among my top 5 are:

* the lesbian substitute teacher, when all the boys decide to become lesbians
* the sex education class, when mr. garrison teaches kindergartners about the "dirty sanchez" among others
* towlie
* big gay al's animal rescue

Do We Know This NYer?
 

Euuuk. Very icky. What is it with guys and their bodily fluids?

Pack your bags!
 

Towelie - for sure.
Big Gay Al's big gay boat ride
Mr. Hankie
underwear gnomes ( hysterical )
the one where cartman turns into a vietnamese prostitute.

Pack your bags!
 

*underwear gnomes
*cartman gets an anal probe
*the first respect my authoritae episode with the big wheel police-cartman
*first Timmy episode (with garage band and benefit)

Actually I think they are all good. The movie was my favorite comedy movie of all time. The plot. The character development. The Music Numbers!

(seriously, I really did think the movie was well done)

Pack your bags!
 

I had heard of southpark but not watched it some years ago when a friend told me I would appreciate it so I should watch it. The very first episode I ever saw was the big gay al episode. If it were actually possible to fall on the floor laughing, I would have. I never have seen the complete lesbian substitute one but I did see them licking carpets and was wondering what the hell was going on, until someone in the episode explained they wanted to be lesbians.

I can't really list 5 favorite episodes, I haven't watched it in a while, but for the most part, whenever I do, I find it very funny. The movie was hilarious.

Pack your bags!
 

The movie was excellent. What was the name of the operation? We tried to think of it the other day and couldn't.

Did you see the Timmy episode with the Crips and the Bloods? Classic.

Pack your bags!
 

Operation Human Shield - to which all the blacks were assigned. Followed by Operation get behind the darkies, I believe.

Edited to add that I do not make a habit of memorizing these things - I just watched the movie recently and that stuck in my head.

Pack your bags!
 

A propos of GWNK, Canada Day, Vancouver 2010, and the rain we're getting in DC -- thanks Bill -- I saw a woman carrying one of these today:

http://www.cartoonnetwork.com/shop/t...B00002B.02.jpg

Pack your bags!
 

Good pick str8, I've always enjoyed SP.


That Scott Tenerman episode was one of the sickest episodes I've ever seen. Absolutely hilarious.

[Cartman] "Yes! Yesss!! Oh, let me taste your tears, Scott! [starts licking Scott's tears off his face] Mm, your tears are so yummy and sweet. Oh, the tears of unfathomable sadness!"

I also liked Cripple Fight, Butters' Very Own Episode, Chicken Pox and Hooked on Monkey Phonics (because, well, it had a monkey that played drums and masturbated).

another reality tv twist
 

reality blurred -

Four Big Brother 4 cast members will be surprised to learn that their exes are joining the cast too. The cast will be told of the twist on the first day, but there's no word when the exes will be brought in. "[N]one of the houseguests knew their former mates were screened as possible...participants," Entertainment Weekly reports. And producer Arnold Shapiro says, ''It will be a really unpredictable situation. Maybe they'll be happy to see the ex who broke up with them, or maybe it's someone they are dreading to see. It's going to be the most turbulent, unpredictable time -- not only at the end of the first show but in the days and weeks to follow." The cast moves in on Friday but the show won't begin until a week from today, Digital Spy reports, which would likely mean that the cast is currently sequestered, or else they'd be learning about the twist now.

me -

How bad would it suck to get into a house where you are sequestered like that only to learn that you are stuck there with an ex who hates you? Maybe some of these folks will be begging to be voted out...

another reality tv twist
 

That wouldn't be as bad as being sequestered with an ex that you have NO interest in, who desperately wants you back. At least if you both hate each other, you can manage to stay away and say mean things behind each others' back - that's fun.

The other way, you're stuck in mindless, endless conversations with a person you now hate who just wants to know why you don't want them/love them anymore. Ewww. That would REALLY suck.:smash:

Pack your bags!
 

Oh, god, THAT was the Scott Tenerman episode - that was friggin' hilairous.

I personally loved the Butters and the Token episodes of the recent ones. The Santa/Blackhawk down episode almost made me pee when Santa started saying "ya know, I think we should remember someone very special today - his name was Jesus, and he died for me..." They did that sleigh-crash scene almost shot for shot from the movie - and pretty well, too.

I can really only speak to the recent ones, since, I've discovered, my favorite South Park episode is whatever one I've seen most recently.

And the "eat with your ass and shit out your mouth" one? And the "shit-meter" one where it kept track of how many times someone said "shit"? I ADORED the shit-meter one. And the priest who goes to the Vatican to ask them to stop molesting boys and discover that the heads of the Church actually worship a giant spider from outer space?

And, of course, Starvin' Marvin.

another reality tv twist
 

Not as bad as being stuck in that same house when one of your roommates starts hooking up with said ex.

another reality tv twist
 

You mean you're not just terrific friends with all of your exes and wouldn't invite every last one of them to your own wedding some day?

Pack your bags!
 

And, for everyone's personal collections ...

http://shop.comedycentral.com/family...entPage=family

I WANT the vibrating Tweek doll.

Pack your bags!
 

Wow, that is not at all what I thought you meant by "vibrating" Tweek doll.

another reality tv twist
 

Especially if said ex is of the hottest-sex-ever* variety.

*Until you met your current sweetie, of course.

I wonder what the prospective housemates revealed about their past relationships and how the casting directors took those facts into account. I would seek a variety, e.g., the aforementioned hottest sex ex, the one that got away ex, the everything was great but there was no chemistry ex, the cheating ex, etc.

another reality tv twist
 

Well, then you have no choice but to get back together immediately.

Of course, what happens on Big Brother stays on Big Brother.:rolleyes:

Note to Fox: This would make a great plot twist for Temptation Island. Bring back the hot-sex-ex for each couple and see what happens.

another reality tv twist
 

How diabolical! For even if no cheating occurs, you know there'll be some lying going on.

another reality tv twist
 

It's brilliant. There is nothing quite like the Ex-Factor to shake things up.

Looks like I will be adding big brother to our list of shows.

another reality tv twist
 

Big Brother is great viewing. I didn't watch the first season (or the second?), but I thoroughly enjoyed last season's "Roddy is the devil!!!" machinations, which met with well-deserved defeat. It was totally addictive.

And I'm not (too) embarrassed to admit it.

another reality tv twist
 

Did I go to college with you?

another reality tv twist
 

Possibly. But I wasn't that ex.

another reality tv twist
 

I wasn't any of those people, and I think actually the dating people were housemates, then broke up, then the guy started having sleepovers with his new girlfriend in the house he was still sharing with his old girlfriend.

It was a little awkward.

another reality tv twist
 

Tweet!

Foul on the Play!

Here's the Call ... "Using 'Plot' and 'Temptation Island' in the same sentence"

How about that, Jim Nantz, the referee is assessing a penalty viewing of six hours of 'Mr. Personality' with NO bathroom breaks!

Let's get back to the action .... :D

Dead Like Me
 

Did anybody watch this, or is Showtime not FB cool?

I'd have to say I was a little disappointed after all the critical acclaim I'd heard. Mandy Patinkin is good, and I admit it's a little funny to see Jasmine Guy swear, but overall it was a little slow as pilots go.

It's kind of funny that Callum Blue was also in "Shades" on the BBC, which was also about dead people interacting with the living while looking like other people. Talk about typecasting.

Mr. Winkle
 

Famous dog will be on Sex and the City sometime this year. Since I have yet to see an episode, I don't know if he's been on yet. here he is, Mr. Winkle

Mr. Winkle
 

I fear that a guest appearance by Mr. Winkle will be used by future generations to pinpoint when the series jumped the shark. After all, look what Nancy Reagan did to "Diff'rent Strokes." But I'd say the series really jumped the shark when SJP slept with that guy. You know, what's-his-name.

Threads
 

This is true. Plus, I have a New Pornographers air guitar story.

The day I left SF to go back to LA, they played a second show at Bimbo's. Midway through the show, they made some joke about Canadian bands... and Rush came up in conversation. Somehow, and I heard this secondhand, so I don't know exactly, this prompted the band to ask the crowd for a volunteer air guitarist. Some scrawny, underaged looking kid wearing one of those rising sun t-shirts that looked really cool when Eddie Van Halen wore them on the Diver Down tour got up on stage and started doing the whole windmill shtick to the next song. The crowd goes wild. The band decides an air bassist is needed. The scrawny kid's friend, a Jack Black look-alike, gets up on stage and outperforms the scrawny kid in air guitar glory. The drummer decides that he wants and air drummer. A girl gets on stage. After each song, another fan gets to be the air-whatever for another band member. (Kinda like that old Talking Heads video). Anyway, the air band stays with the regular band through the rest of the concert and leaves the stage with the band. They are overheard turning down a record deal in the lobby after the show.

On a further music note, Welcome Interstate Managers from Fountains of Wayne is on sale at Tower for $9.99. Now none of you have an excuse. Buy the damn CD and enjoy it over the Fourth of July weekend.

South Park is, as they used to say in the East Bay, hella funny. The movie was dangerously funny. Dangerous as in, I'm humming the melody to "Uncle Fucka" at work dangerous. Recently I liked the J.Lo episode- where Cartman painted lips on his hand, declared her to be Jennifer Lopez, recorded a hit album, and stole Ben Affleck from J.Lo.

Plus, that hippo was hilarious.

Can it be?!?
 

Just checking to see if the board is still functional -- can hardly believe that no one has posted anything in seven hours!!!

:eek:

Can it be?!?
 

We all blew our fingers off with pre-4th fire crackers. I'm typing this with my nose.

Google makes a funny
 

Go to www.google.com and type in "weapons of mass destruction" without the quotation marks. Then click on "I'm Feeling Lucky" and read the error message.

Google makes a funny
 

That's very good. If it's not outable, can you tell me how on earth you found out about that?

sf

Google makes a funny
 

MSNBC.com told me.

Drink Check
 

I am typing this with a mild hangover.

Here's my question of the morning:

Do you have a regular drink you order, or do you frequently change your drink of choice?

I frequently change my drink.

When I am not imbibing pisco sours, I drink any of the following at a bar:

champagne (not with a straw, thank you very much)
mexican martini (or margarita in a pinch)
vodka tonic
assorted rum or vodka based cocktails

For Love or Money crossed with AI
 

Okay, so when they come up with a hybrid game, I think Tommy Mottola should be the bachelor/selector. A featurette this morning on Thalia, the new Shakira/Xina/etc., revealed (to me) that she's married to him. What is this, like the fourth singing protege he's married or dated? If the hits stop coming, is that when the love ends?

Is Mariah Carey online to answer this for me?

For Love or Money crossed with AI
 

Mariah said she divorced him because she felt like "she was in a gilded cage" and he just wanted them to stay at home all the time. Upshot: she's young and lively; he's old and lame; he was afraid she'd figure that out so he wouldn't let her go out.

I assume Thalia will get tired of being daddy's little girl sometime and decide to sneak out the window to go play with other kids, too.