Things you have slurped.
 

I'm still around. I just haven't been inspired to post.

___________________

Dua(and VERY busy at work)lit

My mom never did this for my birthday
 

Bizarre birthday behavior sets mom on court course

http://www.sharon-herald.com/localne...ln082703b.html

My mom never did this for my birthday
 

Wow man!! Where did you find that?

My mom never did this for my birthday
 

I usually initially imagine a hot chick when I read stories like this. (Not that this excuses the behavior.) The reality, however, is that the mother is probably obese, greasy and pimply, which explains the boys' failure to respond to her overatures. That, and the story left open their ages. They might be 10 years old for all we know.

I am consistently amazed when I see photos of arrested prostitutes. They must be exceedingly charming if they got some loser to pay to have sex with them. Gross. Pretty woman they typically are not.

My mom never did this for my birthday
 

Forwarded from a friend.....

Gives new meaning to the lyrics, "It's my part and I'll cry if I want to."

I am proving my point right now.
 

Inspiration is not a prerequisite to posting. In fact, the two are generally mutually exclusive.

My mom never did this for my birthday
 

Well mommy is 34, so given the mores of "white trash america" (we'll leave this topic for another thread), my guess is that the proud son would have to be 16 or 17 at most.

I am proving my point right now.
 

exactly.

My mom never did this for my birthday
 

The story said that based on the charges, the boys were under 15.

My mom never did this for my birthday
 

I was . . . ahem . . . referring to post number 20630.

big brother
 

i just realized that I completely forgot this was on last night. what happened? would it be a safe guess to say Jack and erika went up? any sense on how things are going?

Let Us Give Thanks For Our ÄPPLARÖ Bench
 

Ikea bigger than the Bible


You may have heard that the Bible is the greatest. Well, it is not, as Ikea' s information about shelves, lamps and beds is printed in more copies worldwide.

Not the Bible nor Shakespeare or Harry Potter come even close to the Swedish furniture giant. The Ikea catalogue is being printed in more copies than the Bible, according to Dagbladet.

130 million catalogues are just around the corner, in 28 different languages. A total of 36 countries around the world are waiting to receive this year's catalogue, full of flat packed, cheap furniture.

Last year 286 million people visited one of Ikea's 175 stores worldwide and they left a total of NOK 130 billion in the shops.

Okay.

First, how does Dagbladet know so much?

Second, people should be more careful with their NOKs.

[required link]

My mom never did this for my birthday
 

I might point out that it is not that "white trash america" uniquely finds itself in the family way (or engages in activities that could ultimately result it finding itself in the family way) during early teen/late teen/pre-marriage years. Those higher on the pole of society more typically use birth control, the morning after pill, or glorified coat hangers. Just because the evidence is more obvious when the teen mother has and keeps the baby does not mean that those mothers' morals are lesser.

I am proving my point right now.
 

As evidenced by your posts.

Dua(I still *heart* Flower)lit

Host?!? Guest?!?
 

You just answered your own question, porky.

TM

big brother
 

no idea, but I do know that they are planning to drag on, er, I mean extend, the season for 2 more episodes --

Rather than air the finale of Big Brother 4 opposite the debut of Survivor Pearl Islands, CBS has ordered two more episodes of the show, pushing its finale back to Sept. 24, the same evening that ABC debuts The Bachelor 4. Six house guests currently remain. Last week, the show revealed its latest twist, which involved allowing the house guests to bid on "how many weeks they would be willing to inflict a peanut butter and jelly diet on the entire" group; the winner bid the most number of weeks. As Jam! Showbiz reports, "Fans who have leveled harsh criticism at CBS and the show's producers Arnold Shapiro and Alison Grodner for the lack of big money prizes and imaginative surprises this year, were swift in condemning the 'twist' as an absolute letdown."

big brother
 

Yeah, how exactly was putting the veto before the nom supposed to really have any shocking twisty impact?

maybe nobody will get voted off or maybe they will bring Dana back in. Yawn.

My mom never did this for my birthday
 

Please, it is far to late for this flimsy self-defense of your own honor.

Stop waxing woeful over the delta of your maidenhead, we all know that you are familiar with the business end of a corn cob.

big brother
 

They mentioned at the close of yesterday's broadcast that




space




two houseguests would be leaving on the next show.

I have no clue how that happens, but it sounds intriguing.

Host?!? Guest?!?
 

Okay, I'll rephrase the question. Why should Pencil-Dick have all the fun?

if this score doesnt say anorexia, what does
 

SPOILER SPACE





















D.Hantuchova (9) 6 77


J.Vakulenko 0 65

A bagel (the kind without those naughty carbs) followed by a tie break won at 7-5. the interesting part is she was up 5-1 in the tie break. The 300 calories she ate yesterday had probably just run out. Granted, I didnt see the match, but this is a fucked score. She was heavily (no pun) favored to win the match from a talent comparison basis.

EDITED TWICE- first in a futile attempt to line up the scores and second to provide totally unnecessary spoiler space sine I am willing to bet that nobody cares about the results of this match. I barely do myself since Hantuchova aint a contendrix until she starts eating. But it was interesting to note the score.

My mom never did this for my birthday
 

Bitch please. I have no need to defend my own honor, nor did I.

My mom never did this for my bachelorette party
 

http://www.salon.com/news/wire/2003/...per/index.html

Mom attacks stripper who failed to meet expectations at her daughter's stagette.

(I have no idea if someone else has already posted this)

Bravissimo
 

The Bravo website is conducting a poll: Who's your favorite Queer Eye straight guy?

The current standings:

Brian S. 19%
Adam Z. 4%
Tom K. 11%
John B. 40%
Vincent T. 6%
Andrew L. 9%
John V. 12%

It figures John B. is winning by such a large margin, because the demographics compel that a closeted gay man will win as Best SG. However, I am taken aback that Adam Z. is doing so poorly compared to Tom K. and Andrew L. I mean, this is so obviously a popularity contest. Tom K. was dumber than a box of Ahmad Rashads (apologies to Less).

My concern for this show is that eventually they will run out of B&T types who don't know that distinguishable individual eyebrows are in.

Also, Bravo is doing an expose of unscripted TV shows starting the week of September 8th called "The Reality of Reality." Thought you might like to know.

And fuck Fox for cancelling both "Keen Eddie" and "Lucky." Fuck them all to hell.

Reality TV humor
 

From The Onion

Woman Only Dates On National Television Now
HOLLYWOOD—After stints on Temptation Island, The Bachelor, and For Love Or Money, 23-year-old bartender/model Angela Langdon announced Monday that she refuses to date anyone who's not courting her in a front of a national TV audience. "Unless there's the promise of a million-dollar payday, a romantic evening in the tropics, or a humiliating rejection in front of all of America, I'm not interested," Langdon told potential suitors. "Come with cameras, or don't come at all." Langdon also expressed a preference for network shows over those in syndication.

Host?!? Guest?!?
 

That's Magic Marker-Dick, thank you very much.

TM

big brother
 

S
P
O
I
L
E
R


To answer your earlier question, yes Jack and Erica went up. Jee and Robert want to vote off Erica, but Allison and Jun are talking about voting out Jack, and then having an all-girl alliance since none of the girls think they could beat any of the boys if they made it to the final two. Oh, and Jee won the luxury competition by smashing gnomes (Marcellus from last season made a brief guest appearance) and won one McDonalds meal a day for him and the houseguest of his choice for the week.

It was boooring. Thank god for Tivo b/c I can watch an hour episode in about 25 minutes.

Bravissimo
 

This poll is confusing to me, as I never remember the SG's actual names. They need to use a SG tagline that will make them instantly recognizable to those of us who have watched them.

E.g.,

Deservedly Struggling Artist 19%
Jesus of Nazareth/Hooker from Trenton 11%

etc., etc.

Bravissimo
 

Yes, but they will never, ever run out of guys with back thatch.

At least if my recent trip to the beach is any indicator.

Bravissimo
 

Do people really think John B is a closeted gay man? I LOVED him. I almost cried. He was so adorable.

Bravissimo
 

I can't believe that they ran the poll without including pictures. I mean who the hell keeps track of what the SG's names are? It would be better if it gave a one line description (e.g., "ass man who wants to sing" or "production dude with too much body hair"). Anyway I went and voted for Adam Z. ("unibrow islander whose friends and family hate foie gras"). He was a perfectly acceptable SG. And better than several of them. I would have voted for George though if he was listed on the poll. I never saw the episode with Brian S. (I think it was the first one). Hopefully I'll catch it in reruns.


Edited to note that Gattigap beat me to it... Sigh.

Bravissimo
 

I liked the guy with the Trenton-ho girlfriend, if only because he was so sweetly hopeless to start with and tried so hard to please his heinous psycho-tart girlfriend. Give that boy a medal, and a new chick!

Bravissimo
 

I don't think he is. After all he worked as a stripper. Any guy who comes out of that profession straight is in fact straight. Usual disclaimers, of course.

Bravissimo
 

Brian S. would be doing better if his had not been the first episode aired. John B.'s episode aired near the apex of the hype curve. Post-makeover Brian S. was tasty. He'd be positively scrumptious if he did some push-ups and crunches.

Boy, meet Timmy
 

The Boy Meets Boy website has an embarrassing number of grammar, diction, and spelling errors, even when held to a reality TV show website standard.

Your (well, my) moment of zen. Enjoy and viva La US Open
 

http://www.usopen.org/images/players/atpm605.jpg

http://www.usopen.org/images/players/atpp338.jpg

Your (well, my) moment of zen. Enjoy and viva La US Open
 

THis is really brightening my day. WHile Carlos is best enjoyed in action and photos dont quite capture his magnficence, Mark just blows me away. I cannot think of a better looking man on the face of the universe. And he is six four, and of greek descent. And those eyes are blue. Can anyone top him? And tell me where I might find him this weekend in Manhattan?

Host?!? Guest?!?
 

Because it can have permanent consequences?

Bravissimo
 

Allow me to translate:

The current standings:

Brian S. (Butch the Axe Murderer/Artist) 19%
Adam Z. (The unibrowed self-styled "Superjew") 4%
Tom K. (Pete Yorn looking guy with hooker GF) 11%
John B. (Country guy with Armenian fiancee) 40%
Vincent T. (Bald guy who should stay backup singer) 6%
Andrew L. (Hairy back, snug-fit condom cameraman) 9%
John V. (Cop made Man Quiche for boobage-packing GF) 12%

That's not a saying is it? I have bad news and irrelevant news
 

Is this the baddest and most irrelevant interview question ever?

Q. What do you think about Anna Kournikova doing reporting for a TV network here?

MARK PHILIPPOUSSIS: I don't know to be quite honest. Never gave it much thought.