Cord Blood Banking
 

I'm sorry. I couldn't resist. It's an illness . . .

Cord Blood Banking
 

I can't. "I lost my child. I want the same exact fucking one. How much will it cost?" Nope. Don't get it.

This makes perfect sense.

TM

Doula question
 

We took a birthing class led by a doula, whom we concluded was a total flake. We had no interest in having her anywhere near the delivery. Surely other doulas are less flaky, though.

Doula question
 

Thanks for your help, everyone.

I ran across one who is not only a certified massage therapist, but also not at all flaky (which was my number one concern - anyone breaking out the incense and chanting about the goddess midlabor is asking for a slapping), so I'm leaning towards hiring her.

GWNC - thanks for the offer, but don't go out of your way; I prefer to imagine you and your torso having conversations on sexier topics than labor ...

Doula question
 

Re Doulas - I hear very good things about them. Especially if the daddy is not comfortable around hospitals, medical procedures, pain, etc. Had I not been giving birth to a toddler, I might also have looked into a birthing center, but with a 10+lb baby, the risks seemed too high if away from a hospital. I would see if you can get some referrals from people who have used one in your area, from local birthing centers, or at least references from the one you are interested in now - this is one thing you can't do over if you aren't happy with her performance and you won't have anything to compare to along the way.

Doula question
 

Surely. We did a lot of hippie-dippy things around both of our kids' births, but we skipped the doula each time, even though we were connected with several opportunities for various reasons. We decided that it seemed like a pretty intimate moment into which to bring a paid stranger --- and no, we didn't regard our midwife as a stranger either time.* We also decided that good birth or bad birth, we wanted it to be remembered on our own ability to rise to the occasion. In other words, I had to be The Guy.

That said, we learned at our second birth that another hand on the other side of the laboring woman is appreciated. It helps, but is not essential, that the woman have given birth herself once or twice, although in our case she hadn't. Find a caring person in your life who already means something to you, other than your spouse, and you will have a rewarding experience. Being told that you're brave and strong is great, but it's 30 times greater when you're told that by someone who really loves you.

I've never met anyone who's said "shoulda had a doula" or "shouldn'ta had a doula." No harm in it.

*Also, as strange as she was, she was paid by the insurance company, so if she was a paid stranger she wasn't paid by me.

Cord Blood Banking
 

Freezing's good `cause you just can never have enough of something. But here its especially good b/c when your kids are in their 30's and claim what angels they were as kids, you can unfreeze a few of them and introduce them as refuting evidence.

Cord Blood Banking
 

Why not just get a video camera, record their worst food-flinging moments and other tantrums, and then trot that sucker out at convenient times, including weddings and such?

Cord Blood Banking
 

More effective (and vengeful) to wait for them to turn 30 and then lock them in a room with their toddler selves** for a whole weekend. Videos can be ignored unlike one's toddler self.

**Oh sorry. I meant later born twinself.

Cord Blood Banking
 

Except that the second time around you'll be able to do everything right and they won't be terrors at all.

Cord Blood Banking
 

Yes. In theory communisms works.

Cord Blood Banking
 

Yeah. Right. "Second time"? Freeze the little suckers.

Doula question
 

I ended up wishing I'd had a doula the first time. My husband is wonderful, and he went to all the Bradley classes with me, but our relationship is not structured in such a way (and his personality is not such) that he can take charge and tell me what to do, which is what I really needed during hard labor and transition. My mom was a good leg holder (better than my husband), but it would have been even better to have someone there who was a little more active before the pushing stage, encouraging different positions, telling me to go ahead and throw up (it's very productive in labor), etc.

That reminds me--I need to start looking for one.

Oh, and btw, it's a boy, and a big strapping one to boot. We know exactly when he was conceived (since it happened in a petri dish), but the ultrasound tech said based on his size she would have given him a due date about 10 days earlier. I'm a little sad I'll almost surely never have a girl, but I'll just have to take my nieces shopping a lot.

tm

Doula question
 

No wonder you're dreaming about me.

TM

Doula question
 

Whenever you write about your family I just get a warm feeling- you are truly blessed, but i suspect you earn the blessings!

Doula question
 

So, did he loan you the money?

Schiavo case
 

[Long rant about Schiavo case] Views anyone on the husband as the guardian?

Doula question
 

Definitely worth it. If you think you want to deliver naturally I would highly recommend a doula, regardless of how supportive your spouse may be. You can certainly find down-to-earth doulas who will support you if you decide mid-way through that you want narcotics or an epidural. But they are most useful obviously if you want to give yourself a better chance of doing it naturally and avoid additional interventions.

I delivered naturally (despite being given pitocin) but I probably would've thrown in the towel and gotten an epidural had I not had the support of a doula. It's important that you think the personality fit is a good one, even if you still feel like the personal is a relative stranger. She'll be less of a stranger than your nurse and likely MUCH more helpful and comforting.

It may see, like a lot of $$$ (and generally insurance won't cover it) but if you have the cash and want to deliver naturally, it's totally worth it.

Good luck!
Techielawyer

(mom to a happy 7 mo old)

Schiavo case
 

Here's a pretty good summary of the case so far: http://abstractappeal.com/schiavo/infopage.html

I actually admire the husband in some ways because I think he is sticking to his convictions about what she would want. The easier thing for him to do would have been to give up custody and let her parents keep her alive. And in response to the inevitable follow-up, no, I don't think he's doing it for the money. Why put yourself through the public scorn and hatred for some bit of cash?

Schiavo case
 

No one respond to this part of ncs' post. That way she can go back and edit once she realizes "why" isn't the big question. The big question is "do people put themselves through public scorn and hatred for some bit of cash?" Of course, the answer is yes.

Not taking a side in the issue, I'm just a logic timmy.

Peninula Real Estate
 

It seems like quite a few of the regulars on this board are from the SF Bay Area. Any advice on the state of the housing market in the South Bay? Understood that it's expensive as hell; I'm looking for feedback on how much inventory is out there, whether it still takes bidding over the ask to get a place, etc. Also, any insight on specifics regarding Mt. View neighborhoods would be great. We've already decided to go the private school route so at least for now we're not bound by school district requirements. As such, we're not even looking at PA, Los Altos, Menlo, and some of the other truly stratospherically expensive areas but hoping that in the "slums" of Mt. View you can still find a hovel for less than $1MM (ideally, at least 1500 sq. feet in order to squeeze in the 5 of us).

Thanks in advance.

Peninula Real Estate
 

the wall street journal and economist have both recently said that you'd have to be an asshat to but in the SF area these days because of the relative values of renting v. buying. See March 23 WSJ and March 5 economist

Peninula Real Estate
 

Jesus. This may be the fattest city in the country, but damn it's affordable.

-T(counting my blessings)L

Peninula Real Estate
 

I was saying that two years ago just before I bought. Since then my house has gone up 30% and I've had two years of deductible interest. It's not sustainable, of course, but I'm glad I didn't listen to myself two years ago.

Baby Shower
 

My darling cousin is having a baby boy and I want my present for her shower to be nice. She gave me a TON of clothes for Viet Babe. I bought a really cute black and white cow thing that stands up a few feet and can be used as either a hamper or to hold toys (usually a hamper). I'd like to stuff it with a lof of clothes for various ages (or maybe just for the infant stage - doesn't matter - she has nothing). How can I do this without spending a bundle? I know Ebay has the bulk clothing thing going on but darn I used my Paypal limit and I can't get "verified" because Paypal doesn't take verifications from my bank (a huge one) and I'm not opening a new bank account somewhere just for Paypal. Ideas?

Baby Shower
 

You do know you can paypal with a credit card, right?

Baby Shower
 

OK, I'm cheap, but so what...

Do you have a Marshall's up there? TJ Maxx? Carter's Outlet? Osh Kosh Outlet? Also, last I looked Big Lots had Tyke's (Carter's Brand) infant sleepers for $2.50 - cannot beat that. Sam's/Costco always have good quality baby clothes for a fair price too. And no, they are not name brand, but Walmart baby clothes are really decent - they are cute enough, they wear well, and if they stain, it's not like you are out a lot.

I scored the Lexling some $30 Levi's for $.99 at Ross recently and picked up some Carter's crib sheets for $1.99ea. for the new kiddo; disgusting, dirty, store, but very good prices on baby stuff. Worth a trip if you have one near and some of that Purell hand disinfectant for when you leave.

Baby Shower
 

In the last two weeks (since finding out the sex of Number Two), I've spent about $350 on baby clothes. If you want serious bulk (what I've bought would about fill one of those hampers), you're going to spend a chunk no matter what you do (even at $3-5/item, it adds up quickly).

About half of what I've spent was at a resale shop, and half at Old Navy. Resale is great for the littlest sizes because kids wear them for such a short time that they don't show significant wear. I also like it because I am picky about colors (no red and navy for my baby boys--I like Easter egg colors), and you can select from clothes spanning multiple seasons and multiple brands in one place. My favorite score yesterday was a slew of those sacks for newborns at $3 apiece.

Old Navy is great for stocking up on basics like bodysuits and socks (8 pairs for $10 at the moment). I'm also a total sucker for their cloth crib shoes, which are available in a myriad of cute color combinations (plus the more standard tan, white and navy) and are on sale right now. And it's spring, so they have a lot in my favorite Easter-eggy colors.

Good luck!

tm

Gladiators: You versus [X] Five Year Olds.
 

Stolen from another board I frequent, but seemed applicable here.

Your test, should you choose to accept it, is to see how many 5 year old kids you could take on at once. The Rules Are:

• You are in an enclosed area, roughly the size of a basketball court. There are no foreign objects.
  
• You are not allowed to touch a wall.
  
• When you are knocked unconscious, you lose. When they are all knocked unconscious, they lose. Once a kid is knocked unconscious, that kid is "out."
  
• I (or someone else intent on seeing to it you fail) get to choose the kids from a pool that is twice the size of your magic number. The pool will be 50/50 in terms of gender and will have no discernable abnormalities in terms of demographics, other than they are all healthy Americans.
  
• The kids receive one day of training from hand-to-hand combat experts who will train them specifically to team up to take down one adult. You will receive one hour of "counter-tactics" training.
  
• There is no protective padding for any combatant other than the standard-issue cup.
  
• The kids are motivated enough to not get scared, regardless of the bloodshed. Even the very last one will give it his/her best to take you down.

I'd say I could take 20 -- at least for a while -- mostly by playing them off against each other and perhaps swinging one from the foot as a club, to keep a clear circular buffer between me and the mini-combatants.

Mostly, I posted this to simply to see what bilmore's historical limit was.

Gattigap

Baby Shower
 

Thanks! This is great. I had totally forgotten Marshalls. I have one less than 10 minutes away. I'm all over that. We don't have a Ross near us but it reminded me that we have Daffy Dan's and it is supposed to have fantastic designer baby clothes marked way way down. I used to shop for hip fashions there as a teen. As for Old Navy, I forgot about them. I am going to check out their "marked way down clearance" section on their website b/c we don't have one too close to us.

As for Paypal, I was using it for years with a credit card. You eventually reach a lifetime limit imposed by Paypal after which you MUST get "verified" through your bank account even if you plan to continue using a credit card. The ridiculous verification process includes you waiting for Paypal to put in 3 small nominal deposits directly into your bank account and then you have to call Paypal and say how much the deposits were and all other nonsense. I kept trying to do this and calling my bank and hearing that I wasn't getting the 3 deposits. I sent numerous emails to Paypal and they ignored them all. I then found out over the Internet that there is a huge group of people who bitch about Paypal because the same thing happened to them: we all have accounts at a particular bank (a big popular one) but Paypal does not allow its verification process with this bank. Instead of telling you that, Paypal just blows you off and you never know why you the verification process isn't working. They are losing so much business! I even called the director of marketing and told him the problem. He did nothing. And, what's more, they won't tell you which banks they DO verify with (in case you feel like opening an account at a new bank that is) because "we're not allowed to give you this information." Okay!

Sorry for the rant.

Baby Shower
 

I polled my Mommy Board for you:

Rumor has it that www.oldnavy.com and www.childrensplace.com have $5 flat rate shipping.

Kohls usually has free shipping if you spend enough.

If you go through ebates.com you get a discount from www.oldnavy.com and www.BabyCenter.com.

Also suggested - the overstocks section of www.landsend.com for nice blankets & diaper bags.

Baby Shower
 

Bastards. Can't you just open up a new Paypal account under a different Ebay username with a different CC or are they on to that sort of thing somehow?

Baby Shower
 

I followed this painful process to get verified. After verification, you end up needing to constantly change their default dinging of your account instead of your credit card - it's a pain in the neck.

Can you just limit yourself to ebay listings that will take other than paypal?

At the same time, I don't think I could live without my ebay/paypal fix. Have you discovered the kids books auctions? There are regular listings where you can get like 100 books and they often go at $20 or so bucks. We weed through them to get the 50 books our kids will enjoy and give the other 50 to a charity. We've bought thousands.

Baby Shower
 

Oooh yeah, I'd almost forgotten about this. I've bought only a few clothing items from there, but I did buy a closeout diaper bag a few months ago (I think I may have bought it before I actually got pregnant, which was a bit of a gamble) that I can hardly wait to use. The other item I've really liked from there was a pair of rubber boots--green frog princes, complete with crowns. I just looked and some of the patterned rainboots, in small sizes, are available on overstocks right now.

My first diaper bag I bought at bluefly.com. Five years ago, black diaper bags were few and far between, but bluefly had a Nicole Miller one lined with a really cute print of shoes, for only $30.

tm

Nice job, guys.
 

http://apnews.myway.com/article/20050331/D895U2VO1.html

Confused Cops Swarm Woman After Birth

Mar 31, 6:39 AM (ET)
KETTERING, Ohio (AP) - A woman rushing to a hospital to give birth hit a few stops along the way - first at a gas station where she delivered the baby herself, then when confused police ordered her out of the car at gunpoint.

Debbie Coleman, whose 3- and 4-year-old daughters were asleep in the back seat, pulled over at a gas station just after midnight Tuesday.

"I asked if she needed help, and she just leaned back in the seat, hollered a little, and I looked down and there was the baby's head," said station co-owner Lloyd Goff, who was alerted to the emergency at pump No. 7 by a customer.

Goff said Coleman "threw her leg over the steering wheel, groaned once, and the rest of the baby came out.

"She caught that baby, put it to her chest, gave me a look, like, 'I gotta go,' closed the door, put the van in gear and away she went."

A customer at the gas station in suburban Dayton tried to give police a heads-up about Coleman's situation, but a mix-up involving the license plate number had them thinking the van was stolen.

As officers went looking for her, Coleman headed for the hospital, naked below the waist and with the baby boy in her arm. His umbilical cord was still attached.

"I kept pulling over, making sure (the baby) was all right, breathing," she said.

Meanwhile, police had straightened out the license plate issue. But another caller mistakenly reported someone trying to throw a baby from a van.

Coleman said she noticed several cruisers following her before one cut her off. With guns drawn, officers ordered her out of the van with her hands up.

"I opened the door and said, 'I just had a baby' and just let them see everything," she said.

Officers sent Coleman on and let the hospital know she was coming.

Coleman was discharged Wednesday. Her 6-pound, 8-ounce son, Richard Lee Coleman Jr., remained in intensive care.

Nice job, guys.
 

Goddam crazy woman drivers.

hello again
 

{okay clearly its been a while because iposted this as a new thread accidently}

Hi everyone, i am back after about a year long absence.... I see some familiar faces ...baltassoc - how are the twins? vietmom - your still here so i guess Vietbabe finally went to sleep!!! hmmm didn't realise i missed folks... lol

I left private practice and took an in-house kinda job and its kinda stinks but I get 28 days of personal time, work 7:30-4:30 and no nights and weekends...sounds like a dream right? Other than the days of this job is mind boggling boring, very little lawyering and I literally surf the net about 4 hours a day, and I still got an excellant review....

So i run into this well known attorney I've known since I was a law student (went to the same law school) and he asks me what I am doing etc... and at the end of our conversation, he asks me to interview for a part time position at his boutique litigation firm..... he has done this before but I decide, what the heck let's hear what he is offering...and cut to the chase I am extremely interested!!! Of course we still have to talk compensation etc....

My little people are 2 and 3 so the part time aspect is appealing and honestly - I miss really practicing .... and there is a new female partner who is a MOM and committed to being one ...

oh and there is a very big chance i may get laid off at the current gig anyway - not soon, but I am guessing within a year - corporate realignment doesn't seem to have my department on the chart in my area and I am not relocating for a job this tedius......

Is there a question counselor....? Being a very small firm there is not 'guideline' and i need to figure out what structure to propose - the only thing I am sure of is a 4 day week as opposed to 5 short days because i KNOW getting out can be difficult....help please - I have only done the big firm thing where they tell you what your getting and that's that.......

suggestions, ideas, questions are welcome....

hello again
 

Hi Mommylawyer. Welcome back. And thanks for asking -- Vietbabe is a very good sleeper; in fact I just put her to bed. And she no longer cries for no reason and is a happy kid. I can't answer the part time question for you, but I am part time and I could give you some things to think about with that.

Your current job -- if you are starting at 7:30 am you probably are just sending the kids off (or leaving yourself) in the a.m. without really seeing them so if being part time gives you more flexibility or morning time and you want that -- that would be a plus on the part time side. On the other hand, if you have set hours at your in house job and you aren't doing any work in the evening and weekend, there's something to be said for predictibility -- both for you and for your kids to have expectations about when you will or will not be with them. Because with part time, at least for me, I check work email until the second I go to bed and after Vietbabe goes to bed, always do some work related things (time sheets, reading emails, articles on topics in my area of law, and also "real work"). It really never ends and you are always "on." On the other hand, if you need to make a doctor's appointment in the middle of the day, you can go ahead and do so and you can usually swing some hours during the week to do things you need to do or spend time with the kids. Unless you can really say the new law firm job you are considering is something you can pick up and put down fairly easily, then you should think of the part time job as really being a "flex job". I really think if it is important that you have your evenings free after the kids are asleep, you need to consider that you will probably be preparing for one thing or another (or playing catch-up) in the evening. If you are up until midnite, you may become annoyed that you took a salary cut and now you are working into the wee hours or fielding calls all the time. I still prefer the flexibility even if I'm always "on" as a part-timer and even if I do work at night/check email.

Just some things to consider.

Nice job, guys.
 

I'm sorry but I have found cops to be complete creeps. I got a parking ticket that had a court return date of 9/11/2001 (yep) and paid it before then but apparently some computer screw up happened in the system that spits out warrants for arrests for no-shows (the courts were closed the rest of the day). Or some kind of mess up, I forgot. I got it straightened out and rode around forever with the "evidence" of the warrant error but guess I threw it out a few years later (I hadn't been pulled over since getting the parking ticket).

Fast forward to this past October (mischief night - night before Halloween of all nights) and I'm driving home from my sister's with Vietbabe asleep in the back at 9 pm. My parents and g-parents are riding in their car ahead of me. Cop in quiet town pulls me over because he says the light on my license plate seemed too dim. He does his thing on his walkie talkie thing and then tells me he has to bring me into the station because there is a warrant out for my arrest in another town (that 9/11 ticket thing).

Luckily I had called my parents on my car phone and kept it on the whole time and Dad (also a lawyer) could hear what was happening. He told the officer very nicely, "I'm her Dad and there is a 2 year old sleeping in the car seat in the back" (Cop cuts in, "Yeah, sir, I saw that and I don't care - there's a warrant) and Dad says please just wait for him to turn around and meet us so he can take the baby. The Cop tells Dad no! He will not wait for Dad to get to us (like 2 minutes away).

So Dad tells me "Don't you dare get out of the car or go to the station until I get there". Cop tells Dad, "Sir...if she doesn't get out of the car right now I'm going to cuff her and read her her rights." I didn't know who to listen to. Luckily Dad showed up and a crazy attempt to transfer the car seat to the car with my parents and g-parents ensued. All so I could go to the station and for everyone to find out it was all a mistake (I posted "bail" and then got the bail refunded b/c there was never an effective warrant). At the station, the cop tried to tell my Dad he couldn't go into the station with me (even when he said he'd be my attorney). He went in anyway.

I can't believe how nice my Dad was throughout and how mean the Cop was even though Dad and me were polite throughout. The only other person at the station that night was another cop. He had liquor on his breath (I can tell because I don't drink). Oh what a night to remember.

Um...what was the question? Long enough so I'll leave out the part where I got home, and then took the cat to the all night vet to have him put down because he had destroyed the last piece of furniture in the house with his pee problem despite being on expensive anti-depressent meds.

Whew.