Remedial Toasting
 

No, no, no, Aaron Sorkin is too pedantic. Not enough humor. Toasting is a Joycian sport.

And if you can't do it right, the best advice is to step aside entirely and make way for those who can. Take the floor once everyone is toasted.

Remedial Toasting
 

I like Atticus, who I've known on the board and in person for awhile now.

But it seems he's too fusty, too uptight and too devoted to "rules" to understand that a brilliant ten-minute story that the entire reception enjoys cannot be compressed into three sentences -- as Coltrane said, "it just takes that long to get it all in."

Here's to Atticus.

Sidd(you may touch your drink now, AG)Finch

Remedial Toasting
 

Here, here!

wearin' BR in tha OC y'all
 

I'm in total violation of the scroll first, post later convention, but yes. Banana Republic specialized in making people look like guests on Brian Fellow's Safari Planet before the Gap decided they needed a high-end store.

I believe BR still pays homage to its roots periodically by stocking a couple correspondent-style vests in its larger stores (maybe just so Stephen Colbert can switch to khaki from bone after Labor Day).

Vegan poll
 

I'm a former salami, corned beef, pastrami, prime rib, cigar-smoking, oh-okay-I'll-have-a-fucking-salad vegetarian.

Now, I give all my money to the cardiologist and can't afford to eat meat.

But I can fuck for hours because my meds render me half impotent. Take that, Sting!

Not that any of you care, but
 

Up the meds, Red.

Vegan poll
 

Why don't you save yourself some time and money while simultaneously solving both your problems by shoving a salami up your ass?

TM

furs
 

Yep. That's exactly how I look in my black leather jacket.

Woo Hoo!!!
 

Guess who just lept onto my bangable list?



Oh. wait. I thought she said shaved .

furs
 

Yeah, but somebody had to do it.

I thought these guys invented Velcro.
 

So you're moving a nearly completed $239 million weather satellite from a vertical position to a horizontal position.

And you drop it.

You drop it because, it turns out, some of your co-workers removed the bolts holding it to the cart because they needed them for another project.

Ooops. Schadenfreude!

Vegan poll
 

You seem to have a real ass fetish going today, Skinny. Have you been helping out your mama again? Or has the move to Jersey finally succeeded in giving you a sorely-needed kick in your too tightly clenched sphincter?

Bitch.

I thought these guys invented Velcro.
 

this cracks me up..."NASA, Lockheed Martin and the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration have formed investigation teams to study the accident, NASA said in a statement."
We need 3 investigation teams to study the accident? I thought guys took the bolts. What's to study? This is so like to government to form 3 teams to investigate 1 thing.

Question relating to sex
 

Precisely. Well that and I was just fucking with her, given the amusing nature of posts explaining things throughout the day.

That aside, I find it not all that surprising a satellite was dropped, but very amusing they are doing some major investigation, which will probably cost some money knowing how anything involved with the government operates, to conclude that someone fucked up and took something he shouldn't have.

And hey, I just used fuck twice, now three times in one post. Fuckin A!

Sexuality
 

So Atticus was so busy reading about bolts that he totally missed this article...Things are getting hot north of the border. At this year's Toronto International Film Festival, Hollywood movies are going under the covers, candidly exploring sexuality.
Meg Ryan shatters her good-girl image by going topless in "In the Cut," and Denzel Washington finally unleashes his sexuality in "Out of Time." Nicole Kidman has a number of racy scenes in "The Human Stain," including one where she strips during foreplay. In fact, "Will you dance for me?" seems to be the most common piece of dialogue in this year's Toronto International Film Festival, which runs through Saturday.

There hasn't been this much sexuality portrayed in realistic and graphic ways in major studio fare since the freewheeling 1970s.

It's not just toned young bodies on display. Sir Anthony Hopkins plays Kidman's geriatric lover in "Stain," and William H. Macy turns up in "The Cooler" as a gambler who engages in marathon sex with a comely cocktail waitress.

Come on dude. Marathon sex. How could you miss that?

Toronto Film Fest with marathon sex

I thought these guys invented Velcro.
 

Notice the Lockheed spokesperson also said "We're reviewing the paperwork." How long would that take? In the real world, this would be a Post-It note saying "We dropped it."

Ok I just got 6 different emails with that stupid virus in it. This is getting annoying.

Sad news for Thrasher
 

Well, not really, but good news for those of us without kids...

Elizabeth Warren is a Harvard law professor and bankruptcy expert and discusses these findings in her new book “The Two-Income Tap: Why Middle-Class Mothers and Fathers Are Going Broke.”
In just twenty years, the number of women filing petitions for bankruptcy had, in reality, increased by 662 percent.

Our study showed that married couples with children are more than twice as likely to file for bankruptcy as their childless counterparts. A divorced woman raising a youngster is nearly three times more likely to file for bankruptcy than her single friend who never had children.
Over the past generation, the signs of middle-class distress have continued to grow, in good times and in bad, in recession and in boom. If those trends persist, more than 5 million families with children will file for bankruptcy by the end of this decade. That would mean that across the country nearly one of every seven families with children would have declared itself flat broke, losers in the great American economic game.
More adults will file for bankruptcy than will be diagnosed with cancer. More people will file for bankruptcy than will graduate from college. And, in an era when traditionalists decry the demise of the institution of marriage, Americans will file more petitions for bankruptcy than for divorce. Heart attacks. Cancer. College graduations. Divorce.
A family with children is now 75 percent more likely to be late on credit card payments than a family with no children. The number of car repossessions has doubled in just five years. Home foreclosures have more than tripled in less than 25 years, and families with children are now more likely than anyone else to lose the roof over their heads.
Full story here

This add popped up when I clicked on NFH's link, and maybe it's just me (are you horny, baby?), but this woman looks very relaxed, and not just because she's on vacation, if you get my drift.
http://www.digikitten.com/playhousev...gleaze/exp.jpg

Yeah. What's she doin' with that hand?

Edited to add...hmmm, I didn't get that ad, I got a Circuit Shitty ad instead.

Ketchup & Other Cravings
 

Same thing happened to me (not a red-meat eater), but I don't need iron. I can't explain it. I have also craved boiled shrimp, lemonade, and sugar-snap peas. I developed aversions to chicken and chocolate early on.

On bankruptcy - I do an occasional Ch.7; Most of my bkr clients are married and most of them seem to be pretty stupid - with the exception of the few that have had real medical crises with no insurance. I also do foreclosures - they are way up in 2002-2003. People with limited funds need to prioritize what gets paid and what they can live without. Mortgage, taxes, and HOA dues come first and if you haven't figured that out - you don't need your house that badly.

-TL

Edited to ad that I got a car insurance pop-up.

The way to get around plane security? Ship yourself of course...on a cargo plane.

http://www.cnn.com/2003/US/Southwest...way/index.html

NotFromHere
TexLex
Obviously I have sexier cookies than the two of you.

I thought these guys invented Velcro.
 

My favorite excerpt:
Is that the PC way to say "we fucked up"?

Question relating to banking
 

So you are mean quite often then?

Was this ever in question? Are you going to put away the nutter butters now or will I have to come over there and make you?

furs
 

Originally posted by TM
Originally posted by SS
Right word, wrong sense. Think Oddyseus, the downy, the hardboiled. TM's into things tricky.

He met this little girlie, her hair was kinda curly
Went to her house and bust her out, he had to leave real early
These girls are really sleazy, all they just say is please me
Or spend some time and rock a rhyme, he says "It's not that easy"

Thurgreed ain't pervd (he don't bed downy birds)
but you assume (on your own)
They offer tits (and lots of ass)
but he just leave it alone
It's like that y'all (y'all), but he don't quit
He keep on (rock!) shock! Cos this is it...

Vegan poll
 

Originally posted by cheval de frise

And is there ever fallout from the radioactive fire you breath, godzilla's got nothing on you, chevy.

pop ups
 

Originally posted by robustpuppy
I didn't think you were the kind of woman that, in the act, would let her fella know she's composing a grocery list.

Remedial Toasting
 

Ye gods, I thought I was the last person in America who knew this rule. I have actually had assjacks say to me (as toast recipient) "But you're not drinking!"

That is when I cease to smile awkwardly and begin to smile patronizingly.

Daaamn
 

And here I was sure that I had spotted you, based on your previously reported 38DD measurements.

Sad news for Thrasher
 

That's some pretty scary shit, but not surprising. Having never (and I mean NEVER) been late on a payment for anything and holding a FICO score in the mid 800s I have never (and I mean NEVER) been able to understand how grown people can fail to prioritize when it comes to money and their homes. Your house is the most important asset you own (actually, the bank owns it) so don't miss or be late on a single fucking payment, EVER.

How can people not get this? Sell your car, ditch the cable/dish, drop the cellphone, stop eating out, tell your kids NO, get a night job at the Quickie Mart -- do whatever it takes to make that payment and if you still can't for God's sake call the bank and try to work something out. If you fear that you will lose your job in the near future, take out a home equity line now while you can but don't use it -- for five years you can draw against it if you need to and that should get you through the rough times. Credit cards and the inability to defer gratification are the root of all this shit.

I was thinking hard about this last night when my husband's college-going sister called for help because she is $9,000 in credit card debt (you are in college, stop spending money you don't have) and had been working with AmeriDebt (the horror! I told her she was a fucking moron for that one) and was now getting collection letters and shit. Long story short, I gave her advice I never thought I would give to anyone -- get an SLS and pay that shit off (because I REFUSE to cosign a loan or give money to someone so irresponsible) and NEVER do it again.

Vegan poll
 

Of everything in that post, your accusation of me moving to Jersey hurt the most.

TM

Sad news for Thrasher
 

Not surprising at all. And not actually that new, vis a vis families with kids being most likely group to go bankrupt. That's been the case for a decade or two. Financial distress, marital dissatisfaction, having kids just looks more and more attractive.
$9K in debt in COLLEGE??? I thought spending other peoples money on tuition was shame enough. Sane people pay the usurers off in full every month whether they have to or not.

How the fuck did she get a card with a $9K limit on it, anyway?
Refuse to cosign a loan EVER. Cosigning someone else's debt is about as stupid as ... pissing away money you don't have yourself. I wouldn't do that for immediate blood relations, never mind inlaws.

Happiness and Bankruptcy
 

These facts underscore just how scary it will be if the bankruptcy reform legislation ever goes through. In a moral/practical sense, I sort of want people to not be able to walk away from credit card debt through Ch 13. However, on the other moral hand, I don't want credit card companies who rope consumers by offering credit to anyone with a pulse to be able to create a virtual debtor's prison for a large segment of society. Both the foolish consumer and the malicious credit-offerors deserve each other IMHO. In the end, I view losses to the big credit card companies like MBNA as a cost of doing business. Making risky bets is part of their business. If they want to have guarantees of payment, then they must lower their interest to near zero.

Anyone read the piece on happiness in the NYTimes mag this past week? Basically, the piece said that people are horrible predictors of what will make them happy in the future, so they stupidly spend on material and keep the consumption merry-go-round going. I felt a good bit vindicated by the piece's subtle gibes at the "conspicuous consumers" among us. I've always spent wildly on pleasure, but not wildly on material, and it was refreshing to see the writer of the piece basically support a theory I've always had - spend your money and time with friends and family, not on stuff. This article should be required reading for everyone chasing his tail in the current economy.

S(you can't go out to dinner and laugh your ass off with your Jaguar)D

Baby showers (etiquette warning)
 

Huh. I wonder if Judith Martin is getting soft? I was surprised by the mild nature of this response. Article is available free from washingtonpost.com, I'm too lazy to supply the actual link.

"Dear Miss Manners:

My unmarried niece gave birth to a little girl last month. Earlier in her pregnancy, her family sent out invitations for a baby shower. Since she lives several states away, I sent a monetary gift and received a lovely thank-you note in return.

I was later quite surprised to learn that the baby was given up for adoption. Is it appropriate to have a shower when the baby is to be given up for adoption? If this was a last-minute decision, should I not have been sent a note of explanation? I do not wish my gift returned, I just feel as if I should have been informed.

[Gentle Reader,]

As a matter of family news, Miss Manners agrees that you should have been informed, but you seem to relate this courtesy to your contribution to the shower. That is a mistake: The baby was born, you gave her a present and you were graciously thanked.

Now -- could we not look too closely into the question of whether there should have been a shower? The decision about adopting might have been made subsequently, as you realize. But even if not, perhaps your niece simply craved this small ritual and wanted to send the child off with things from her family. Miss Manners is not able to begrudge her that. "

Comments?

Miscasting of the century
 

Compared to this, Assfleck looks liek a member of Tony Soprano's crew in Gigli. NTISIOA.

Did anyone read In the Cut, which was quite the book? This is gonna be the final nail in Ryan's career coffin bc the actress most perfect for this role is clearly Catherine Keener, and they are quite a bit different.

Hate when they make bad movies out of good books. (will this inspire a poll?)

Also, I am having just a ballsout terrible time right now and would appreciate it if someone could repost that pic of Bilmore in his lime green thong bathing suit contraption.

Baby showers (etiquette warning)
 

I'm sure she pinned an envelope full of cash to the receiving blanket, no?

sf

Sad news for Thrasher
 

Perhaps the worst advice I ever heard was "You'll never be able to afford kids and there's never a RIGHT time to have them." Ahem, there is a something called wise future planning. You probably ought to consider the huge costs of kids before you go out and have them. Some foolish people I know have had them for a few years now and say "Well, you'll have kids when your 57 and still be saving for college! I'll be on vacation." I usually just smile and say nothing, but what I'm thinking is "I'll be on vacation too, because when I'm 53-58, I'll be at the peak of my earning capacity, and although its morbid to consider, any money we get from relatives passing on will start trickling in to make paying for college, buying the kids cars, etc... easier. You'll be struggling to put kids through school and likely won't have the disposable income to lavish on your college age kids that I'll have because I waited." Now, sure, both schools of thought depend on several assumptions coming true, but I'm willing to bet I'll be flush with a good bit more dough in my 50s than my early/mid forties. Oh, and I'll take those years of tanned relaxation on the beach with my wife now, while we're both young and still attractive, rather than betting on future vacations which may never happen. I'd rather have memories later than bet for a future that cancer/heart disease/accident could take away. There's always life insurance for the kiddies - there's no insurance for a spouse robbed of the best memories of life because you had kids early betting on a golden old age that never came. Its criminal not to get yer ya yas out while you're young and healthy...

S(Oh, and I'm also betting my kids will get scholarships;)D

Sad news for Thrasher
 

I'm not quite sure that I'd rely on a future inheritance on my financial planning. People have a tendency of not dying when you want them to, and sometimes they're not as loaded as you think they are.