No Slot C Rippage
 

WHile I am admittedly not the pornisseur that you are, I ahve to say it isnt THAT common like less than one in ten shots in a non fetish (which is not to say no asian chicks, Atticus) porno. Perhaps you are an assman and tend to get the movies like Baby Got Back ten which cater to men who like asses and then go the extra step .

I am now wondering if self avowed assmen (such as SD) tend to dig anal more than a breastman or legman. Do breastmen enjoy giving pearl necklaces more ? Probably.

And if so, does this mean that Ben Affleck, who is into the biggest ass in the business, is really into anal and possibly really a gay? With Matt DAmon?

Also, in Family Business, I noticed that the c
ute jewish porn producer guy seemed to be personally into female ejaculate and anal. So maybe its not so much a market demand driven thing as it is just the moviemakers personal taste?

No Slot C Rippage
 

Does anyone remember what inspired the fashion guy on QESG to say something like "everyone looks good in a pearl necklace"?

Menu Question
 

A good friend who has no interest in being in a serious relationship feels screwed by not getting a big party unless she gets married, so she is considering having a giant bash catered for herself instead. As she has assured me she will not make me wear a poofy pastel unbridesmaid's dress, I am going to get her a hell of a present. She's right, why shouldn't she?

No Slot C Rippage
 

I would say it's more like 4 in 10 shots (or scenes, as not to confuse anyone). It seems like every vanilla porn has some spelunking in it.

No Slot C Rippage
 

Wasn't it because the SG's girl was very nicely put together and her outfit included a quaint little pearl necklace? It went something like "Oh wow, she looks great, very classy, even has on a nice pearl necklace" ..... "Well, everyone looks good in a pearl necklace <smirk>"

Of course, it does not top my favorite -- "A hooker in Trenton is looking for her shoes."

edited to say that HeatBlister is probably right on this one -- I think I got it confused with the proposal guy and his very "classy" babe.

Slot C Action
 

Buy her a strap on. From the whiny tone of your post, it sounds like you'd like get pegged.

TM

No Slot C Rippage
 

Gape shots and atm seem to be becoming more common.

qefsg
 

They were having the LI husband buy a pearl necklace to match the earrings he had given his wife years earlier. I think the earrings were the only gift he had ever given her. In the episode that reminded us all that foie gras is not for everyone.


Edited to fix typo and change re:line. Enough with the slot c rippage.

Menu Question
 

Hell yeah (do I have nothing else to do today?). At my first wedding, my father and mother stood with me before I went down the aisle and said "You don't have to do this. We can just go to the reception hall and have a kick ass party fo no particular reason." I should have done that. Not that the first hubby was a bad guy -- I guess they just knew I would end up walking out on him eventually.

Menu Question
 

He wasn't a bad guy, but you walked out on him?

Menu Question
 

Uh, because it completely mistakes a wedding for a day-long celebration of the existence of the bride?

I guess WASPs need to come up with their own bat mitzvahs and quinceañeras before we can finally reclaim the wedding ceremony from the bride's raging ego.

Mars and Venus
 

Too true.

Further, although never married myself, I have been a best man twice, been a groomsman 11 times, and have been to at least 50 other weddings - of all shapes and sizes.

And I don't think I have EVER, EVER eaten a piece of wedding cake. Most of the time, I don't even see the cake once it is cut [and/or mushed into the newlyweds faces - usually a harbinger for divorce]

not7y(drinkin', dancin', flirtin' fool)S

Menu Question
 

Atticus, you are tops on my crush list, but the sex fantasy doesn't work for me when you show up in breeches and a doublet.

Menu Question
 

Let's just say that when I graduated from law school he was content where we were and I was ready to come screaming out of the starting gate. He needed a nice girl with a job -- not a tornado with a career. And he didn't like baseball -- he wanted to move back near his parents after I finished school and I wanted to move to be near my "boys of summer." Just friends who never should have taken it further (well, I mean we could have still fucked because the sex was great but we shouldn't have gotten married).

No Slot C Rippage
 

spelunking. that's hot. tex.

Alphabet Soup
 

I think this is where I'm supposed to get all pissed off and do the whole "You fucker, you implied I want it in the ass, and that means I'm gay, and I'm not, really, but I'll kick your sweet, sweet ass if you imply that I am again" thing, right?

I've always thought that men's aversion to discussion of action with their own Slot C is kind of homophobic. We've all got prostates, and I am down with some Slot C action via Tab D or one or two of Tabs E through I, but a plasticky fake Tab A seemed kind of cold and uninviting when a previous girlfriend poked it Slot C's way. Mostly, I think that my lack of interest in my Slot C getting worked is due to the fact that the worker wouldn't be able to give much attention to Tab A, then.

Which brings me to standard male fantasy number one, two Slot Bs at once. Still working on that one. The current recipient of my affection is definitely not into that.

Menu Question
 

Wow!

Menu Question
 

You sound like my sock puppet. Except that I don't buy expensive purses. Any kind of purse makes me look like a guy with a purse, which is not a good look for most guys.

Seriously, though, I don't "get" the baby thing. They sit there and spit and poop. I would rather sit with my grandmother and listen to Celene Dion records than play with someone's kid--and she is dead so you can imagine how much I hate them. I don't even feign interest.

Good for you. I hope you used lots of cuss-words. Sometimes people just don't get the message until you call their kid a couple of four-letter words, insult their mommas and question the paternity of their family members.

Why would you go to a wedding for the cake? I can buy a lot of cake for a few hundred bucks. And not cheap cake either. I am talking like Entenmans or one of those other classy cakes.

No Slot C Rippage
 

I can take it or leave it. You have to at least try it with everyone you date just to make sure you've explored every facet of the SO's sexual personality, but its not something I have a strong deire to do.

S(I can't see myself tagging my wife in the ass on a regular basis... unless she really dug it)D

Alphabet Soup
 

One of my best friends loves having slot C action. He likes it so much his wife thinks he's bi.

S(don't ever let a woman perform oral on slot C - its very uncomfortable*)D

* Totally twisted chick did this, not my wife.

No Slot C Rippage
 

Thank you. My MO for the FB is to turn everyone on.

Alphabet Soup
 

okay, Tab A is the winky, Slot B is the cooch, Slot C is the bummy, Tabs E through I are the fingers so Tab D would be...OMG, tongue in the bummy? :eek:

Alphabet Soup
 

Sebby, you sure seem to have a lot of "friends" who have told you a lot of details about their sex lives, which, conveniently, were all relevant to today's discussion topics.

First time for everything
 

Well said, RP. Carry on.

not7yS

Alphabet Soup
 

Deleted double post (Sorry. This time it's jet lag that caused the quote rather than edit glitch.)

No Slot C Rippage
 

I am not a connassieur of porn, so enlighten me. I think I can figure out what a gape shot is, but what is an "atm"?

Slot C Redux
 

I dig it, but only as an occasional novelty. And it's good only with lover who you are familiar with; it's not first date kind of stuff. The feeling is very different and probably benefits the man more than the woman (after all, it's not directly hitting the bean), but I think that it can still be pleasurable for both parties when done correctly and carefully and with appropriate lubricants.

As for its prevalence in porn, I think that's probably due to the perceived pain and degredation of it. Which is too bad, because I don't think that sex should really be about demeaning or belitting someone, even in porn. But that's a big aspect of porn, along with the direction of ejaculate towards faces and breasts.

Me, I just like the nudity and the fucking.

No Slot C Rippage
 

Gape shjots? atm? clarify

Slot C Redux
 

The understatement of the year. Not that I have actual knowledge, but I would be aghast if a first date asked me to spelunk.



We should put this in a parenthetical after the current board motto.

No Slot C Rippage
 

A gape shot shows something gaping open after something has been inserted to it for a little while. I think atm is short for ass to mouth.

Slot C Redux
 

Hitting the bean is not the only way women have orgasms, and Slot C action, done correctly, can be amazing.

Even(or so SD's friends have told me)Odds

Alphabet Soup
 

They're not talking about a big pink soda can, sister... (or at least I hope not).

Alphabet Soup
 

Why is it uncomfortalbe/ Does she have scales on her tongue or are you just empathetic to how gross it must be to stick one's tongue into the nasty sweaty hairy ass of a man?*

*Getting on the assterick bandwagon. I assume that a woman eating Slave's ass out would not face a nasty sweaty hairy ass but would have a serious case of razor burn.

Porn - point/counterpoint
 

I've wondered it myself, and I think it has less to do with the desire of men to do it, more to do with the taboo aspect and "ease" aspect as presented on screen.

I [and many guys I know] just don't enjoy it because it is far too much work. Slow to begin. Products required. Can be very (usually) messy. And once started, will preclude other acts.

In porn the porn world - just as every hospital patient is healthy and soon to be fucked by two tanned enhanced nurses in high heels and a whymple - a guy will, voila, just start doing anal, then go to oral, and vaginal, without nary a concern.

not7yS

speaking of porn cliches, I've yet to meet a woman who owned up to wanting to do a DP

point/counterpoint
 

do you mean double penetration?

Alphabet Soup
 

Hey, I have loads of friends... and sex is a topic I like to discuss. its easy and rarely gets boring.

Now if you're insinuating that I am actually the friends I'm speaking of, well, I see your point. All I have is my word. I do not like slot C action, but yes, like most men, I've had it done to me by a woman fond of experimenting.

We haven't discussed anything terribly exotic today. Maybe the blood thing, but even that's pretty commonplace shit.

S(Now if I could recall law like I can recall high school drunk stories....)D

No Slot C Rippage
 

1. Slot C adapts to the presence of Tab A. After time, Slot C stays open after the removal of Tab A. The brown eye is wide open. Gaping, if you will.

2. Ass-to-mouth.

Slot C Redux
 

I had a first date with a hot tex ask me if he could go down on me. I thought that was inappropriate first date behavior, certinaly not for a classy lady like me, so I just fucked him.

No Slot C Rippage
 

And now I know why my dad calls Alec Baldwin a gaping asshole. I cannot blelieve that is the source of my dad's beloved term. I feel like I just walked in on my parents having sex.

No Slot C Rippage
 

Would such gaping not cause problems? This aspect now makes it seem like a very, very bad idea.