Sun Damage
 

My current body obsession has moved on from my relative fatness to the freckles on my shoulders.

Does anyone know of any non-retin A cosmetic to reverse my teenage beach baby years?

E/O

Duvet
 

HAH! Why didn't you say something sooner? I wouldn't have minded, just send me a PM next time.

Horror, humor
 

<-------------- So, we're not the only Lovecraft fans who surf the Web. Who knew?

Two years later, and there's STILL no friction? Time to cut a hole in a pumpkin. Maybe Penske can help; I hear he has some experience with these things.

Duvet
 

Damn. It was supposed to be Thurgeek.

Communist plants
 

OK, I can hold my tongue no longer. Avoid the "lucky bamboo" it brings mosquitos into the country. Plus they come from China (communists that they are).

In addition, I have never ironed my sheets, but 100% cotton pillowcases get all knotted up in the dryer, and if you don't iron them, the crease keep creasing in the same place and you'll never get them out. Still, I'm less anal than all of you.

"Lucky bamboo has long been sold by Asian gardeners and nursery owners in Southern California. But it has become trendy recently in the United States because it is used in feng shui, the increasingly popular Chinese art of arranging one's living spaces to enhance positive energy.
Sold in 15-centimeters (6-inch) stalks, lucky bamboo sends out slender green shoots when placed in water like a cut flower." Recently, though, the charmed plant ran into some bad luck.
Shipments of lucky bamboo have brought another Asian import, tiger mosquitoes, to Southern California. In Asia the insects have been known to carry viruses that cause serious infections.
No cases of disease transmitted by the mosquitoes have been documented in the United States. And so far, the insects have been found only in maritime shipments to Los Angeles. Lucky bamboo is also shipped to San Francisco, Seattle, New York and New Jersey.
As a result, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the U.S. Department of Agriculture and local pest-control agencies have started using pesticides to treat all lucky bamboo shipments arriving in Los Angeles County.
Import restricions are possible if the mosquitoes cannot be controlled, according to the county Health Services Department.
Also banned in Ottawa.communist bamboo

Health Canada advised importers to cease the
importation of Dracaena, an ornamental lily plant better known as Lucky
Bamboo, in standing water due to the potential carriage of exotic mosquitoes
into Canada. Health Canada notified the Canadian Customs and Revenue Agency
to place an embargo on the importation of all shipments of Lucky Bamboo in
standing water arriving at all Canadian ports.

bamboo

Back to our "boring" day.

Sun Damage
 

Get on Epicuren. THey cure everything.

Sun Damage
 

I found Camocare C-spot to help. I think it is pretty widely available at health food/herb etc stores, or online. It uses Ester C and a bunch of herbs. It faded the lighter freckles on my shoulders - took a while though. Use plenty of sunblock when you have it on though.

Murad has a glycolic acid formula that allegedly fades freckles and sun spots.
There is also this stuff http://www.dermstore.com/product_Whi...+Cream_392.htm
for people with hyperpigmentation - it is supposed to "whiten" your skin (interesting choice of words), but a friend's mother uses it for freckles and says it works.

Communist plants
 

Can't you just dump out the water and start over? mosquito eggs go down the drain.

Communist plants
 

Sorry, no. I haven't plugged in an iron since I discovered Downey Wrinkle Release. Fucking amazing. That was last November.

Fuck me for perpetuating the ironing/duvet thread. But to make it more interesting (and topical, especially for me), if you are staying at someone's house for the weekend in their guestroom and you accidentally get semen stains on their white duvet (no duvet cover on the duvet dammit, just a white duvet on the bed), is it ok to just flip over the duvet before you leave or do you have to offer to have it dry-cleaned? how do you say "hey, do you want me to leave you some money to get your duvet dry-cleaned?" without revealing why it needs to be cleaned?

This is a serious question people.

Duvets and office greenery
 

I have a Company Store duvet and cover, and there are handy little ties in the corners of the cover and loops on the corners of the duvet. I just make sure the proper corners are matched up and tied, stuff the body of the duvet into the cover, grab two corners and shake, and voila! it's straight and it won't shift. Highly recommend it.

For office color, I recommend a small bud vase, then just picking up one or two really interesting flowers from one of those ubiquitous (at least here) flower carts every Monday. Also, my mil has some of the nice fake orchids (the big sprays of small yellow flowers), and they look just like the real thing.

tm

PS And you people dry-clean your duvets?!?!? That's really really really really bad for the down, and will cause it to lose all its lofting and insulating properties. If you use a cover, you only have to wash it every five years or so, in a large commercial washing machine with gentle detergent, and a large commercial dryer with several tennis balls or clean sneakers thrown in to prevent lumping.

Communist plants
 

How will they ever know, unless he was shooting something in a quite off-white color due to a diet of asperagus and Thurgreed's Momma's ass?

Duvet
 

Done and done.

Yr humble srvt,
etc.,
A. Grinch, Recording Secty.

How to be a good houseguest
 

One word: texture.

(I was going to write "crust," but that seemed so icky.)

Communist plants
 

The mosquitos are already here by then. The reason they noticed is that they "flew out of the boxes when they opened them." So while they are here, they can breed. This from the article...

The Tiger mosquito is a voracious biter and can effectively transmit many
viral agents, which are not normally indigenous to Canada and the United
States but are potentially harmful to humans and animals. In addition, the
mosquito can transmit viral diseases which already exist in Canada and the
U.S., such as Eastern Equine encephalitis, Western Equine encephalitis, and
La Cross encephalitis, which can cause disease in humans and animals.

Communist plants
 

This just may be my new england priggishness, but isnt it verbotin to fuck or jerk off or whatever while a guest in someone's house? Debtslave? If so, I would say you are best off leaving the sheets and not saying anything bc you WASH sheets and not DRYCLEAN them. Unless the guy has splooge of color.

Communist plants
 

do you want the return quesiton of "Why does it need to be dry-cleaned?" Surely there's someone else you can blame. Like the previous guest.

and, for tmdiva: dry cleaners don't just dry clean. They launder stuff, too, in big commercial dryers that can handle king-sized duvets, which my washer and dryer can't take.

Communist plants
 

First of all, I'd kill you for this. Second, sneak the damn thing out to the drycleaners and send a card with the dry cleaning receipt inside and enough cash to pay for it. They won't notice the comforter is gone until after you've left and by then it's too late.

Communist plants
 

A-hem. Well, it's my understanding that one of the major points in favor of large house parties in the past was that it made liasons easier to accomplish, which would tend to indicate that it's OK to have sex while a guest. However, those people had servants who had to clean everything up so perhaps if the hosts do their own laundry the rule is different.

Since your cleaning service does your laundry, your guests are allowed to have sex at your house.

Or, do oral only and swallow.

Communist plants
 

Ok, that's why I'm never staying with you. And that's the stupidest advice I've ever heard. Sneak out an entire duvet? Send a card with the receipt? What kind of a person wouldn't notice that their guest left and took the freaking duvet? Jesus Christ.

And if you were really worried about stains, would you put a duvet, without a cover, in a guest room? I honestly really like the person I stayed with and the stains were an accident, obviously. I would gladly buy her a new duvet, I just don't want to address the question of why the duvet is no longer pristine.

I got a good suggestion over im though. It was suggested that I accidentally spill hair gel or something on the comforter so then I have a legitimate and non cringe-inducing reason for offering to pay have the thing dry-cleaned. If only I'd thought of that at the time.

Gangs
 

I suspect that unlike the categories "connoisseurs of fine shoes", "practitioners of deviant sexual acts" and "hockey fans," there is not a lot of overlap between "former gang members" and greedy associates. But I could be wrong.

You may have found the one subject upon which no contributor to this board wishes to pontificate upon, a feat that is remarkable in itself.

Everything I know about gangs I learned from Boyz in the Hood and Colors (so, not much, and even then 15 years out of date), but I didn't want you to think we weren't paying attention.

Duvet
 

Woah, there was a discussion about demonic anime sex?

I gotta go back and read more carefully. Apparently, if you skim you miss the good parts.

BR(one advantage real printed books have over the internet - you can count on books to just fall open and the good parts)C

Communist plants
 

OH, the duvet got dirty, not the duvet cover. scratch the last part of my post. you are basically fucked though bc you broke the rule . but maybe the house owner wont notice or is ultra cool about that kind of thing.

Duvet
 

You're telling me. There really wasn't any discussion, I just admitted to having seen it. I can't figure whether people figured I was so kinky it was no surprise I had seen this stuff, or they were so horrified they couldn't comment.

I'm hurt people. Hurt.

:pace:

Communist plants
 

Yeah, if it was just the cover, I would have hand washed it myself and ironed it with scented lavender water. Not a damn thing I can about the duvet itself.

And that's a stupid rule. I think the rule should be that all guestrooms have duvets with duvet covers. That's a better rule than no sex ever in the guestroom.

I don't think the person will notice b/c we did the flip, and it really wasn't that obvious. And the person I was staying with is a relative of the person who created the semen to begin with, so I've decided it's his responsibility to do something about it.

Communist plants
 

First, just kidding on the stealing and avoidance. Sheesh.
Second, agreed, anyone who doesn't put a cover on the damn thing in a guest room is crazy.
But yeah, the hair gel idea is perfect. Or makeup, even better. Then offer to buy a duvet cover (in case they don't know about them or something).

Duvet
 

Actually people were thinking "mental note - check kazaa for kinky anime sex stuff at home tonight". And/or "leagl's the coolest board admin for pointing out about kinky anime porn on kazaa".

I didn't know that a reply was in order...

Communist plants
 

If the whole Lewinsky affair showed us anything, dry cleaning alone doesn't get rid of protein stains. Something like Clorox 2 or another product that breaks down protein will have to be used in addition to the drycleaning to fully get the stain out.

Duvet
 

Heh, it wasn't.

Duvet
 

I'll answer (c):

If you've seen one 16 breasted woman being taken roughly by an alien demon, you've seen them all.

Bitching, please.
 

Where were you when I needed the Hugh Grant mug shot resized? Now you are all stuck with Cornholio.

Communist plants
 

totally, you are just the slut who fucked the sweet nephew, brother, uncle, daddy, etc. in her bed. i think the rule has to do withthe fact that nobody wants to touch anyone else's sex sheets and linens, and that nobody wants to sleep on something that someone else fucked in. Somehow that rule only applies to the home and not hotels. probably bc it is more personal, like you know X and Y fucked in your bed and now you will always have TMI about them .

I Don't Bring You Flowersock posts
 

Well, I guess the jigs up. Of course, as y'all guessed Flower was my sock and my socks are all phoning it in these dayz. At this point we are just left with the memories......

Memories,
Light the corners of this board
Pretty Little Flowered memories
Of the socks we were
Scattered postings,
Of the wit we left behind
LOLs we gave to one another
From the socks we were
Can it be that we were so much more entertaining then?
Or has SFTM re-written every line?
If Yahoo gave us the chance to sock it all again
Tell me, would we? Could we?
Memories, (like Slave’s fuzzy sweater), may be beautiful and yet
What’s too painful to remember
(the whole FB Betty incident?)
We simply choose to forget
So it's the laughing with us
We will remember
Whenever we remember...
The way me and Flower were...

Semen-stained comforters
 

Could you have sponged (not to be confused with spooged) it off somewhat with a damp cloth or something? I guess it might leave a wrinkly area that might be even more noticeable than the actual stains. For next time. Which there may not be ever if you start to abide by "no sex at others' houses" rule.

I think there's not much you can do besides ignore it at this point. I'm sure your friend will let it slide; it's not that big of a deal. Maybe she will think it is hair gel.

Ahhh, California Politics - now that's entertainment!
 

I did notice the reference to demonic anime sex, but I'm not going to follow up on it while at the office. (They made us get rid of KaZaa.) Here's something you can click on safely at the office. From the folks who brought you "We Love the Iragi Infirmation Minister". This will simplify following the California Recall Election.

Apparently the Debating Game is in the works at the Game Show Network. So far Gary Coleman and Mary Carey have signed on. Link here

Horror, humor
 

You're lucky that I no parlay voo fransayce or I might be offended by that post.

Communist plants
 

I think I'd rather be the slut who fucked the relative than the rude houseguest who stole the duvet. (yes, NFH, I know you were kidding. now).

Communist plants
 

Fucking amateur.

1. go to guestbathroom and take out rubbing alcohol.
2. pour alcohol on stain.
3. set fire to stain/duvet
4. start screaming and put out fire.
5. apologize for cooking creme brulee in the guest bedroom and offer to pay for duvet.

The best part is that no one who knows you will believe your friend when s/he tells them that you wrecked her duvet by blow-torching a cliche desert on it--but you would feel like an idiot if s/he told everyone that you got nutt mayo all over the duvet.

Communist plants
 

Ummm..... Isn't semen water soluble? How about just taking a damp wash cloth and dabbing it up, followed by drying the spot with a towel?

I'm pretty sure that would work.

Communist plants
 

That was my suggestion (wanker), but now that RT (who is way cooler than I am) has indicated that people may routinely test their linens for not-visible-to-the-naked-eye semen stains (perhaps with that cool spray stuff and black light like they have on CSI or whatever), that's not going to cut it.

Edited to say: paigow, you left "husband" out of your list of relatives.

Duvet
 

I noticed the "d" should have been a "k" on the welcome screen too. Weird.