Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

The Mr. and I exchanged numbers. He had about twice as many as I did, which, based on random polling of friends who have also coughed up the number, seems to be about what (men, anyway) wanted to hear. Unless the men are total sluts, I guess.

But in general, I agree one shouldn't ask unless it is required for the testing questionaire. Significant past relationships merit mention, if only so one isn't taken by surprise when you run into the person, but sheer numbers of casual bangs? Definitely not.

I got majorly squicked out by a guy I dated who at the age of 19 revealed a past littered with over 50 conquests (he wasn't too sure about the numbers). I responded "um, you would make 4." I really didn't want to know. Not least 'cause, when a guy is 19, he should have been focusing on his performance technique (not just his powers of persuasion), which requires feedback from repeat players over time, so that really just represents a lot of bad sex and a general waste of time and effort.

Worth Noting
 

Sam Watterson ruined L&O for me. Of course, anyone who followed in Ben Stone's footsteps was doomed from the start. God I loved his arrogance.

Actual Fashion Question
 

At my firm, those who get nabbed typically are called by the HR people. As long as we are doing business casual, most non-flip flop sandals are considered ok. I think we'll be going back to business attire soon though. Then it will be back to closed-toe shoes I'm sure. That really sucks in Dallas.

I can't believe I am both thinking this and admitting this, but I saw Billy Bob on Inside the Actors Stuido, and for the frst time ever, I could see his appeal. I was shocked myself.

And I hear he is hung.

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

As a guy, at what number do you start lying towards less conquests? If it's 50, do you say 15?

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

Am I the only person here who has absolutelyu no idea what her number is? Who keeps track of these things? Seems kinda OCD.

COuld be fifteen, could be fifty, I have no clue.

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

Not right at the start, I am not sure I think it is an appropriate question, except as someone noted, along the lines of I'm kind of inexperienced and have never done X before. But I am not sure that requires you to tell how many. I think it does come up sooner or later, and I'd rather it be truthful.

I have no problem with telling the amount I've been with but it seems to surprise people and then they seem to get scared they'll hurt me or something. (Obviously this means I am on the less experienced side.) They are also afraid to tell me they've been with 30 people or however many, since they fear I'll judge them.

I don't care if someone has been with 30 people, I care if someone believes they have (in their 30s) seriously dated 30 people. Cause damn, you can't commit if you think you seriously dated 30 people in approximately 10-15 years. That is more likely to make me run screaming for the hills than the fact you had sex with a lot of people. Who cares. Hopefully that just means you are better in bed.

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

Yeah, in figuring it out this morning, I realized I am slightly fuzzy on the old college days. I can pinpoint the number with a 2-3 margin of error. I could tell you first names for all but one (my one and only true two night stand -- hook-up, followed by "date" the next night). Many of the last names are long gone.

I'm pretty sure that my number is higher than the SO's. I'm also pretty sure that he has generally gathered that. We just feel no need to discuss specifics.

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

I don't understand the guy-wanting-number-about-twice-as-high. If they really only consider a female "OK" if she has 1/2 the number of partners he has, then probably at least 1/2 the women he's been with are icky. And what do the women who have been with all these guys do?

I vote, get him to tell first and then use the real number (if it's half or less) or about half (if the real number is more than half). Any jackass who's going to be offended that I have approaching the number of sexual partners he has had deserves to be lied to.

(Actually, I'd probably tell the real number and if he can't deal, it wasn't going to work out anyway.)

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

That would depend on whatever lie the woman is intending to tell you. For example, if she plans to tell you she's been with 10, then 15 would be about right.

I think I find even Jack Klugman a little less disturbing.

He just seems a little too....Deliverance.

I have heard that too. The other person who is/was surprisingly hung (from what I've heard, not first hand experience) is Uncle Milty. He apparently whipped it out for one of the SNL writers b/c it had taken on mythological proportions. The writer was standing in the dressing room with Milton Berle with his (as he called it ) snake pulled out when Gilda Radner walked in...

(still enjoying the SNL book)

[Edited to fix typo]

How to make Monday better
 

Hit me baby one more time...your chance to punch Brittney Spears. punch Brittney Spears


And if you're in the mood - a very disturbing video about beavers and brocolli.


Early warning - either the site is running very slow today, or my server/anti-virus software is running like mud.we like beavers more than brocolli

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

Once you're past a certain point, especially by comparison to the other person, does it really matter? If your potential is at 10, is there a difference between 25 and 100?

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

No, no, no. I understand the concept of matching your lie to someone else's lie, but the best response is, "Sweetheart, in my mind it's just you. It's always been just you. You're the only one I've ever been with because you're the only one I have ever been able to give my heart to." Of course the person won't buy it, but they'll give you points for trying.

And PP: I don't know what my number is either, although I have a general idea. It is not something I would ever tell someone I wanted to not think about it every time we deposed each other. I tried to count it up a few years ago but then it got all confusing with what counts and what doesn't and with not recalling names, evenings, etc. Also, I'm not sure what's worse--knowing that your current SO has only been with one person but loved (or still loves, in some way shape or form) that person, or knowing that your SO was (is?) a slut who did not have emotional attachments pre-you.

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

Guess that depends on the potential. Personally I think if the person goes crazy (or if he or she feels you have been with too many or too few people to be comfortable) then it is just as well to find out before it goes too far. Move on to someone else then.

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

I think that the standard rule is Don't Ask/Don't Tell -- and this applies both to issues of quantity (numbers of partners) and quality (non-traditional positions, locales, props, etc.).

I mean, does one really want to know that The Love Of One's Life had 64 partners and used to play Partner and Associate ("I said to use Times Roman font for the draft prospectus! Now, drop your pants" WHACK "Owwww! I'm sorry, Ms. Rainmaker") with his ex-girlfriend?

Actual Fashion Question
 

Concur. Isn't it incredible that this needs to be spelled out?!? The last summer I was at a firm, it was abuzz with the sartorial missteps of one particular female summer associate. On more than one occasion, there was bare stomach involved and there was much hand-wringing over who was going to tell her that she was working as a summer associate, not a lifeguard. I can't remember how it was resolved, but I think someone did end up "speaking" with her (can't remember if it was a female partner, or her "summer buddy" -- also a female.)


Concur.

Must dissent. I have seen shoes (particularly this season) that have ankle straps and they are quite fetching and not at all suggestive of bondage (NTTAWWT, of course). Of course, it's kind of like pornography -- in that I know it [inappropriate footwear] when I see it -- but I cannot agree that "ankle strap" is an automatic deal killer.

Partial dissent on the flip-flop thing. Mules (which sometimes make a flip-flop sound, especially when stepping down a flight of stairs) can be a very professional summer look, and the occasional slapping sound should not disqualify an otherwise tasteful shoe from one's summer shoe wardrobe. In fact, I'm wearing a pair today, and must say, I look smashing, she said modestly. Then again, I'm not a summer associate, but still...

If I had to come up with a golden rule for summer associate wardrobe selection, it would have to be, "If you're questioning whether it's appropriate, it probably isn't." (This, of course, is useless for that apparently broad spectrum of [mostly] gals who seem to have no clue as to what is and is not appropriate, but then again, adages are a real bear to impart for that very reason -- one size never really fits all.)

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

I think most people would say there is a huge difference between 25 and 100, just in terms of the self-respect/respect for others factor. (I mean, unless you are over a 100 yourself, you can't have had any sort of actual relationship with any one of the 100 partners, can you?) Unless you are a gay man, of course, and then all bets are off.

FWIW - I hate the numbers game, and I have absolutely no idea what mine is (The college years were a slutty prelude to my current staid serial monagamy). Therefore, when asked, my number is always 9. Not so few that the other person thinks you are too new at the game, and not likely to be significantly higher or lower than the person asking the question.

I believe he refers to it as "The Boy" and, when asked about it, said, "oh you haven't seen The Boy?" and whipped it out.

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

This number thing is so stupid.

I'm not even sure why someone would care how many people you have slept with, so long as you're not going to give them something. Do you need the number because you are going to say - oh no, this girl has slept with 126* men, therefore she (i) has real self-esteem problems and probably really high-maintenance, (ii) has AIDS or something like that** (iii) may know more than I do about the art of love, (iv) may cheat on me - and therefore she's history. Or are you looking to say (v) woo hoo, I got me a nympho!!

Reason number (v) is the only acceptable reason for asking for someone's numbers.



*number pulled randomly out of hat
** If this is the answer you want, just ask the question more directly - i.e. do you have AIDS or something similar?

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

I have a general idea, but I haven't really stopped to count.

From conversations I have had with female friends, most of us lie anyway. I think the general rule has been "it doesn't count if he didn't buy you dinner."

Austin(only intercourse counts)tatious

Weekend stuff
 

Here's an old joke for bilmore who's still not talking to me.

A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a transcontinental train. After the initial embarrassment and uneasiness, they both go to sleep.

The man in the upper berth, and the woman in the lower berth. In the middle of the night the man leans over, wakes the woman and says, "I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly reach over and get me another blanket?

The woman leans out and, with a glint in her eye says, "I have a better idea, just for tonight let's pretend that we are married." The man happily says, "OK. AWESOME!"

The woman says "GOOD..... Get your own fucking blanket."

Thurgreed(oh, bilmore. i miss you. where has the love gone?)Marshall

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

Christ. Insert comment about Bush made (and retracted) by Dixie Chick.

Actual Fashion Question
 

Let me add to your most excellent list:

Dudes who wear shirts that don't fit properly, so there is "gapping" of the buttons, and, if that's not bad enough, no undershirt underneath -- eeew! Like what I want to see is some dude's pasty flabby gut in the flesh -- nast-o-rama.


(Seeing as I am without flaw and above reproach, I'm sure you will all agree that I am categorically qualified to point out the icky things others do...)

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

Glad to see you have a sense of humor!

Austin(I am guessing you're from the metroplex . . . :rolleyes: )tatious

Sock it up your Arse
 

i could respond to your allegations, but instead, i think i will just let the fact that you are so clueless that you think that debtslave is a man speak for itself as a representation of the accuracy of your posts

mnd

Criminal Jewelry
 

This has got to be the most moronic fucking thing I've ever heard of:

http://www.boston.com/dailyglobe2/19...acelets+.shtml

(spree: bracelets confiscated as dangerous weapons)

P(take my studded leather belt, take your chances)J

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

Good thing too.

Thurgreed(poor bastard)Marshall

"you could put out an eye with one of those things.''

If it would reach that high, how could you help but to be impressed?

Worth Noting
 

Glad I didn't see it, as I love the slutty Catholic school girl outfit.

And I agree on the movie rape thing. I forget which movie it was, "Casualties of War" or "Platoon," but I could never watch the rape scene. Always had to switch it off or stop it and completely fast forward. That said, I did watch the Jodie Foster movie where she gets raped on the pinball machine in the bar. That was bad, but I watched it. I wonder what the difference was.

TM

Weekend stuff
 

Think of it as my expression of concern for your blood pressure.

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

I heard somewhere that the formula is more like: double whatever she tells you and add two.

TM

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

Still jealous, eh?

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

This is another thing that makes a guy sound impotent.

Worth Noting
 

Disturbing violent things are much easier to watch with no sound or on fast forward (which doesn't have sound either). I never saw the Jodie Foster movie where she gets raped on the pinball machine in the bar. Or if I did, I have deliberately forgotten that.

Now I am depressed about all the really really bad people in the world doing really really bad things to other people.

Worth Noting
 

The Melfi rape scene in the Sopranos probably turned me off of that show. I didn't make the association at the time, but now that I think about it, it was soon thereafter (maybe two or three episodes) that I stopped watching. I think the quickness of it really got to me.

Criminal Jewelry
 

Damn they better not go into an underground leather club. They'd have to arrest everyone.

Weekend stuff -- the Number
 

I explained to my wife, shortly after we met, that I was, of course, virginal and innocent and untouched, and that I was saving myself for a meaningful experience with a woman whom I could love and respect.

(She laughed and laughed, but, damn!, it worked on her, too.)