Fleeting fame and more.
 

Like I'm going to take style advice from a fucking moose.

Enough Already
 

Here we go again folks. Yesterday I walked into the breakroom and there sits the catalog with obligatory note "help me raise funds for my school and win the 'limo to lunch' prize." School started last Monday for fuck's sake. Then I go home only to discover that my son had been tapped by the "crappy Christmas wrap" fairie. He is only 5 years old. What the fuck. You all know how I feel about this shit (please review numerous ranting posts about the sale of girl scout cookies in my office). My 5 year old child will not be going door to door to sell this crap and they fucking know it -- they know that all this does is force parents of school-aged children to tote these catalogs into their offices and bug the hell out of their co-workers to buy some useless crap. This sucks ass. Despite my very vocal protestations, my HR guy refuses to ban this type of activity from the office. My idiot husband was proud to have discovered that you can e-mail the catalog and announced that he would send it to all of his relatives. Naturally I freaked out -- I don't know these people but it would be a total embarrassment nonetheless. Long story short, I ripped the catalog from his hands, quickly scanned the instructions for what I was looking for and wrote the $40 blackmail check that allows you to "opt out" and still meet your "voluntary commitment." Fuckers.

It knows all! It sees all!
 

Well, based on my non-scientific sampling of your collective posts and some random e-mails I have lying around:

atticus: male
Fugee: male
Penske: female
ncs: goes both ways
mmm: male 2/3 of the time
legal: female
Taxwonk: female
Bilmore: male (an unprecedented 3/3 time)
Str8: female
me: male.
me from real e-mail I sent once: female
c2ed: female
randome female friend: male
other random female friend: female
aunt: female
female cousin: female
best man at our wedding: female
silly skadden summer who sent that e-mail: male
cadwalader associate unhappy exit memo from '98: female
ex-boyfriend: male/female 50/50
Edward Gorey: male
evil partner: male
evil client: female
The Mr: female


So go figure.

Enough Already
 

as will every other kid in the neighborhood so door to door is useless- send to grandma/grandpa, maybe aunts and uncles, but now take the position you don't bring your kid's shit to work, so don't participate in the circle jerk of buying from other's kids- taking this stand requires YOU buy your's kid's gift wrap/ pizza coupons/ etc., but it is much cheaper long run

Enough Already
 

Joe Corbi's pizza has to be the worst tasting stuff on the face of the earth.

I also like it when they try to sell packages of snickers and reeses for $1.25. A four pack of reeses for $1.25??? Fuck, CVS isn't even that expensive.

Enough Already
 

Preach it. Our neighborhood is swarming with junior high and H.S. kids who are paying for school trips and summer basketball camps by selling magazine and newspaper subscriptions door to door. It's practically slave labor for the companies selling this shit, and you're guilted into an essentially consumer transaction where the "product" is irrelevant. I don't want the fucking local paper because it fucking sucks. Why are you making me say this to a 13 year old black kid, instead of your marketing department? Oh, right, because there's a chance I'll say yes even though I don't want your fucking paper, and it's no skin off your nose because the kid only gets paid a small fraction of his sales. Why is this legal, again?

I volunteered for Christmas in April a couple of years ago, in the hopes that I could help a less advantaged person. Instead, we would up painting a public school. What the fuck are we doing in this country, that charities are performing routine maintenance on our public schools? I stayed all day and got a sunburn for it, but I was seething. Our public education system is subsidized by lotteries and bake sales. No wonder we're a fucking joke.

Enough Already
 

At least your kid is selling something tangible. My catholic elementary / middle school used to force us to sell a shitload of raffle tickets for the annual bazzar. Never, not once, after my mom bought whatever our quota was so we didn't have to bug anyone about it, did she win anything. The parish was able to rebuild the whole school off of the income of those bazzars.

There's been a "help raise money for my kid's cheerleading squad" form in the kitchen for a few days now. Fortunately, no one has signed up.

Most of the girl scout troops I know wised up, bought the cookies themselves and sold them outside of grocery stores. Much much easier way to make money than hitting up their parents' friends and colleagues.

Fleeting fame and more.
 

HEY, at least I'm a fucking moose with good hair, baldy.

Enough Already
 

While I agree with your sentiments in general, I must object that I cannot get girl scout cookies even IN the office, and the girls in green don't seem to make the rounds in my neighborhood (probaby because their parents are the only ones buying). As a rabid adict of Samoas, this is a real problem.

I would encourage anyone who has a kid who wants to sell girl scout cookies to post a notice prominently in your workplace as to their availability. If I don't find out, I can't order the 200 boxes required to tide me over until next year.

BR(but if you come by my office in person all sad-eyed asking me to enter your church raffle or sponsor your kid in a walk-a-thon, I will slap you)C

Enough Already
 

I can actually deal with the girl scout cookies. Buy about 4 boxes of em a year. The spouse and I eat a box. Give one box worth away after placing it on the secretary's alcove.

The other two go into the freezer (at the office) for those all-nighters when I'm so pissed off and sucrose deprived that I'll eat about 1/2 a sleeve at once.

ODB Update
 

Fresh out of the beast belly, Russell Jones (aka Dirt McGirt, fka Wu-Tang alumni Ol' Dirty Bastard) is ruling the clubs once again. With his familiar production team, The Neptunes (little known fact: they produced half of his 1999 sophomore album, Nigga Please, before anyone had heard of them), Dirty rides a hard, bouncy beat consisting of his own voice, trademark 'Tunes beats, a synthetic guitar loop, and during the chorus, bells and police sirens that ultimately wind up sounding like the soundtrack for a cartoon chase scene.

People don't really consider Dirty a lyrical monster but he surprises here with stuff like, "I was checking out My Melody before The Blueprint," and, "Twisting up the haze, black/ In back wood, I'm that good at rap when I stay strapped." As the final arrow in the heart of commercial hip-hop, the chorus contains Pharrell's falsetto singing, "Pop shit, bitch, what's up?/ Pop shit, Nigga, what's up?" It'll be in your head after two listens. This song looks to be the surprise hit off the new Neptunes compilation Clones, and the aural phoenix McGirt has been waiting for.

"beast belly?"

I only donate $ and time to left-wing extremists and my local indy radio station.

It knows all! It sees all!
 

Oohh, I go both ways?!? I'm pretty excited to learn that info. Thanks!

PS. Leagl PM me please.

Enough Already
 

Thou Shalt Not Slag Girl Scout Cookies. I don't give a crap that it's clearly parental extortion of vulnerable co-workers and death-inducing artificial crap that could clog the arteries of a rhino in one bite. Have you never had a Samoa?

Enough Already
 

Go easy on the lotteries and bake sales; you're forgetting coke or pepsi, and their exclusive distribution agreements with schools.

Enough Already
 

Isn't there advertising on the walls of schools and also piped in via TV during homeroom? Or was this a short-lived thing that lasted not long after I finished high school?

Edited to add, I think that Coke and Pepsi are "traditional family values" and may somehow be involved with abstinence. So how dare you protest their roles in the education of our children? What kind of communist are you????

Enough Already
 

When we were younger we would always go through whatever fundraising FREE CAR WASH!!!! was around and take them at their word.

ABBA(Girl Scout who never sold cookies)Kiss

It knows all! It sees all!
 

So, this test mirrors . . . . me?

(You DO know lots of things that I would never expect to hear about from Sven the Gargantuan down at the club, or from Dog Pisser, my tattoo'ed 'n burly biker car mechanic.)

Enough Already
 

You may soon hear this debate in a state near you. California (where all dubious trends start) is laying down the law, and banning soda in elementary and middle schools:


C(less caffeine and sugar, more ritalin?)deuced

ODB Update
 

I'm guessing either rehab, or more likely, as coined by the movie Office Space, Federal "Pound [Him] in the Ass" prison...

Enough Already
 

I understand that a recently-added amendment bans red juice drinks, and subsidizes blue drinks.

(Sheesh. They can't sell plain old corn-syrup-in-a-can, yet they can cram the kids full of carbs and sugars in their school lunch and launch them well on their way to FatAmerica. Makes sense to me. I mean, to the extent simplistic jingoism CAN make sense.)

Oslo world's most expensive city
 

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmp...expensive_city

(spree - story about expensive cities)

Top 2 American cities: #4 New York; #9 Chicago

How can Chicago be more expensive than SF?

I am your friend.
 

Because I like you all, I am going to help you. I am going to teach you.

Funny:

Not funny:


You're welcome.

Enough Already
 

What about coffee?

Actually, I rather approve of banning junk food from schools, but I think the real responsibility is for parents to either lay down the law about what kids are allowed to buy at school, or, knowing how effective that is likely to be, simply not provide their offspring with money with which to buy Pizza-Hut and Taco Hell for lunch. Or choke up the extra taxes so schools aren't trying to plug budget gaps like this.

Alternatively, the state could pay the schools to forego such offers.

BR(why regulate when you can contract for it?)C

Enough Already
 

Now that I am in no danger of being impacted by it, I fully support the ban. Why don't we just cough up enough money for the schools so we don't have to turn kids into early-deaths-by-obesity lab rats by cramming them full of crap to pay the teachers?

Hell, I don't mind paying for it, and I can't even stand half the ill-mannered little monsters we're educating.

Enough Already
 

A godless one. Are there any other kind?

Fleeting fame and more.
 

Keep telling yourself that, Sparky. At my advanced age, I tend to do better by focusing on substance over form anyway.

Tax(clearly, I've been doing this tax shit too long)wonk

Oslo world's most expensive city
 

Easy. 1/2 the population in SF is an unemployed exdotcommer. No money, prices go down.

Rock over London, rock on, Chicago...
 

Wesley Willis dead today from surgery-related complications.

RIP

link to the Alternative Tentacles site, which has gone down due to some unexpected heavy traffic.

Fleeting fame and more.
 

Geez, who knew you'd be so touchy about your comb-over?

And it's Snarky.

I am your friend.
 

those who can do. those who can't........

Oslo world's most expensive city
 

And SF wasn't included in the study. Here's a link to the actual USB study, which includes many other similar lists (cost of living, cost of clothing, etc.): http://www.ubs.com/e/media_overview/...L_2003_e_m.pdf

I am your friend.
 

You pathetic little ingrate. You of all socks should be weeping with thankfulness for the morsels of wisdom I occasionally throw your way. Sometimes I wonder why I even bother. Maybe my heart is two sizes too big. But, please, by all means continue to phone it in. What do I care?

I am your friend.
 

Finally, we start getting back to fashion-related topics.

Bedroom Theme Music Revisited
 

You will now have to do without some of the blood-pumping classics. With provocative lyrics such as, "My blue-blooded sweetheart, you don't care about morals, always acting like Western stars do." At least in Thailand.

http://www.cnn.com/2003/SHOWBIZ/Musi...ist/index.html

Next they'll ban trafficking in opium and sex slaves. Slippery slope and all.

Edit: Isn't banning both #1 and #2 inconsistent?

Enough Already
 

I'm pretty sure that I've heard about product placement in textbooks too. I'd think that putting your name in a word problem could backfire and make your intended audience hate you forever, but it's a gamble some companies are willing to take.

Warning Warning
 

The Internet may stop working today.

link to story regarding Sobig.F attack.

Warning Warning
 

"Antivirus researchers at Sophos and F-Secure have discovered that Sobig.F, the worm that has been flooding e-mail in-boxes this week, is programmed to download and run what most are describing as a "unknown program," on Friday at 19:00 UTC (3 p.m. EDT)."

Its three o'clock in the east, and my machined virus has not interrupted my ability to download good porn.

Enough Already
 

Yeah, I think Nabisco and such were sponsoring them.

Math problem:

Janet has three oreos; Ralph has two oreos. How many Oreos do Janet and Ralph have?

Science Question:

Which of the following is not a healthy lunch food:

1) Kraft Macaroni and Cheese
2) Oscar Mayer Lunchables
3) Cheetos
4) carrot sticks packed by mom.

It knows all! It sees all!
 

Connect the Dots = F

As someone who was mechanically emasculated by an algorithm, let me speak for the other similarly situated suitors who are, ostensibly, in touch with their feminine side and are therefore all sensitive and shit:

That machine made me want to cry. And do these pants make me look fat? Are you sure? You don't think they make me look hippy? You are not just saying that are you? Because I don't want to walk out of here in pants that make me look fat, so just tell me if they make me look fat okay? Look, I know you are just saying that, I look like a cow in these pants. You can almost feel see the cellulite through the gabberdine. What do you mean ment don't get cellulite? Are you calling me a liar? You are seeing someone else, aren't you? I want a name. I think I deserve that.

It knows all! It sees all!
 

Do actual women truly do this? I don't spend much time with women, so maybe I am not equipped to render an opinion, but none of the women I hang out with act like this.