agressive panhandling
 

Yes - so long as it's not a judge, in which case, I could not guarantee your safety. My cat brings copperheads to me for breakfast. They don't bother either of us. However, the cottonmouths are much more ornery and I stay out of their way unless I have a shovel in hand.

People are suprisingly friendly here (and the wildlife has every reason not to be). I know very few people that have actually been shot and those that did were victims of darwinism.

Come visit, the weather is lovely this time of year!

-T(I should work for the tourism board)L

Beggars Don't Sock
 

Some classics from the Big City Streets:

"You don't have to be a Rockafella... to help a fella..."

"What's the greatest nation in the world? DO[UGH]-nation!"

And then there's the guy with no legs on a little scooter who propels himself through the subway cars with the flat part of his knuckles on the floor. He uses the simple line, "Help." That dude's can is always STUFFED with bills!

Ice picks, anyone?
 

A propos of that, (the recently divorced) Sharon Stone will be on The Practice this Fall.

Good News!
 

First I learn that my consumption of red wine will keep me from having a heart attack. Now it seems that masturbation will keep me free of prostate cancer.
http://www.reuters.com/newsArticle.j...toryID=3102498

Now if you'll excuse me, I have a date with a good pinot and the latest Vivid dvd...

agressive panhandling
 

Great story. I can name half a dozen times where a street person followed and harrassed someone who refused to acknowledge their existence. Some psychos are looking for attention. Some psychos can't stand being ignored.

I guess, in certain cases it just comes down to a matter of how you treat people.

TM

Good News!
 

Take it to the Fitness Board.

agressive panhandling
 

Typically, permits are the key in almost all states - the level of gun-carryingness is determined by the threshold you have to meet to get a permit. (In my state, the new test is "are you breathing?") Judges are usually just automatically granted one, all over the country, no matter the threshold. Here in MN, in two of our biggest counties, the judges get a permit app when they go to baby judges' school, and they usually sign up.

But the smart ones leave them outside the courtroom.

agressive panhandling
 

Cecil Adams did a Straight Dope column on him a few years ago as a follow-up to a 1987 column before his telegenic downward spiral.

Ice picks, anyone?
 

Ah geez, not only do they fire the only good looking guy on the show, now they hire a skank? Excuse me, another skank?

She's got to play the 1st year (straight from Harvard) blonde's mother. I'll bet.

Good News!
 

While on the subject of porno noir, you'll be happy to know that a check of my e-mail reveals that "The Fashionistas" is still holding at #9 on the Adult DVD Empire Top Ten Bestseller List...

agressive panhandling
 

Okay, I think this one is a bit much. I see homeless people with animals all the time. The animals always look 10 times healthier than the owner, they are never leashed and sit quietly while the homeless person is begging. In fact, I've never seen a homeless person eating a meal that they weren't sharing with their pet. And I imagine that for people who have absolutely nothing, it's nice to have a faithful friend. Plus, I will bet you that the dog sitting next to the bum on 23rd street is happier spending his whole day with someone who cares for them than the dog left in the apartment of the associate who sees it roughly 2 hours every other day.

Being outside in the cold sucks, but that sucks for everyone on the street. Adults, children, dogs and cats.

TM

Ice picks, anyone?
 

If so, it will be her long lost, lesbian, ice pick wielding mother. NTTAWWT.

Although I don't think David Kelley will go ER on us. I'm guessing either some hot new Ass't DA or cunning criminal. Although I suppose the latter limits the number of appearances.

Good News!
 

Too many fat bashers there.

Good News!
 

A euphamism for obese masturbation?

agressive panhandling
 

Where do you live that most of the homeless don't have a drug and alcohol problem? These poor animals are emaciated most of them are flea ridden. As well as the owner.

And you're right - dogs are social animals. It would also be cruel to keep a dog locked up all day waiting for you to come home. That's the ONLY reason I have held off getting a new puppy that I so desperately want.

Hunting for Bambi
 

Saw this on Leno last night.
Hunting for Bambi

July 16 — A paintball manufacturer and advocates for women are expressing outrage that a Las Vegas company claims to be charging men up to $10,000 to use the non-lethal but dangerous weapons to shoot naked women racing through the sagebrush. But a creator of the “Hunting for Bambi” game on Wednesday defended the enterprise as good, clean fun for “guys who thought they had done everything.”

Gee, at least there's safety...
“At first we just told our hunters ‘Don’t shoot them in the head,’” he said. “Now the hunters are prohibited from raising the gun barrel above the waist level and if he does, it’s game over and there are no refunds.”

Hunting for Bambi
 

I am shocked. This is completely outrageous and exploitational. Men shouldn't be charged more than $500 to shoot a naked showgirl in the ass with a paintball gun.

How much do they charge women for the same activity?

aggressive panhandling
 

I live in New York where the homeless with severe drug and alcohol problems aren't the ones with the dogs and cats.

I'm not saying that it doesn't happen, but it's no exaggeration to say that almost all of the homeless pet owners I've run into treat their animals better than they treat themselves.

Thurgreed(how the hell do you know that most of them are flea ridden?)Marshall

Hunting for Bambi
 

You mean for women to shoot naked men in the ass or for women to shoot naked showgirls in the ass. Because I'm no expert, but I'm thinking that one would garner more money than the other.

How about this for a money making scheme for LawTalkers - shooting naked ex's in the ass with a paintball gun. Now I know that would create a lot of interest and you could charge a fortune!

Hunting for Bambi
 

Couldn't be more of a pain in the ass than my current job.

Trash talkin Lance
 

NARBONNE, France, July 16 — They were hoping to steal Lance Armstrong’s show — but halfway through the Tour de France, they are no longer on the bill. Italians Gilberto Simoni and Stefano Garzelli, Colombian Santiago Botero and Spaniard Aitor Gonzalez will have to wait another year to be in the Tour limelight.
TO MAKE MATTERS worse, they even got a stinging rebuke from the record-chasing American.
“Now Gilberto Simoni knows that the Giro is not the Tour de France,” Armstrong, the four-times champion, said about this year’s Giro winner.
“Now Aitor Gonzalez knows that the Vuelta is not the Tour de France,” he added of the Tour of Spain champion.
“Thay both may be a leading factor in this race. But not this year,” the American insisted, without mercy.
Impressive in the Giro mountains, Saeco team leader Simoni had looked an intriguing challenger for Armstrong before the Tour began on July 5, even claiming that there were no real climbers in the Tour start list. “To say things like Simoni said was an insult to Tour riders and an insult to the Tour,” Armstrong said.
Garzelli, second in the Giro which he won in 2000, pulled out with acute bronchitis before stage 10. But he had also lost far too much ground to be a threat.

Hunting for Bambi
 

You left out the best part from Leno:

"Are there so many hookers in Vegas now that they have to shoot them and thin the herd?"

In other not-so-good news, it appears some old fuck killed tens of people and hurt countless more as he plowed his car into a farmer's market in Santa Monica. Story breaking as I write.

not7yS

Trash talkin Lance
 

The talkers never win. And, continuing the TdF discussion, Allessandro Pettachi truly seems to be the heir to Super Mario. The only thing missing were the zebra-stripped shorts.

agressive panhandling
 

Um. Yeah. Makes me want to run right down. The some people just need killin' rationalization sells every time.

I always thought it was interesting that Texas thought enough ahead in their concealed weapons law to ban guns from bars; it was kind of strange when all the posters started popping up in drinking establishments reminding people that guns and people under 21 were not allowed. Guns and alcohol are a bad combination.

A fact that Tennessee still has not cottoned on to apparently, as a trip through the state on I40 seems to be an endless stream of billboards for road-side superstores offering deep discounts on your choice of guns, booze, cigarettes and/or fireworks. A yet Texas always get the crazy rap.

aggressive panhandling
 

Not quite - I know two idiots that shot themselves by accident. And another that shot his buddy when they were out hunting shitfaced (further supporting your "guns + alcohol = bad" theory). They all survived; one is now short a functioning right arm, however.

Oh, and I almost forgot - my ex-boss shot himself in the ass by accident. I am now actually laughing at the thought.

We don't need to ban concealed carry guns from bars when we allow open containers in cars, of course. Frankly, we don't really need guns at all when we can just purposefully run people over in our cars, open container optional.

-TL

agressive panhandling
 

[DUCK-HERE COMES THE LIGHTNING] I agree with TM on this part of the issue.

Generally I'm no fan of people bugging me for my hardearned cash (and that lack of fandom starts with the Democrats, runs down to the IRS and ends with the homeless and telemarketers, with the members of the democratic party who are homeless telemarketers for the IRS being the bottom of the barrel), and I either ignore them, as that pisses them off the most or tell them to fuck off. Bah humbug indeed.

Generally.

But, I have a soft spot for pets, and I will usually give the homeless people with pets some cashish. And from what I can see they are very caring with their pets. There is one dude in particular who I see with his dog once or twice a week, to whom I always give money. Cash money. American.

And I don't think his dogs have fleas.

So the lesson is, if you are homeless and want a free lunch from Penske, get a pet. Although if I smell heroin on you, all bets are off, I hate the homeless heroin addicts who litter the street here more than I hate the IRS. But slightly less so than my hatred for Hillary.

That's all.

Carry on.

aggressive panhandling
 

There you go. The fact that Peske agrees should be reason enough for you TM.

Edited to add that I don't believe for a second that you give money to anyone for anything other than Carl the Crank dealer on Main Street.

agressive panhandling
 

Norm McDonald would disagree with you. Have you ever seen his bit where he says he feels sorry for the dogs who hang with the homeless? Something like, "Did you ever see a homeless person with a dog? The dog's probably thinking, "Hey, I don't need this guy. I can do this by myself.'"

Trash talkin Lance
 

Hey, I was a trash talker...what are you trying to say?!?

aggressive panhandling
 

The Displaced Dog hates all other dogs, and he used to patrol the perimeter of the grounds of the Displaced Manse to ensure that we weren't invaded by interlopers. We used to live on a fairly major thoroughfare for homeless people. Because of all the homeless dogs that would accompany their masters, the Displaced Dog developed a Pavlovian barking frenzy to the sound of shopping carts, and I got to recognize a lot of the homeless dogs and their owners as I explained to the Displaced Dog that security did not need to be defended so vigorously. All of the homeless dogs that we got to know were in good health, very well loved, and well provided for.

Discipline, Sidd, discipline
 

What an amazing coincidence. I met a stripper last weekend as well. And I think she really likes me.

str8.

aggressive panhandling
 

This may or may not be true. In general, I ignore animals as much as possible.

However, I think it is bizarre that a person who cannot take care of himself would have a pet. I find it even more bizarre that these pets are well provided for. I no longer give any money to a person begging for it, and will certainly not give them any money to feed their pets. I imagine I am paying the food and vet tabs for the pets of many welfare recipients, just like I am paying to raise their obnoxious kids. But I do this very, very grudingly and because the government says I have to.

Also, there is no reason for a sane able-bodied person to be a beggar. Get a fucking job. You are not above McDonalds.

Don't even get me started on drug addicts.

Discipline, Sidd, discipline
 

But will she let you shoot her with paintballs?

Edited to add, that I so regret being the setup for such an obvious obvious comeback line. Please resist.

Discipline, Sidd, discipline
 

Str8, I'm sure you know this by now, but they all really like you until the song ends and the $$$ run out...

aggressive panhandling
 

My vote for "city with most aggressive panhandlers" is New Orleans. Even worse than London (the Scots come down south for the winter and, boy, they can be rough).

Nicest? The panhandlers in Chicago actually were pretty docile. But I might have to give my vote to Witchita, Kansas, where they are very corn-fed and laid back seeming. (If that counts as a major city.)

Discipline, Sidd, discipline
 

No dude, this one's different. She REALLY likes me.

str8

Discipline, Sidd, discipline
 

If so, I'm happy for you (and a bit jealous)...

Just don't want you to end up being the deluded middle-aged guy going to the strip club by himself who thinks all the ladies like him for his charm. Don't be that guy.

Trash talkin Lance
 

Frightening thought, but Petacchi seems faster than Cipo.

No one can beat Mario coming off his wheel because he has the high sustained speed, but Petacchi blows people away coming from behind and sweeping across with no lead out.

He's scary fast.

Even(I preferred the flayed body suit and the lion suit)Odds

aggressive panhandling
 

1. Its PeNske, damnit!; and

B. You are from here, so maybe you know the guy of whom I speak. I usually see him on the west side of 1st Ave., somewhere between Union and Seneca, most often right at corner of 1st and Seneca, where the 99 off ramp is.

When you are next in Seattle, stake out that area for a couple of days and you'll see him. He's the panhandler with a dog. go up and ask him if a boyishly good looking metrosexual drops him 5-10 once a week.

Oh the humanity indeed!

aggressive panhandling
 

Those guys asking you to give them your shirt were not, repeat NOT panhandlers.

not7y(Got Beads?)S